Just the worst and lowest i have ever felt

[canadIAN]

So i moved to Canada about 5 months ago, it started off bad, it got better i made friends.

 

i made one great friend, and me and her started flirting, and we kissed about 2 weeks ago now, but it didnt end well. i am a guy and i am such a i keep wanting just to have someone to hold

 

ontop of that i said to my mum i wanted to move back and now she isnt talking to me, i just feel stuck in life, i have considered pills and at the worst times i feel so stuck the only reason i dont kill myself is becuase i am to scared it would hurt, i wouldnt give it a second thought if it was painless, i didnt know where to make this thread, i just need people to assure me that i am not mentally , that its normal to feel slightly like you want it to end, which i know is strange.

 

ooo really sorry about the language bit guess its just my stupid fault

[canadIAN]

its not all becuase i screwed up with a girl.

 

i feel if i went back to England my mum would resent me, she already said "once your 18 you can do what you like, but your sister and brother is here and thats where we want to stay when your 18 you can go live where you like you can go live in south africa for all i care, but this is my only chance to live here and i dont want to leave your brother and sister"

 

i felt completley un-loved this is at the point i had found out that i had screwed up, but basically what i think she was saying was we dont care about you as much as them? anyone else see that?

[canadIAN]

Hi! It's ok to have these feeling you are not alone. We are all here to talk to you and be here for you. (----hugs----)

 

thank you so much

 

i'm only 16 and my life seems so messed up, but noone listens simple becuase i am 16! i am old enough in alot of countries to chose to drink, smoke, drive but all of a sudden my oppinions dont matter.

 

i have a skin condition that darkens my skin (it doesnt make me look weird just constantly tanned) but i look like noone in my family becuase of it and it freaks me out.

 

my mum and dad got divorced when i was 10 and got back together 2 years later but still i cant forgive my dad for walking out like that he only left a note!

 

i was having the best summer ever and it got ripped away from me, its not the same here and i know people would love to make a new start but i really did not want to.

 

i have been hurt so many times and now i am way to scared to even think about oppening up ever again

[canadIAN]

plz someone talk this out with me?

[canadIAN]

i know i sound needy its becuase i really really am

[canadIAN]

i guess i really am that screwed up, well then, maybe its time to just give up.

 

thanks anyway

[Dako]

So do you attend school?

 

Being 16 and feeling alone is a tough situation, but withdrawing into yourself or dreaming of suicide is a trap to break out of.

Do you have any interests at all? Sure you feel down, but everyone has something they enjoy just for themself.

 

I'll use an example.

Let's say you enjoy reading to escape the crappy world.

You could seek out books that enhance your life through simple escapism.

 

If you ride a bicycle, you could plan a long ride to a distant campground.

If you pick up a guitar, draw or even lose yourself in videogames, that escapism can give you a break from the daily grind.

 

When life sucks for me, I walk out the front door and go until I'm hurting, then by the time I get back, a shower and a meal seem like heaven.

 

Just a thought.

[kevin_18]

I'm not really an advocate of escapism but it's better than the escapism of negative thoughts and day-dreaming on suicide.

 

As far as confronting reality is concerned: Are you in an awkward situation with this girl?

 

If whatever it is with her has messed you up from yourself and your circle of friends then perhaps you should think of a way of apologising. Make sure you get her to one side by yourself and tell her how sorry you are and all that.