I screwed up, so friend ruined my reputation beyond repair

Please help...

A few years ago this girl i had hung out with a couple times wanted me to go to a party with her. It was a sunday and i started a new job the next day and told her 10 times i did not want to go. She guilted me into it and i went. She promised we would leav at 6pm. We did not get home unitl 3:00 am!!!!! I had asked her repeatedly since it started to get dark to go. I was livid, i strted a job the next day and she did not care.

At this party i had too much beer and ended up punching and spitting at the girl who drove me there. Finally we got in the car and left. Horrible inexcusable behavior on my part that i am sorry for. We both said horrible hurtful things to eachother. She dropped me off and then she texted me saying i broke her hand (absolutely untrue). This was definitely out of character of me.

I was so pissed tht i just ignored her, never spoke about the situation with anyone and thought it would blow over.

No she has told everyone on the planet terrible untrue things about me, she has ruined lifetime friendships of mine, hurt job opportunities for me, this has gotten around to everyone i know. And the sad part is no one has even told me, i fgured it out as i started to lose fb friends for no reason other than they are friends with her. My reputation completely ruined, hers looking just fine. I nevr even wanted this person in my life! I dont even know where she came from. I had to move out of the state and still this haunts me.

What do i do about this? I never told her to stop talking about me. This was three years ago! I had let this go, but everytime my ptsd acts up i cant stopr thinking about how everyone hates me.

I am willing to apologize but she needs to know where she went wrong and how much worse (from my perspective) is what she is doing running her mouth than me acting like a real jerk out of frustration and ptsd>

any thoughts? I am so upset. I cannot talk about this with anyone, bcause i would be resorting myself to her level of gossip and bd mouthing. Help here appreciated. I am just incredibly sad about all of this.

Don't waste your time thinking about her and what she did. You don't deserve to a friend like her. Block her in FB.

I'm sorry for what she did to you. See a therapist. Try to learn from your situation. good luck.

I was going to recommend moving out of the area, but I see that you moved to another state. I fail to see how that did not solve the problem. chi

Why is this still an issue, if you moved?

Why didn't you just get a taxi home? It's inexcusable that you ended up punching her and spitting on her.. even if you say "sorry" you have crossed the line. She didn't force you to stay at the party, you were free to leave whenever you pleased. How did you end up staying until 3am if you had work the next morning? How did she "guilt" you into going to this party? Have you no self control? From what you are describing you deserve your reputation to be destroyed. You can complain about it and say that this girl was in the wrong but any of her faults become insignificant when tell us you hit her and spat on her. Having said that you can redeem yourself... try not to resort to violence, there are no excuses for that!

How old is she? How does she have the power to "hurt job opportunities"? Do you work now or are you still unemployed? Unfortunately she can tell her version of the events to whomever she wants in whatever way she wishes.

Why not delete her and all her people from all your social media. If you had rock solid friends, a rock solid job/resume, etc none of this would be making you wonder.

So the bottom line is if you have lost friends or "job opportunities" it is on you but you are somehow assuming all these bad things are happening because of some smear campaign she must be on from years ago..

A few years ago this girl i had hung out with a couple times

No she has told everyone on the planet terrible untrue things about me, she has ruined lifetime friendships of mine, hurt job opportunities for me, this has gotten around to everyone i know.