kauaiangirl83

Thanks so much for all the feedback. She was very aware that I love my boyfriend very much and that we are planning on getting married within 2 or 3 years. I've talked to a mutual friend of me and this girls' and she said that she thought that Jody was just jealous of Sterling (my bf). I understand that she needed her time with me or whatever, but seriously, I don't think that she should have been giving me bad advice just to hurt me. I have tried to tell her time and time again to respect the time difference because there are other people living in this house that are sleeping when she calls. As for the letter idea, I think that's a good way of possibly getting my feelings out. Thanks for the good tips. If anyone else has any suggestions, please let me know... Thanks a lot!

my former best friend and I are no longer friends. We were roomates for one year in college and we hit it off great. We hung out 24/7 and we had so much fun. We got to be so close that I considered her my sister vice versa. She was there for me a lot when my grandpa passed away and when I was having trouble with my bf. After I left that college and came home we had to talk on the phone or email and we didn't get to talk nearly as much as we would like to. Our conversations started to only be about her and when I would try to tell her what was going on in my life, she wouldn't listen. On top of that, she always gave me bad advice about my bf (this girl has never dated anyone, but she wanted to give me advice). She said horrible things like my bf is just making an excuse to break up with me. Everytime we talked she wanted me to break up wtih him even though she knows that i truly love him so much... she would not stop calling my house. She just would call way too much all the time and super early (there's a big time difference between hawaii and michigan and she always forgot about that). At first i'd have someone else answer the phone and tell her that i wasn't home. But then I answered the phone and told her to not ever call me again. I've changed my email and cell phone number to avoid her because I just think that she's being rude. My question is i don't know if i was too harsh on her. I've tried telling her before that she needs to listen to me, but she wouldnt'. She would have no problem running up my cell phone bills with her phone calls that were about nothing important. I guess i just feel bad... IF anyone could help, that would be awesome! thanks

It sounds to me like this guy has absolutely no clue as to what he wants or how he feels. Maybe he's trying to keep you just close enough to talk to whenever he wants just in case he gets his head straight. I think that you should try the no contact thing so that you can clear your head and not be so confused. Hope this helps a little...

Gosh, I can totally relate. When me and my bf first met, he called me all the time and we could talk on the phone for hours and I'd email him a lot during the day and i'd receive one email just saying hello. What I have learned is that my bf and I show each other that we care about each other in different ways. I want to be near him and talk to him 24/7, but he's not much of a talker at all. What I've tried to do is not have high expectations of him so that I won't be disappointed. For instance, we're in a LDR and I would write him like once a week or so. he never wrote to me ever so the last thing i expected was mail from him. But within the next 3 weeks or so I got 3 packages from him and it totally made my day. It's so much more meaningful when guys do special things on their own instead of us trying to hint at or prompt them to do something. Anyways, I hope that this helps!

I think that sometimes people don't like conflict so they don't say anything. my bf does this when he's mad, he just pushes me away and I'm clueless as to what happened. Unfortunately, you can't make them tell you what's wrong. you did everything you can. Now she has to give her 2 cents. If she can't do that, then you'll have to let go. I know that it's much much easier said than done, but seriously, if she doesn't want to spend that energy on you, why should u waste your energy on her? Maybe your supposed to befriend someone else later on that you would not have had the opportunity to meet if you were still friends with her. I dunno, just my guess...

Hi everyone, I've been with my boyfriend for over a year and a half now. He just moved to San Francisco and I'm still back home in Hawaii. We're doing the long distance thing and lately it's been tough. Some days he's totally happy and excited to talk to me and tell me everything that happened that day, but other days he's so tired that he gets mad at me. when i ask him to open up to me, he tells me that i'm being too whiny and i need to grow up and then he hangs up on me. If I try to call him back, he gets even more pissed, but if I dont' know what's going on I get super bad panic attacks and freak out. I'm guessing that he thinks that i'm being too clingy or something. I really love him with all my heart, but i hate the fact that when he doesn't want to talk he just hangs up on me. I've tried talking to him about it and he says that he'll try to not do that and he keeps his promise for like a week and then it just starts up again. I know that at times i'm super insecure and i want to know that everything is ok and when I'll be able to move up there next month. The thing is that we're fighting right now and i'm scared that if we keep fighting that we won't be able to live together and i'll get sent back on a plane and i'll have to come back here. I'm just super confused. I know that i love this guy, but sometimes all the fighting drives me nuts. We've tried taking time apart, but that doens't work at all. I dont' want to lose him, but i feel like if he doesn't change then i can't be happy. If i try to talk to him about this, he hangs up on me. I think it's a really immature thing to do, but i can't stop it...*sigh* Sorry for rattling on and on. Someone, anyone, please give me some realistic advice... thanks

Hey, I totally understand what you mean. I don't know exactly what you should do either except to really think about what you want. I had to do this as this was my problem with my boyfriend too. I needed my space. He was too clingy at times and it just bugged me. So i think that you should take some time to yourself to get your head straight. If you do decide to break things off with him, be honest in telling him your feelings. Try not talking to him for a while after that so that you don't lead him on. I hope this helps.