Bad Day, very depressed

[sunflower_girl]

The weather outside is terrible, it's raining and chilly. I'm in the house and my heart hurts so much. Honestly, my heart is so broken and I don't know how to put it back together.

 

I woke up at 8 this morning because I had a mid-term in one of my politics classes. I did well but...dang it...I'm so depressed! I miss him so much and I don't understand how someone can just move on with their life so easily. We've broken up for a little more than 2 months but I still miss him. I think about him, the good memories we had, and I just miss having a great friend in my life. I miss the chemistry we had. I miss the kisses. I've been "hanging out" with a new guy on campus but it just doesn't feel the same. I don't think I'm ready to be vulnerable again.

 

I miss my ex and I wish he was still a part of my life. We haven't talked for a while and he no longer returns my calls. I call every couple of days and I feel like a complete stalker after doing so.

 

Sorry if this is a rant, I just need to get all of this out.

[arwen]

Hey girl,

 

After two months it's normal to not be ready for new sparks and still feel blue. Do you feel things have at least become a bit better since the split? I think it will really help if you stop calling him. You feel worse every time you call him and even more so when he doesn't call you back. I am not sure that he is as moved on as you think or as he wants to appear. But stop being so focused on that- your life is about you, not him.

 

Hugs,

 

Arwen

[obscurity]

It is hard, especially after putting so much of yourself into someone you thought loved you back just as much. The key is not to dwell on any past memories. Take it from my past experience:

 

- Delete his phone number from your cell. (write it down somewhere in case you want to call him in the distant distant future)

- Put your time and energy into more important things (school, friends, hobbies... etc)

- Do not start a relationship with this new guy (he will end either being a rebound, or you will spend considerable time comparing him to your ex)

- On mornings when your stuck in bed, drag yourself out, no matter how hard , take 30 seconds do deep breathing (get some O2 into the brain), think positive thoughts, take a shower and study or go for a jog

- For the next month or two try not to isolate your self anywhere for a long amount of time. (go out with friends... stay at school and study.. etc, do things you did before you met your ex)

 

With time he will become a memory, someone that was in your life, that helped you gain experience. "what doesnt kill you will only make you stronger." Believe that line, because it works!

 

Also, think about this. In 3 months from now (you and your ex have broken up for 5 months now), you run into your ex out of the blue! What preception would you want him to have of you? A sad, depressed girl that he used to date which validates even more why you guys broke up? OR, a girl that is moving on, happy, doing extremely well??

 

I cant remember which ENA member posted this quote but it is so true:

"The best revenge is happyness!"

 

Think about that. Keep us posted on how u are doing!