Finding the Beat of Your Own Drum: A Guide to Reclaiming Autonomy

We all want to find ecstasy in life; pleasure, success, and fulfillment. The siren song of "sex, drugs, and rock and roll" has been a cultural shorthand for indulging in life's experiences, something people have sought out since ancient history. It can be the path to a desirable wildness or a spiral down into dangerous behaviors. For those wanting to explore this path on their own terms, it's important to find ways to safely self-express, while maintaining personal accountability and autonomy.

Many of us are taught to believe that our individual wants, needs and desires are secondary to the whole, something of little value in comparison. This dismissive approach leads to feelings of worthlessness and prevents us from being able to act independently. Seeking alternative methods of stimulation can lead to the empowering realization that nobody else can define your life experiences like you can. The “sex, drugs, and rock and roll” mantra can often provide us with an avenue to find an inner strength that has been submerged by societal pressures.

Traditionally, "life-changing experiences" have been thought of as having a romantic, rebellious nature, with illicit activities seen as a way to escape from reality. Unfortunately, what can seem like an exhilarating sense of adventure often comes with very real risks. Dabbling in excess of any kind makes us especially vulnerable, luring us into false vows of safety, harming or blinding us to potential consequences. Because of this, approaching alternative forms of self-expression such as drugs and sex must be done with caution.

That begs the question, then: can one pursue the freedom sex, drugs, and rock and roll promise without descending too far into recklessness?

A balance must be struck between exploring acceptable boundaries and possible harms. Achieving this is easier said than done. To start, a person should begin to think critically about their motivations, weighing them carefully and considering why they're making particular choices. From these considerations, an individual can begin to learn what's important to them, building up their sense of autonomy, allowing them to reassert rightful control over their actions.

While it may sound easy in theory, the real challenge is in identifying those areas that provoke enjoyment, but yet fall within safe limits. One way to achieve this is with experimentation in more benign environments, such as music events, exploring the impact certain sounds or vibrations can have on a person's state of mind. There's no strict "right" way or activity that works the same for everyone. A great way to come to understand something is to go through it first-hand, so don't be scared of trial and error.

The world is awash with stimulants, from mind-altering substances, to less literal offerings such as shopping, gaming, and movies, almost anything can be used for some short of stimulatory affect. Some may be healthier than others, but that ultimately comes down to worldview and/or interpretation. Inevitably however, for many, there will always be a draw to more extreme substances.

Those tempted to delve into more extreme substances should use a measured approach. If you aren't already familiar with a drug, then research that drug thoroughly, understanding both what it's effects are, and how and why it works. Do proper assessments of your mental, emotional, and social environment. Try and understand beforehand the risks associated with taking a particular drug, as well as the potential psychological after-effects of certain experiences.

It is up to you to seek out pleasure, embrace the joy and risk it brings, while also protecting yourself and fiercely holding onto to your freedom. To keep the madness at bay, nurture the boundaries that make room for sexual exploration and drug use, while recognizing it should never become the primary pursuit. Remember, it is easy to turn something that offers great freedom into an oppressive prison. The best way to experience the power of "sex, drugs and rock and roll" is to find your own beat, and make your own rules.