Viper55666 Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 guys, such a crappy day for all of us! wiley - gosh that's horrible that your ex would put a status like that on facebook... that's just childish!! and untagging the photos, well that i can understand a little more. Ugh, we should NOT be hearing about our exes!! Ash - I'm glad you got your reply!! I got something similar from my ex and 1 week later apparently he was commited to someone else! Love sucks! I wish I could understand it... please share! the only reason I can think of is so no new blokes on the scene know shes married. Please, please give me the womans perspective on this so I can stop the crappy thoughts going through my head! Link to comment
brazilgirl21 Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 Viper - Ok, first, when I broke up with my ex, for example, and was happy being single, I never really took any of his photos down and haven't now that he screwed up with me. So basically, I don't really take this photo tagging thing very seriously. It's where I store my photos, it's my history, whatever you know? My ex doesn't have facebook anyways but a lot of people we know I still have the photos but it doesn't bother him because I mean, it's part of our history? It doesn't bother guys that are interested in me either. Therefore, in my opinion, why would your ex need to lie to the guys she wants to "get with"? If she untagged those photos there's only one person she wants to affect... you. At least that's how I see it? Why she wants to affect you I have no idea. 1 Link to comment
Viper55666 Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 me neither! I just dont understand... I feel like texting her and just saying " * * * !!!! you change your name and untag yourself from all the photos on facebook do I really mean that little to you???" but that probably wouldn't be wise! I just wish I knew what was going on in her head! ](*,) Link to comment
brazilgirl21 Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 keep NC, it's the only way to control yourself! Link to comment
agape-mama Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 -- ash -- That's great that you got a reply! yay! Some thing closure is over-rated, and perhaps it is, but it is nice when we can get it! Good for you, feeling happy about moving on is what it's all about! Link to comment
agape-mama Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 me neither! I just dont understand... I feel like texting her and just saying " * * * !!!! you change your name and untag yourself from all the photos on facebook do I really mean that little to you???" but that probably wouldn't be wise! I just wish I knew what was going on in her head! ](*,) Oh Viper, that's rough! are you still "friends" with her on FB? I'd suggest deleting the friendship. I think it's pretty low for her to un-tag herself, I mean, gosh - it was her wedding too! It's hard to say Why she would do that... maybe it is hurting her too? Maybe she's just trying to mess with your mind? I say, make distance and keep NC! Good Luck man! We're here for ya! Link to comment
Viper55666 Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 Oh Viper, that's rough! are you still "friends" with her on FB? I'd suggest deleting the friendship. I think it's pretty low for her to un-tag herself, I mean, gosh - it was her wedding too! It's hard to say Why she would do that... maybe it is hurting her too? Maybe she's just trying to mess with your mind? I say, make distance and keep NC! Good Luck man! We're here for ya! No she deleted me from her friends list a while ago. Got a text all ready to send... stopping myself though... never had the heart to have a go... even though what shes done hurts like hell all the text says is 'I love you x' What a sad person i have become! Link to comment
Eleanor Rigby Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 This has to be the longest thread on the face of the internet, but I'm joining in. I've been no contact for 6 days now. But start day one right now on this forum. I think it should be fairly easy for me comparatively because my thing was a cyber/telephone "relationship". But damn.. even something that was not real to begin with sure hurts when it's ripped out from underneath you doesn't it? I have not checked the yahoo account he has to see if i have offline messages waiting. I have not called. I have stopped looking for him online. I hope i can keep this going and shake this off in a short amount of time because honestly it's not even worth the mental drama. I've never even met the guy! *waves* hi everybody! Link to comment
Anon21 Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 No she deleted me from her friends list a while ago. Got a text all ready to send... stopping myself though... never had the heart to have a go... even though what shes done hurts like hell all the text says is 'I love you x' What a sad person i have become! Day 11 I've got an e-mail ready too. Mine is asking if she wants to go to the dog park with me, and about how I'm still thinking about her. Just trying not to send it because I know in my heart it'll just go ignored. This isn't getting any easier, what a bummer. Not much else to talk about today, I've been really tired lately, haven't had much drive to do anything. Edit: I'm an idiot. Went on her facebook, she seems so happy. I sent that freaking email to her. I know I'm just going to be let down. MY heart feels horrible. Breaking NC sucks. But it's okay, I'm not going to reset my days, that would only signify failure. I'm pressing on, either way. Link to comment
philove Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 Day - 22 It's the third night in a row now that I have I dreamt about my ex and the dreams are getting stranger and stranger, I won't go into the details but I'm determined not to let it get me down because for a change the sun is out in England! Link to comment
Viper55666 Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 Day 1 * * * * IT!!!!! No reply Link to comment
FAF Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 Ok I havent gotten in touch with her. feel a bit sick and alone...going to work with some brilliant people all day though so I'm optomistic! Link to comment
ToodlePip Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 How does it work if you reply to an email from them? I kept it short and brief, and am feeling reasonable ambivalent about a response ie. I didn't ask any quesions so no reason to get one. D i start counting from 1 again? Link to comment
Anon21 Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 How does it work if you reply to an email from them? I kept it short and brief, and am feeling reasonable ambivalent about a response ie. I didn't ask any quesions so no reason to get one. D i start counting from 1 again? Play by your rules. If you want to start over then start over. I should probably start over at day one, I sent my ex a short email, but starting at day one again wouldn't do any good for me, it would just make me feel worse. I'm just gonna keep telling myself that I've got it under control, we all make mistakes, sometimes just moving on and pretending they never happened is best. Link to comment
ToodlePip Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 I do feel like I shouldn't start over as I ws responding to her initiating contact. Kind of LC really. I gave it a few days to respond and really didn't give her anything, so I'm going to let myself off. 3 weeks now. Link to comment
Ixtapa Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 Ok...technically I didnt contact my ex 5 days ago....I merely commented on something he posted about a picture (on a common's friend's FB profile). So I will keep counting the days as if I had not contacted him......my goal being 90 days anyway (and not 30). Still asking myself a zillion questions about his behavior (why why why ??). When does it get better ??? Link to comment
Eleanor Rigby Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 Still going strong here.. I have not checked yahoo to see if he has messaged me.. but at times the urge is strong. I am still looking at the phone constantly to see if i have missed a call.. no checking online though. I need this to hurry and pass.. i hate feeling this way.. Link to comment
JohnGalt Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 Hope is a cruel thing. Day 3 After over a month of NC, my ex-fiance gets in touch with me. She invites me to a movie and we go to dinner. Great times. Everyone I told seems to think she's starting to realize that despite my mistake, I was a really great guy. Most of my friends think she wants me back. People commenting on my thread seem to think that I have a chance at reconciliation. I sent her a brief email on late Thursday night. It is now Saturday afternoon. She left to go to her parents on early Friday and got back late last night, but I only know this because my bro said she posted that on Facebook. Maybe she hasn't had time to respond?? Or Call?? All I know is that, I have hope now and so resuming NC is going to be all the more difficult. Link to comment
Eleanor Rigby Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 It sure does suck when they play with your head like that? Mine went icy/quiet on me for a week.. then called and talked for 2 hours, then went dead on me again. That stupid call had me all happy and hopeful that things were back they way they were before.. so all he did was hurt me further. I think you are right.. get back into NC.. Link to comment
JohnGalt Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 Yeah, it is hard to read anything into it so soon. She's probably obsessing over what to respond with. I'm probably just a little too hopeful and over-analyzing things. I have to relax. Reconciliation is slow anyways. Link to comment
Eleanor Rigby Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 grrr.. at this moment right now im having this overwhelming urge to check yahoo and see if he left a message for me.. I'm fighting it... It's hard.... This is like dieting!!! Link to comment
JuneBug Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 I realized I'm at a point where I think I'll be sad whichever way I decide to go. I realized that I don't want to move on because it's depressing to think that he'll become less and less a part of my life from here on out and my happiness will slowly make me forget about him. On the other hand it's depressing that I'm still sad about this. I realized that even if one day he decides to ask for me back...I'm not sure if I can trust him anymore. I'm not sure if my heart will be in it 100% and I'm not sure if things will ever be the way it was. I picture myself still hurt in the future even if we were together. Knowing this, I should be able to move on because it means that there really isn't a future for us because of what happened. At the same time, I still love him and miss being around him. I'm afraid of losing contact with him and being okay with that. I remember reading some post secret card that said something along the lines of "sadder than the day you left me is the day I realize I don't miss you anymore". I never understood that until now .=( I feel stuck. I wonder if knowing that we can't be together makes it ok for us to be friends earlier. It means when we hang out, I will not have any ulterior motives to get him back. But I don't know if I can ever stop loving the person he was in our old relationship. Can you be friends with someone you love because you realize that there is no future otherwise? I want to invite him to an event but I'm afraid to even ask... ahhh! Link to comment
LemonCheesecak Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 Day 7 Today is a big day for me for two reasons 1) I've made it a week, my longest so far! Now I'm gonna see if I can try for 2, 3, forever! 2) Although I'm not over my ex at all, I'm now comfortable saying yes, I AM single. The idea of getting back on the 'scene', talking to other girls, maybe having a few causal dates interests me greatly. I think it would only aid the healing process (there's life after the breakup etc). Although being a guy with very little self confidence (due to abusive relationships in the past coupled with no self-worth anyway) this is more a pipe dream than anything, but its nice to know I'm there now. Link to comment
_ash_ Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 Day 7 Today is a big day for me for two reasons 1) I've made it a week, my longest so far! Now I'm gonna see if I can try for 2, 3, forever! 2) Although I'm not over my ex at all, I'm now comfortable saying yes, I AM single. The idea of getting back on the 'scene', talking to other girls, maybe having a few causal dates interests me greatly. I think it would only aid the healing process (there's life after the breakup etc). Although being a guy with very little self confidence (due to abusive relationships in the past coupled with no self-worth anyway) this is more a pipe dream than anything, but its nice to know I'm there now. thats great! i wish i could get out of the house more often and just have fun! but idk being at home watching tv with the ex for a year and ahalf has made me hate going out! ahhhh but im doing it tonight, going to the hookah bar with one of my friends, maybe this is a good day to bring out the sexy clothes haha Link to comment
LemonCheesecak Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 thats great! i wish i could get out of the house more often and just have fun! but idk being at home watching tv with the ex for a year and ahalf has made me hate going out! ahhhh but im doing it tonight, going to the hookah bar with one of my friends, maybe this is a good day to bring out the sexy clothes haha Go for it! Just try and have an enjoyable, relaxed night. I think all of us on ENA deserve that at least. That's what we did last night, went to the kind of club we'd NEVER have gone to before just for a laugh, ended up having a great time and sober too. I think that's what set me up for my revelation today. But I know the feeling of preferring to stay in etc, I certainly couldn't go out every night Link to comment
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