Compatibility in Long-Term Couples: Why Compatibility Matters More Than A List Of Ideal Attributes

We've all heard the saying "opposites attract", but when it comes to the longer and more committed bonds of long-term relationships, it can take a lot more than attraction to make sure things don't eventually fizzle out. Scientists have discovered that while physical attraction is an important factor in attracting another person, two partners must feel compatible on many other levels in order for a relationship to last.

Simply put, compatibility means having enough common ground for two people to be able to empathize with each other, build trust, communicate effectively, overcome obstacles together, and establish the necessary bonding and connection that serves as a solid foundation for a lasting relationship. Despite the pervading notion of the "ideal list" of traits that everyone seems to be looking for in a potential partner, true compatibility goes much deeper than "having nice hair" or being highly educated. The fact is that everyone has different relationship needs and wants. Real compatibility boils down to understanding and accepting these differences in order for a relationship to be healthy and successful over the long-term.

When two people come together and understand their individual needs and wants, they can build upon that understanding to create foundations that will serve them no matter how challenging the times get. Exercise compassion, understanding and consideration towards your partner, both in words and actions, and respect the idea that while your needs may not always match your partner's perfectly, that doesn't mean the relationship won't last. Go beyond surface level conversations about politics and hobbies and dig deep into the real nitty-gritty – discussions about family dynamics, cultural backgrounds, career aspirations and childhood traumas can often spark important conversations that lead to better understanding and genuine intimacy between two people.

Couples who make an effort to identify their compatibility issues as early on as possible are more successful in creating solutions and finding compromise. These solutions should never merely scratch the surface – deep thinking, understanding, respect and sometimes sacrifice are key on both sides to ensure those foundations are strong. Developing effective communication patterns that allow both partners to share their feelings openly with one another is also important when it comes to creating clear boundaries and addressing any underlying issues before they become too big.

Display sincere affection for each other without feeling obligated or required to go along with something you feel uncomfortable with just for the sake of keeping the peace – honest dialogue about what does and does not work is essential for any healthy relationship. Assess your individual likes and dislikes thoughtfully and give yourself permission to express them confidently. Flexibility is an important trait which helps identify core values that could shape the compatibility between two people – for instance, if one person loves dancing and the other hates it but is willing to consider it occasionally for the sake of their partner's happiness, then that could be indicative of a strong foundation a couple can build upon.

So take a moment and think about the deeper characteristics you and your partner possess – instead of stressing over a "list of ideal attributes" you think you should be looking for in someone else. Ask yourself if your expectations are realistic in terms of developing lasting relationships, or if there might be room for some flexibility – and whether or not understanding and compatibility is present in your current relationship. These measures can help you assess any long-term relationships you may have when it comes to compatibility, guarantee a stronger bond between two people, and increase your overall satisfaction within the relationship.