Are we ever going to see Eye to Eye

[mlchildr]

Okay so my boyfriend and I have been together for 6 years. We broke up two years ago for a year and finally got back together after a year of total chaos. He would date other girls and then run back to me and then run back to them. I allowed him to do this but then I finally put a stop to it because it was hurting me soo much. We went a good six months with no contact and basically I had just moved on. He called me up near christmas ( at the time he had a girl living with him) and said she was moving out he was done and wanted to get back with me. The only thing was he wanted to get back together but was also seeing the ex that moved out. I found out about it and said no more. Finally we got back together everything was great for a year but this past year has been hell. We fight constantly about everything. He lies about the littlest stuff all the time. Last weekend the weekend before christmas we had plans to finish christmas shopping and spend some time togther. Then out of the blue he tells me he is going away for the weekend with his buddies. Yesterday his boss's girlfriend had a baby in which we are all good friends. We planned on going to the hospital to see them lasr night after we both got off work. He got off work before me and went to the hospital right then. DOes it eeven occur to him that he made plans with me to go together and couldn't wait an hour for me. He thinks it is no big deal but I would never do that. It seems as if he has no respect or consideration for me. He bought me an engagement ring but i told him that we needed to get our relationship right and stop the arguing before I would get engaged to him. I just don't know what to do anymore...I'm tired of trying with someone when it seems like there is alway s something...

[smiles21]

Oh boy, sounds like we have a winner here. Hun, not sure exactly why you are staying with this man. He doesn’t treat you well it seems, and it looks like you keep taking him back. It seems he will never change for good, and doesn’t respect how you feel at times. I would really re-evaluate if you want to be married.. (maybe not even in this relationship). He sounds emotionally abusive. I would really sit down and talk with him about everything and put everything on the table.. Seems like you deserve better hun.

[colors]

He thinks it is no big deal but I would never do that. It seems as if he has no respect or consideration for me. He bought me an engagement ring but i told him that we needed to get our relationship right and stop the arguing before I would get engaged to him. I just don't know what to do anymore...I'm tired of trying with someone when it seems like there is alway s something...

 

Hi there Mlchildr

I'm sorry you're going through this. It's hard, I've been through a relationship very similar to yours. I got tired of it as well, I wished with all my heart it would have worked, but reality said otherwise, just like your relationship...there is ALWAYS something.

 

Lies, lack of consideration, other women....hun, it's been 6 years. If you aren't seeing eye to eye yet, I don't think you ever will. I have to say, you were VERY wise not to accept the ring. Because He's not going to change who he is. And you need things to change, because you are tired of this.

 

Little things, like not thinking of you & waiting for you to go to the hosipital together.....that will drive you crazy in another 6 years. But that will won't change, because like you said, he didn't see anything wrong with it...that's who he is! You well, you are a more considerate women & didn't appreciate that.Understandably so.

 

Maybe he's just not the right man for you. which is why it seems like there is Always something standing in the way of the relationship. The way I see it is...He doesn't love you the way you Want to be loved, he doesn't treat you the way you would like to be treated. And he never will. I think you should stop trying with him, and search the world out...because I believe that there is someone better for you, someone who will love you for who you are, adore you & be more thoughtful...someone more suited for you.

 

You've given this MANY attempts, maybe now is the time to draw the line & accept that it hasn't worked & never will. You just see & want things differently and no amount of trying will change that.

I wish you happiness!