MNmike Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 day 28 A little better today, at least. Link to comment
samantha20 Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 I just got back from djing. A part of me almost expected her to turn up at the club to see me as she knew I was working and we haven't spoken for nearly a week. She didn't though.. I know I shouldn't want her to. Thanks for your suppoert mcr7 if it was aimed at me. This is so hard. When I was djing people kept requesting sugababes 'about you now' which really reminds me of my ex and my breakup because of the lyrics and also because it was in the charts around the time we got back together after she dumped me the first time. It was also playing on tv new year's eve when she dumped me again. I couldn't avoid playing it in the end though even though I really didn't want to and I nearly cried. There's so many songs that remind me of her. It kills me to hear any of them now. Songs we had, films we watched together, our favourite foods that we ate together, places we went.. they all break my heart now. Link to comment
remainstrong Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 Day 19. Cured.... i think so, who knows. No Desire, want or need to get in contact with Ex, the longer the time goes the more my what i thought was undying love now transpires to I must have just been brain washing myself as i can see what everyone else could see months ago clear as day.. What also is becoming aparant is i have a massive miss trust of females all because of the games she played with me. I hope over time this fades. I am still seeing a girl i met 10 days or so ago and thats gouing really well. Link to comment
batteredandlost Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 I think my AD's are finally kicking in. My tunnel is certainly seeming a little less bleak. I desperately want to tell him, but I need to give him space. Because of the depression, I've been weird. Hard for me to admit or accept really, but I hope he can understand in time. Another day to get through without my best friend. It sucks. Link to comment
batteredandlost Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 I'm not doing this anymore. He emailed me, and I've replied. We never officially broke up, he never said "This is over" - and neither did I. We've both been going through a bad patch and ignoring him certainly won't help either of us. So I'm out again. I'm going to fight for my man. Sorry! Link to comment
LilBear Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 it is now...day 5 and i've changed my number peace...he cannot get to me to hurt me Link to comment
samantha20 Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 can't believe i'm on day 6. I'm feeling quite calm at the moment. I think it's because I'm too tired to think. Link to comment
samantha20 Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 she text me tonight saying 'hey. how was work last night? busy? RU ok? up to anything much atm? I've got accounting exam tomorrow. Let me know how ur doin. x' I don't know if she misses me as a friend, misses me as a gf (doubtful i guess) or wants an ego boost by finding out if I miss her or whatever. I feel mean not replying to wish her good luck for her exam.. I dont wanna go back to the start though. What do you think she wants? I don't know if it's the nc but I'm feeling not too bad today. I've been dithering about whether to meet up with this french guy that asked for my number. I was having doubts like no one will compare to my ex.. But they don't need to. I don't have to fall in love again. It beats sitting around on my own.. I've been secretly hoping my ex would contact me all week. Now she has it's harder because I don't wanna be rude or look like I'm playing games by ignoring her Link to comment
NorthDallas40 Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 Samantha - keep up the NC. It's already made your attitude better, and will continue to do so. And as far as what she thinks about you, with all that your ex has selfishly done to you thus far, you don't need to worry AT ALL about seeming "mean." She didn't want to keep up relationship, so she doesn't deserve to have your attention anymore. Meanwhile, I broke NC myself this morning because my ex left me a sober voicemail at a decent hour this past Monday, instead of her usual 3am drunken texts/calls on the weekend, which I have religiously ignored. I sent her a very brief & cordial Myspace message acknowledging her call, but not indicating anything about how I felt about her. Within 5 minutes she had posted the Rolling Stones "Miss You" video and song on her Myspace page. Nice sentiment, and I know it was for me, but that's all it was. A gesture. Link to comment
deleted-account Posted January 24, 2008 Share Posted January 24, 2008 Samantha, you're doing great at the NC... keep it up. Your ex contacting you shows you that she has been thinking about you all week, so don't worry about that. By ignoring her you are not playing games, you are putting yourself first. It would be playing games if you pretended like you could be friends with her. She will contact you again... right now is too soon to get back in contact. Link to comment
Shaemus Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 I agree, Samantha. I get the feeling you were the giver in your relationship, and she the taker. And it looks to me like she's just itching to get her next fix of take. Of course I've been wrong before... Myself, I'm back to day 2... two days ago, I had to see the ex. My wristwatch was at her place. It's not quite the watch from Pulp Fiction... but it's the only thing I've ever given myself that I didn't make. She put on a waterworks show, and invited me up to see the cat I'd taken in while we were together. She kept her when we split. She said she wanted to be friends, or friendly... I can see now that it would have just been harmful to all of us. There's a reason we've split up, and it's because we couldn't cooperate towards mutual goals. S Link to comment
lovemeorleaveme00 Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Its my day 30..second round.Took a break xmas and now Im going for the next 30!I feel good.I still think about him but with the NC it feels like its been a long time ago..a long long time ago..The memories are even fading.. Link to comment
Crows Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Day 3. Dinner on monday night. And yet again.. she has disappeared after we got closer once again. Strategy on her part? Link to comment
deleted-account Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Day 3. Dinner on monday night. And yet again.. she has disappeared after we got closer once again. Strategy on her part? I don't think she's working any strategy. I think she's just clueless on what she wants so she goes back and forth. Link to comment
LE DHUY NHUT Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Hey I hope you can stay strong....you're doing good,it feels much better when you get control back.I've been in strict NC since December 4,2007.I know it's hard at first but eventually you'll be glad when you are finally free. Link to comment
samantha20 Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 thanks so much for the support guys. She text me again this morning. It was weird because I was actually dreaming about another woman!! and then she text me and woke me up. She basically said 'how are you? my exam went really badly, will be lucky if i scraped 15%!!' I'm not sure what she wants from me! Like shaemus said I think she wants to take. I've got a feeling she wants me to ask her to meet up.. she will be bored tonight because her bf will be at work. she's unaware that I've gone back to my parents place. I don't want her to know because I don't want her to think I can't handle being in town. I don't know why i feel so guilty about not replying to her after everything she's done to me. I feel bad acting like i don't care about her exam because i do care how she's doing. I can't believe I've made it to day 7 though.. and I do feel a lot less anxious. If I just said something short and polite like 'i'm fine thankyou, sorry your exam went badly' would that ruin everything? It's not that I'm desperate to talk to her, I just want to be nice! do you think she's reaching out for friendship? or something else? she confuses me... Link to comment
LE DHUY NHUT Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Trust me,you have to stay in 100 percent NO CONTACT,your being nice will only hurt you.If she wants something more than friendship she can E mail you or something but don't respond because you think she might. Link to comment
LilBear Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Day 6 of no contact Today is also the 3rd day of using my new cell phone number. Everything is quiet. My guess is that he doesn't know I've changed my number. Yet. It feels weird to have a new number. I feel liberated from all the hurt he's been causing. I feel strong for having put my foot down on all the misleading nonsense that I've been subjected to. But also do feel sad at the same time. Link to comment
Crows Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 Day 4 ended.. she came online and messages me. Asked how i was.. said she was at work, then disappeared. Sigh............... what will happen next. Link to comment
nikkers04 Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 Day 6 kinda.... Saw him last sunday and we talked about some things. Haven't heard from him except for an email on wednesday asking about some mutual friends of ours No hello how are yous strictly to the point with them. UGH we have been a part for almost 3 weeks now....I miss him soooo much Link to comment
hueman84 Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 I dont remember the day, but I was in NC for 3 months...then I broke NC for like 2 weeks...realized it was a mistake and went NC again. Started dating another girl like almost 2 month ago. We are still together and doing fine. The ex still crosses my mind here and there, but I know I will never talk to her again. Link to comment
samantha20 Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 day 8.. went on a date last night. It went really well and I thought he was nice and funny. I felt a bit weird when we went back to his though. He started kissing me and stuff and I just wanted to go home suddenly. I'm not sure if it's because it was too soon for a first date or if it's because I'm still in love with my ex I also got a bit sad because he suggested watching a dvd and the 2 he suggested were two that reminded me of my ex. one was 'Babel' which we watched on our amazing trip to australia together, in an open air cinema under the stars in darwin, and the other one was 'closer' which we watched snuggled up on her sofa and decided that the blower's daughter song would be ours. So he drove me home and I haven't heard from him today.. I text him saying 'did u have fun last night?' but he didn't reply. He said last night that he wanted to see me again so I'm a bit confused.. I was feeling a lot better with nc when I was on the date and stuff, but I'm feeling a bit down again tonight because I'm sitting around on my own again. My ex text me last night asking me what I've been up to and i replied with a short 'I'm out at the moment.' She didn't reply. I guess that counts as breaking nc? Just didn't want her to think I was sitting home alone or whatever. I'm worried about going back to town again on monday because its so much harder to maintain nc when I'm in the same town as her.. Link to comment
foleno Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 Today is Day 30 for me. Yay! Love you guys, couldn't have made it through without your support. I still don't feel over my ex. But I do feel a lot better and I don't feel nearly as tempted to get in touch with her anymore. Hope I can keep my chin up and continue to move on. I'll try to do everyone here proud. Hey thats great. NC works if you work it, I know what you mean about not being totally over them. Link to comment
foleno Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 I reach day 30 again, Feeling odd. Had a very strong dream with her. I have had some powerful dreams before; like guessing winning lottary number, but ya I have had plenty of silly means nothing dreams. I really have to let go.. I am doing NC, but MIGHT GIVE IN IF THESE feelings continue. Link to comment
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