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Aida2

By Aida2
in Sex and Romance

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Aida2 Enthusiast

Aida2

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I got the last two posts just a little too late…

It wasn’t like a gang fight, just lots of people wanting to see a fight... she didn’t really hurt me either, just a little bit...

Ok, start from beginning.

I went to meet her after college and took two of my friends with me, she had two of her friends with her, and then a whole load of people from the school who we both knew and who had heard what was going to happen were also there.

One of my friends took over the video to show her and she watched it then she looked really upset, so I went over too with my other friend and she asked me if he really had sent me the video so I told her yes. She asked if what he had told her was true (I assumed she meant that I had slept with him) but that I had ended it and there was no way I wanted him back because of all the things he had done and I didn’t intend to split them up but I did suggest that keep away too because the video wasn’t the only thing he had done. That’s when she got really annoyed with me and threw my phone accross the park, that’s also when she shoved me backwards so I fell over and when he turned up.

This is the really weird bit… I’m so confused now…

He kind of pulled me back up again and stood in front of me and told his GF that she wasn’t going to hurt me then he told her to go home… When she didn’t move I left because I was going to cry if I didn’t and just let me go...

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Aida2 Enthusiast

Aida2

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He didn’t try and follow me or stop me, he hasn’t called… I feel so awful right now, I really want him to try and contact me or something but he hasn’t and I don’t know why and I want him to.

 

"Also have you been talking to him if you have then is back in power just where he likes being"

 

No, I havent spoken to him at all, not even today.

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Spugly Fuglet Mentor

Spugly Fuglet

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But he helped me up, he protected me... what if he let me go without a fight because he finally gave up on me and its only now that I really want him...

 

Its down to power, "But he helped me up, he protected me" from some thing HE SET UP!,

 

He told every one!,

He know his GF would find out!

He sent you the video!

He set her up for the Meeting!

He was there the who time and waited until a fight he know would happon!

He could have stopped this way befor then!

He got a lode of cool back becouse he protected you so now his egos back as every can see 2 girls fighting over him and hes helped you so "hay she dummped me but look how cool i am and hay girls do this kind of thing all the time over me!"

 

please tell me you see who this guy has played you two!

 

This guy has not dropped a beat, hes been playing you two all along and POW one cat fight latter hes got all he could ever wont, his GF fighting for him and you all begging for him back. In other words his cake and eating it.

 

Dont ever forget ALL this started with this guy, sex with you behind his GF back means hes a cheater, sending you the Vid SICK!!!, telling EVRY one SICKKKER

 

Now hes back, one small play act of "MR NICE GUY" and its just as befor with his GF and you after him

 

unless you dont FALL FOR HIS ****, unless you kepp NC going on him and keep him out O>U>T!

let this guy back, let him get power over you again and you will be in a world of pain, Games and more games, he will sleep around and send vids of you to hes new girls get the picher, if you go with this guy DAY AND NIGHT you will be paranoude, alwasy thinking "is he chating on me?".

 

get the idear, this guy has to find in him selfs more than just a wait and stand in front of his gf move he has to grow up BIG TIME!

 

So whats it to be, banting for the big strong guy and his brave one move of faceing down a girl after setting this hole thing up and making him self look cool infront of well? every one you know.

 

Or

 

Blowing this manipulating, cerniving cheating creep out of the water and out fo your life for good, and not living in dreed hes playing around the rest of your life.

 

Your not a child any more and we are still porwd of you, you handed that meeting well

Now its time to grow up some more Adia2 and make that call on whats it to be powerless or power, I can not help you on this, what every you deside do it as a grown up and face what ever comes, this is your life and only you can live it.

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Spugly Fuglet Mentor

Spugly Fuglet

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He has been asking people if they know how I am...

 

hes asking people who he knows will come back and tell you hes been asking, why would he need to ask more than one? if not to let you know hes asking by making a big act of acking every one, hes still playing games with you.

 

 

hes still with his GF remember and still did all that cheating, lieing and on and on.

 

I really think hes getting his lines from a soup of TV, come on this could be of Corre or Misrabull-enders

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Spugly Fuglet Mentor

Spugly Fuglet

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So hes dumped her

 

After you showed her the Vid some how thats a bit late, like Carne says

he dumped her 1st to save face, he should have done that a long time ago like Befor starting any thing with you say.

 

They guys all bout face and how he looks, hes just getting it now that his games coming undone.

 

Look, I know deep deep down you wont to think this guys a good guy, but remember all he has done, hes not going to change over night.

 

Hes going to keep trying and keep trying to get that power over you back,

he will come from the sides and any way he can. But nothing he has done makes me think hes any thing but a scum bag.

 

But its your life and thats only my point of view.

 

I would have that talk with your mum now and see what she says.

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Spugly Fuglet Mentor

Spugly Fuglet

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Adia2 So far you have done every thing right in my book, you sent every thing back, you met his x gf which was a hard thing to do like that and handed it very well. Your keeping up NC and have got on with your life.

 

With your mum you don't have the full back story, but I would in passing ask her what she thinks of this guy. Just ask her what her feelings are of him, and what she thinks if you to started dateing.

 

Then at some point if you feel the need ask you mum about your story here, you don't have to say its yours, the clasic "I have this freand who" or "I read this on the web what do you think" gives you a chance to sound him out with some on who knows you two.

 

The future:

 

If this guy has now dumped his gf, and your thinking of making a move, even ofter all he has done. I will not condem him as life's about larning your NC hit him hard and in the right place to shape and make him reliz that is actions where wrong.

 

I get the feeling that you have feelings that you won't to act on. For now all I can add is,

wait and see, wait and see if he stays single even with your NC going and that his X-gf is going to stay just the his X. Just for a short time, then if you do let I'm back into your life don't go running into his bed, wait and see how he acts, he's got a hell of a lot of trust to biuld back up with you and the moment he starts disrespecting you again let him know you will walk, and do NC all the way.

 

After a good amount of time, have a good hard look at him and how he's been and make a call then on going back out with him. Time is on your side here so I would say don't rush things.

 

I know many reading this will be scraming "no no no" but I have to say men do larn, it takes hard hits to get through our thick heads but we do and that means we can change.

 

but also many woman fall into the trap of thinking a bad guy will change for them becouse there love is difarent only to be shocked when he's just as he's aways been.

 

But this lad is just starting out, and what you have done may just have been what was needed to wake him up and make him start to think about his action and how they impact the feelings of others.

 

Some of the things he has done are so wrong, but if he has had a relization of that fact, then there is hope.

 

In the end its your call, you know him best and you know what you wont from life.

 

Keep NC or not its up to you.

 

so far you have done grate been strong, made a stand and shaped your own life aways remember that, you pulled your self out of a very bad place to where you are now, in controll and free to make your own mind up.

 

Adia2 you will be one of lifes winners if you keep this up.

 

good luck and let us know how things go.

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Aida2 Enthusiast

Aida2

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So you think I could maybe see him again in a few months? As long as he knew I wasnt taking any of his crap again...

No one is telling him anything. He is still asking about me but everyone is refusing to tell him anything and people have told me he is getting really upset...

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Spugly Fuglet Mentor

Spugly Fuglet

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What I'm saying adia2 is, its what to early to make a call on seeing him again, your to close to the events, give it time lost of time, I feel running head long back to him becouse he's feeling bad will just put you back where you started.

 

He's getting up set becouse he need to "feel" the consequens of his actions, befor he can move on to being a better man the is a world of pain he must walk throw, its the only way he will larn, that cheating, acting like a pimp, making a 16 year old you sex toy, sending videos of him self and a girl who trusts and loves him to another, spreding rumors and genrilay acting like a selfish spuled creep as a very very big price.

 

Adia2 this is the real point, this guy if he had got away with this would have carred on, many other girls would have come into his reach and as he has form for being disrespectfull, uncaring, manipulatve and hartfull to get hks end away, he would have done the same to them that he did to you and his new x,

 

In what you have done in ending his games could just have saved all thows other girls and woman from the same fate.

 

I know you have feelings for this guy, all I'm saying is don't act on them yet. wait and see how you feel later and see what he dos next. You need to see what he dos next, when you really love some one you don't "get over them start away" it can take years so if he really cares he will for some time, but that's not the point the point is he now had to prove with out you being there to manipulate that he has changed. With NC you look on and see what he dos next, don't for get he's getting blanked by evey one becouse "he" told every one. You on the other hand had far more respect for your self, him and his X.

 

your a better human being then he will ever be. So may be you should think about dating some one on your level.

As for him he may get there one day but today is not that day, until then say away.

 

But as I have said its your call, we can only say what we feel ofter years of ower own pain and hart brake, this guy is not the only creep around there are men and woman he treat the good and kind like dart, and there are the bad calls you make in life, the moments of madness the can humiliat the ones you love.

 

Always remember this you did the right thing for the right resions.

 

so time NC and time see what he dos next and don't close your life off to better guys who may come along.

 

spugly

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Spugly Fuglet Mentor

Spugly Fuglet

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Its all down to what he dos and giveing you time to see all this start, sorry thats not really the point the point is he has to change and you can only know if he has by seeing what he dos. Hes words or empty as thows are what he used to manipulat you two from the start. Look to see what he dos next and see how he acts.

 

But think 1st befor letting this guy any where near you again, he has to really show you he has changed for the better not just wont a quick fix.

 

We are not talking days here or weeks, mouths that's what you need a strech of time to see if he's seen the light.

 

In the end its your call, you know him and even more inpoartent you know yourself.

 

One more thing, there is one thing you should look for if you do brake NC that is him trying to give you back all the julirey. If he dos what's saying is "I owned you once, I own you again" never exsept the julirey and things he gave you befor and thing about what he's trying to do to you. The moment he starts to disrespect you pull him up and keep an eye out for girls he's spending time with, you don't won't to be the GF in his next video.

 

Also if he's really a **** he will get you back them dump you so he looks good again, that's one act that will show you he's no good if that happons think your self lucky he's out of your life.

 

that's my advice

wait and see and them make a call on what you won't to do next,

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CarnelianButterfly Veteran

CarnelianButterfly

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I would say you can shouldn't do anything serious beside just seeing if he's still a jerk for a several months. Maintain strict NC for at least 3-4 months. Even then it should be talking as a acquaintance or someone you don't really know. I frankly don't think you should ever get more serious than that with him even in a year. He's poison. Look at how he's mistreated you. A few nice words from time to time or when you ended it aren't enough to cover up the fact that he has disrespected you and treated you like a sex toy.

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JimmerJammer Collaborator

JimmerJammer

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I think this post is a pretty good indication of what sex and emotions can do to a girl. Obviously the logical thing is to break away and leave, but come on that's easier said than done when you feel a close connection with someone. This guy tried having multiple girls to have sex with, one that was his gf and the other that he could have as his young tart.

 

Would I be off if I said you really cared for this man? I get the feeling that is the case. To some degree he was right thinking that it was low that you showed the vid, but it was also low of him to SHARE the vid. Then again he knew what could happen as a result of his actions and sure while he wanted to save face I'm also betting that it gave him a way in, so that it could look like even though he messed up with his gf that he respected that he shouldn't be with her anymore and looked big by doing the right thing and breaking up with her.

 

Between the dialogue that took place in your last post, it seems to me that you wanted to be his gf too and he called you on it. It also strikes me that he could get the feeling that you want to repair what happened and that if she comes around that you can still be a part of the picture. I get the feeling that if she does come around and takes him back(I'm not happy or encouraging what you've done, but if you get rid of her and promise there'll be no others I want to work this out....etc) which sounds to me that if something like that does happen, I doubt she'll want you around him and he'll have to be even more cold and distant if his plan is to see you behind her back.

 

Its pretty obvious to me that he feels he has you as his responses don't give you what you want to hear and yet you go back asking for the same answer! He knows he has you and now he can play with your emotions for a bit because I'm sure he's mad over what happened. I'm betting that if he tries to smooth talk his way that he will do his best to make himself look good by finding a way to excuse himself over what took place.

 

I understand your attachment to this guy even after everything that has taken place, but he also is very good at dealing with women's emotions and it seems that because of that, making the decision to leave will no doubt cause pain and emptiness.

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