never thought I would be asking for advice on this one

[redsuede]

I really know the answer to this.. but I think I need back up reassurance. My ex and I ended September of last year.. FORCED myself this time to get the heck over her. It worked. I worked very very hard.. and now I hardly think about her. We were together for 7 years. I have had NC now for about 4 or 5 months. I have met someone new.. Someone wonderful to me.. very wonderful to me. My ex started about a month ago calling, emailing me.. not saying anything like to get back, mostly saying she wanted to see my kids. I ignored all communication from her. I felt guilty.. cause there will always be a part of me that will love her.. Not in love anymore. Well, today I get this call from her.. Not focused on the kids at all. I ignored the call and her message was "please call me... Its kinda important.. I am just calling to ask you to please call me".. I am thinking that I really shouldnt call.. I dont want to go back to that feeling of "prison hell"...but mostly.. I have someone new.. and I have very high morals.. I wouldnt want her to worry.. but.. should I at least be calling back to see what she wants?

[DN]

If it was urgent she would tell you what it is that she wants or needs.

 

If you are in love with the new woman in your life - don't answer her.

[Blazer]

Hi redsuede,

I think if I were in your position, and I felt as though I had moved on, I wouldn't see the harm in returning the call. The most important thing to me would be how certain I was about being over the ex ... if talking to her would cause you pain, set back your healing or endanger your new relationship, then I wouldn't call her back. I might instead send her an email asking her what she wanted to discuss if there were concerns about a voice conversation taking an uncomfortable turn. But no matter what, take some time and think it over.

 

Regards,

 

Blazer

[CelesteSeven]

agreed. if it were really that urgent, she'd find an alternative mean to get your attention. showing up? sounds like she's just tugging you along... she may have something of some interest to say, but nothing dire that she absoultely needs you for.

you've been strong so far, as you've said! don't give up or give in to her! it's probably (and unfortunately) what she wants.

good luck!

[barbielovesmac]

I'd ignore her.

[redsuede]

Thank you.. I guess I knew these answers.. I just needed someone else to tell me that Its still OK to still move on with my life.. even though she was my number 1 importance in this world.. cause the guilt started creeping in really really quick. SHE is the one who left me continually over and over again.. so ... in one way.. I think.. NO WAY