Hero_Kills_World

if i could, i'd totally do it. The thing is, its nearly impossible to not see her. because we have so many of the same friends, and because i see her nearly every time i go to a differnt class, I'd have to stop most of my friendships for her, and risk being late to classes.On the counseling part, i really dont know how to go about getting it at this time, or how i would even ask my parents about it, since my other siblings have never had problems like this. but, thanks for the advice anyhow Lost, really appreciate it.

I can't stand it anymore, and my feelings keep hurting me... The problem is, im in love with a friend of mine, and we can be pretty good friends, sometimes, but othertimes, she can be really cold towards me. Because of this, somedays i will come home and become EXTREMELY depressed. because how i feel the rest of the day is based on how i feel emotionally when i get home, ill sometimes want to die. I know its not a good thing that i love her so much, but no matter how hard i try i cant get her out of my head. I really wish i hadent fallen so hard for her, because its just stupid the way things go sometimes. If i could just maybe accept that i will never be with her, and that she isnt worth it, maybe i wouldent feel as horrible as i do half the time. For some stupid reason, accepting that just seems liek too big a thig for me to do.

I'm able to understand exactly what you're going through. A perfect mirror. For the past few months, through freshman year and now as a sophmore, ive been dealing with so many differnt feelings, constant deja vu, always so paranoid, ive started caring less and less about what people say. And like you, i want to be dragged off and "fixed". you're not alone, because although its almost fun having this...i want it to stop already.We're the "lucky" few who share the same head, but dont think you have to carry it by yourself. ^.^

Well, i wrote this a few months ago. at the time i was ready to kill myself because i felt that was the only way to escape something i wasn't ready to face.Anyway story ends, no one died. everythings much better now though ^.^ ------------ Four years we roam these halls first few days are never alright but the years keep going, we figure the system. and we pass by, with cold eyes shut, lonley. you dont see me. Time goes on and eventually we come to a point where i had never exisited. but you continue to lie lie through your teeth as you had so many times before and final days close in and force me to say au revoir...we never see eachother again. until then we will be forced together by lucid dreams of forced love and hatred, by tells and truths of those we know and trust, by Friends who'll force us, because we realise Four years have passed--we never really met.

truth is yeah, I really am. but the thing thats keeping me from telling her is that she's just so weird about things like this so its a little akward trying to bring this topic up. I know it seems childish to do this, and it might end up with someone getting hurt, but it almost fun...i cant really explain it

well, I'm not too good at explaning things, but ill try my best regardless-- See, there's a friend i have whom i love very much, She's really important to me and i she's one of my best friends and we hang out together, atleast A LOT more than all of my other GUY friends....(actually i'm really the first or only guy who's called to go out), but when we're around eachother and our friends, or rather when she's around i try to make her jealous. I really don't think about it even, but its more like an automatic action. I've got plent of other girl-friends who i hang around with and i love as my sisters, but when she comes around I'm more clingy than i usually am towrds them. This, in turn or alteast what i process it as in my head, makes her almost ignore me, or just pay more attention to other guys who never get the "hey lets do something this weekend" from her. But with her being so emotionaly inward with everyone it would be hard to just say "I love you" without solid proof she'd feel the same way back. it's not always like that, but many times it seems like we're just playing a game called "Who gets Jealous First". i guess when two scorpions fight it's gonna get messy.