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  • Matthew Frank
    Matthew Frank

    A Best Man's Succor: Responding Graciously to an Overwhelming Task

    Being asked to be the Best Man to a friend is no small undertaking. It comes with greater responsibility and could entail a degree of commitment far outside one's every day duties. The arrival of a request to oversee a five-day bachelor party and two weddings may have left the invited Best Man quivering with trepidation. How can one respond graciously to such a request?

    For many men and women, being asked to be the Best Man or Maid of Honor is a truly honorable honor. It is indeed a lofty title and carries with it a certain set of expectations in order to fulfill this call. Planning a bachelor party can be a monumental task for one person and organizing an ideal wedding is an even larger endeavor. When presented with this twofold mission, it may leave the overwhelmed Best Man asking himself “You’ve got to be kidding,” out of sheer confusion.

    It is in this situation a best man must take a breath and respond graciously to his charge. For those who feel up to the challenge, one of the first steps should be to reach out to family and friends in order to build up a team. While it is certainly an enormous proposal, it can become significantly more manageable when there are several faces on the playing field. With enough help, it may be possible to determine a game plan that will satisfy both the bride and groom, while still giving the sense of adventure that a bachelor party should provide.

    Moreover, it is of the utmost importance to communicate with the bride and groom honestly, but responsibly. They too must understand the depth of their ask, especially when time is an issue. It would be wise to talk through their motivations and expectations while also pushing back if the requests appear unmanageable. Working together to customize their vision can ensure something that doesn't overload the Best Man, yet still satisfies their demands.

    From here, the Best Man can begin to make it a reality. Arranging transportation, lodging, activities, venues, supplies, and a guest list are all part of the process. To prevent it from becoming overbearing, it may be advised to break the task into parts and assign each member of the team with a different goal. This can alleviate the stress of completing such a challenge alone and make the focus more collaborative.

    In reference to weddings, it becomes significantly more important to initiate open lines of communication. Outline a timeline for both events and make sure to dedicate time to rehearsal dinners and practice sessions before the big day. Together with the bride and groom, go through the wedding itinerary and prioritize any unanswered needs. Make sure to ask what favors or decorations they may require and enlist help to come up with ideas. The best way to make a wedding ceremony special is to listen to what the pair really wants and do what is imperative to bringing their dream wedding to life.

    Responding graciously to the badge of Best Man is absolutely achievable. With a focused yet flexible attitude, it makes it possible to reply in a manner that honors the bride and groom's vision. Thus, a Best Man can make the most of the bells and whistles entailed in overseeing two wedding ceremonies and a five-day bachelor party by obtaining a team of trustworthy individuals, maintaining sensitive dialogue with the couple, and a breakdown of the celebration into sections. A response more graceful than ‘You’ve got to be kidding’ is within reach.

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