Shikas

thanks guys for the advice....and i really appreciate what u all have suggested..I wasnt thinking to have a baby to have him back into my life..I have been through a lot in my life..I already have a 8yr of daughter..I was married before and abused physically and mentally...After i got divorced...I met a guy who took advantage of me for his own benefits....He financially used me...and then i broke up with him...then i met this guy..who was separated with his wife then....after few months when i fell in love with him...he turns around and tells me that his parents are pushing him to work out his marriage..He comes to me..and tells me that he loves me and will never forget...and if in the future it doesnt work out with her..he will come back..but while she was there..he was still seeing me...and suddenly one day i broke the secret to his wife..and he got upset...and i lost him forever...I Loved him...and i admire him a lot..his intelligence , his looks and his personality...being with three guys in my life...I had enough...and i feel very lonely..I dont think i will fall in love again..My heart has been torn apart which will never heal...So i thought to have his baby and spend the rest of my life living with his kid...and nourish..educate him ...as well as give him his name....when he grows up...and become something...then i will tell him who the father was..and that i never stopped loving him....even though he hurt me so much...That is the only reason why i wanted to have his baby...

Look into her eyes....grab her and kiss her....when i meet my boyfriend...he doesnt waste any time....no matter how much we fight or think that we shouldnt meet...or if we break up...and meet after a while.....he still kisses me.....its like ..nothing has gone wrong between us...and I love that....He turns me on... U do the same.....

I love him so much....that i cant live without him..but i know that he loves me too...but cant be with me....We broke up..and i miss him badly..He was separated from his wife..when he was dating me...and suddenly she pops up...and they back together...he was still seeing me once a week...but we only made love the day before we broke up..cuz i told him wife that he was having an affair with me..It was a bad mistake which i regret now..He was not talking to me anymore nor emailing me...and I was devasted cuz i missed him badly...and i wanted things to go as it was before between us. After 4months..He started talking to me over the phone..just general...and i convinced him that i want to meet him...so he agreed..when we met...he kissed me..but didnt tell me how he feels for me...I kept falling in love with him...and i feel that i really want him some how...so i thought...if not him..why not his baby...I could spend the rest of my life having his baby with me...to show him that i loved him..so much..But dont know if he will want to make love to me again or not..may be i have to seduce him a bit...hopefully he doesnt use condoms..usually he withdraws on my tummy...Is it possible to collect that when he goes to the bathroom...and use that later and get pregnant..i dont know if it will be still fresh enough to get pregnant....Sounds unusual...but i really want to have his baby...Cuz i love him so much.....Any suggestions...

Iam in the same situation...I broke up with him 4 months ago...but i still cant forget him..he is on my mind all the time..I stop my self from calling him and emailing him..but i end up doing that...and he doesnt respond...simply shows that he doesnt care..I know this..but still why do i feel that I still want to see him..and talk to him...Iam so depressed..that i dont feel like doing anything but just lie down and think of him...Sometimes i want to kill myself...cuz i cant take this pain anymore..It hurts rite in my heart. I feel that my heart was separated from my body and it was abused rapidly...wounded, teared apart and then put back in my body...for me to suffer the pain that its causing in me. I just dont have any remedy to heal my self...I dont know what to do.....i wish someone tell me something.....or an angel comes to rescue me....and remove all the pain that iam feeling..

Hi Iam shikas..I broke up with my boyfriend 4 months ago...but i still cant stop thinking about him. The month i broke up with him..inspite of my feelings for him... i got engaged to another guy who is in my country of my mums choice...but i think i love him..When i came back to Sydney..I started thinking about my boyfriend...and i kept calling him...just to hear his voice...I kept emailing him....and he never replied..I started my Uni this year...and its so hard to study because i keep thinking about him..and recently he started talking to me over the phone..and two days ago ..i met him after 4months. He kissed me....but unfortunately he doesnt tell him his feelings..and sometimes ignores.me..He is married...thats why he doesnt want to tell me his feelings. But i feel that i cant forget him..and when iam home..i just want to listen to sad songs and think of him...i miss him...but he doesnt care. I want to get on with my life..and totally not think of him..but my fiance...I just dont know how to stop thinking of him....Please someone tell me how..