jadestoneau

Where are the boundaries for parents? especially for the fathers. Is kissing a child below the belly abuse? Or kissing their bums? When is it considered abuse?? Any advice appreciated.

My opinion is tell her that it's a relationship or it's nothing. You are going to feel confused everytime she does this. What do u tell your friends and family? you are a couple or just friends. Friends dont sleep together. It just makes the situation more complicated. What about your feelings? What about when she sleeps with some one else and saids that their just friends? just a thought

Well has my week been weird...sorry its so long With all these feelings in my head I knew enventually they would come out, so I had a real serious talk with my partner. I couldn't hold it in any longer. He knew something was wrong, he picked it up earlier. I started crying and got really upset cause I knew I had to make the biggest decision of my life. Anyway I just told him that I hated the way his step-daughter acts around him, and I don't like the way she talks to me or him. Basically I didnt want her near us. He started saying he can't change the way she is, and he can't choose his family. Basically I said that your no longer with your ex, and that life is over. I was totally honest with him, and I told him that it made me jealous, but thats my problem. Man, did I spill everything. It felt so good, I was so afraid I telling him how I felt. I said to him that I don't want a life with him if she was going to be around, it was time to move on and let me be. I told that I didnt want any contact with him anymore and let me get on with my life so I stop feeling like this. I have NEVER seen him so hurt before and so upset that I was telling him to leave me. He wouldn't pack his bags, he refused to go. Man, did he make me anygry. Anyway we talked and talked for so hours until we were all talked out. I have never asked my partner to disown his step-daughter not once, or even make a choice between us. Then he made his own choice and it was me. I was totally shocked! He said it's not worth losing me over someone that cause trouble all the time. He said that his daughter doesnt make him happy, I do. He said since he has been with me, his life has changed and he loves the way he is now. I never every knew he would make a choice like that, because he always told me that he would never give up on his step-daughter, so what chance did I have with him. Anyway, we talked more and finally came to some agreement on issues. All I know is that he promised me that things would change and his daughter will no longer cause trouble. And I realised that I have to sort out my *jealousy* problem and talk more to my partner about stuff. The point of my post on here was to get some advice, I dont have anyone to talk to about this stuff and I think strangers can see it from another point of view. thanks for your posts

Am i doing the right thing?? I having been seeing my partner for almost a year now, and we planning to get married in 2005. I love my partner so much and I would do anything for him. I have a big problem and the only way I can get rid of it is leave my partner. My partner has a non-biological daughter that he classes her as his own. The problem is that she is so negative about things, puts my partner down sometimes, hates his friends and make up lies about her life. I can't stand to be around her, and she has a few times abused me. My partner tells me all the time that she will come around one day, and maybe we can be friends. The problem is that I dont want to be friends with her, I cant stand her been around my partner. And she acts like a little girl, which she is almost 21 years old. We she visits his at our home, she acts like that she needs all the attention from everyone and one thing I dont like is that she sits on my partners lap, basically with nothing on. Friends of ours have approached me about if there was something going on, but I know there isnt. When she rings the house, she doesnt make conversation with me and demands to talk to her 'dad'. I have no idea what to do, I hate that she's around and I know there's not much I can do. My partner saids he wont give up on her, but I cant sit there and let her act the way she does. I know we cant control people. But the only thing I can do is leave, it hurts too much. I don't want to keep getting upset and angry or even jealous that she rings or comes over. Please anyone some advice would be nice. thanks

thanks for you quick reply. I did use those 2 steps. 1. I dicussed with him that I couldn't handle been like this and I wanted to end it. But it made us upset even more. 2. He didn't want to lose me or leave me. So he made a choice that he would no longer have contact with her. But he hasn't done anythng about it yet. I didn't force him to make that decision, but I know I'm worth it for him to do that. I know I would be by his side through out life. But his ex would grill him about it and blame me for his choice. I would anything for him but I know it's my jealousy not his. I just hate feeling like a jealousy bitch.

How do I overcome jealousy? I have been with my fiance since last year and we are planning to get marriage in feb 2005. The problem is that I can't handle my partner talking to his ex-girlfriend. She sometimes calls the house and never askes how I am. I get jealous that she still keeps in contact with him for no reason. They aren't that close anymore, and he dreads he calls. Most of the time I get angry at him when it's not his fault. His ex and I were friends at one stage before him and I got together. When they broke up, we started dating. So I know it may of hurt her knowing we were together. But it's been a year gone. I've tried communicating with her but no luck from her. She tells my partner that I'm gonna wreck his life,etc. So that makes me not want to be friends with her. But been friends with might make it easy for my partner, he won't be torn between us. But I still feel that I don't want to be her friend. It's been so hard for me to cope with this and I've never had this problem when I was married to my husband. I hate feeling uncomfortable and jealous over nothing. I know my partner loves me. I love been in this relationship but I dont want to runied it with jealousy. Does anyone have the same problem? when does jealousy end??