fnlyfrei Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 new marriage, both of us are in our early 40's...still adjusting to married life again. Firstly, he was single for 14 years. I was married for most of my adult life..single for only three really. I am used to marriage, he is used to being the ever-single guy. What is hard for me right now is asking him to change a few things...I feel like a jerk. Firstly, he has a personal website that he adverts on his off-road jeep (his toy) His personal website contains pics of himself, his family and various ex- girlfriends posing for him or with him. None of me. His jeep also has tons of stickers all over it...you know, with the naked girl side profile stickers...he is letting me drive it until I get another car..and its embarrassing. It's like driving a teenagers vehicle.... My question is I guess....do I ask him to change these things or do I ignore them and let him be him? I feel like I am asking him to tone down and be no-fun. But at the same time, what are people going to think when they see his website and they know we are married? I feel like I am asking him to be someone else now...but at the same time, I resent his pictures posted in the web for all the world to see...showing that he dated ALOT.... Link to comment
Honneur Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 The pics need to go. But I don't see a problem with the stickers. Immature... yes. Detrimental to a marriage... no. I don't think he is going to cheat on you with a naked chrome woman. A man and his vehicle are a sacred thing and should not be tampered with. Link to comment
fnlyfrei Posted October 5, 2007 Author Share Posted October 5, 2007 Well, the naked chrome women keep giving him.."the look"...I do not trust them.... Link to comment
Honneur Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 If you really hate them that much, I have an idea. Replace his magnetic chrome babes with very large, naked chrome men. Make sure you weld them on. I guarantee he won't be driving the jeep for awhile. Link to comment
fnlyfrei Posted October 5, 2007 Author Share Posted October 5, 2007 I am going car-shopping this weekend. I am sure everyone who sees me driving that thing is sure that I am a lesbian. I have had some women peering into see who is driving..perhaps they think I am a handsome dude. (shrug) Anyway..too weird. I feel like I am driving a bachelor pad around. This is going to take some time for sure. I DID get him to stop having pop-tarts and m&m's for dinner though..I make him eat vegatables.... Link to comment
ImThatGirl Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 fnlyfrei - How long have you two been together? The thing that concerns me is expecting too much, too quickly, all of the sudden. If these are things that you've accepted all along, it will take very gradual pressure to get him to change his ways... And expecting too much or demanding too much may not go over well. Link to comment
fnlyfrei Posted October 5, 2007 Author Share Posted October 5, 2007 We have known each other just a year now, and have been married for 3 months. Yeah. You are right. Training takes time. Link to comment
ImThatGirl Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 Exactly - - - - - You just don't want to come accross as the women the got the marriage and now wants him to become someone completely different. Obviously I know that's not you! Link to comment
RayKay Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 Honestly; I really am not so sure that you should say anything at all. I just feel - and of course you are totally within your right to feel differently - but when you marry someone it is not saying "marry me; now change!". Rather it is "okay, this is whom you are...I want to be with whom you are marry whom you are". I presume you knew of the jeep and the site BEFORE you got married; and given you knew and accepted it before, I don't think it is you to you to control whether he keeps it or not; if that makes sense. And I doubt it is because he does NOT want pictures of you up there; I think it is just because he has not had them up yet; don't you? I really don't see mudflap girls or pictures of family and exes if they are just casual posing pictures as a "threat" to your marriage - unless you make it one. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted October 9, 2007 Share Posted October 9, 2007 you start talking about my ride that i had before i started dating you, what else are you gonna try and change about me? i'd flip on ya. Link to comment
fnlyfrei Posted October 9, 2007 Author Share Posted October 9, 2007 Well, you haven't seen the thing...and sure, it's a good thing I am not with YOU. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted October 10, 2007 Share Posted October 10, 2007 Well, you haven't seen the thing...and sure, it's a good thing I am not with YOU. exactly. i know what i want and it wouldn't be this. Link to comment
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