if you have been raped before please read and help me

[steff]

hey guys, i know i havent been on here for nearly a year, only because i moved out and didnt have the internet. here is my story.

 

i worked at a restraunte, and in april of this year this one large family came in, and there was this thing between one of the young men and me. at the end of the night, i was given a tip and their number, and asked for mine, we had developed a great friendship in such a short time, and with a mobile number u cant really be traced.

 

anyway, months went by, and i got this phone call from the 'mum' anagha, asking to come to dinner, there had been many invertations, which i had turned down, but anyway i decided to go, as my current (at the time) boyfriend had just cheated on me. so i went, and james and i really hit it off, he was a fantastic guy. two weeks later i was hospitalised from getting an std for my then ex boyfriend (one who cheated on me) and was in there for a few days on morphine, i was then taken back to james' place and they looked after me for a few days.

 

anyway, so we had a great relationship, myself and the whole family. i trusted each and everyone of them.

 

two weeks ago, anagha broke up with her partner, and he came to me looking for a place to crash the night, i had no problems with that nothing made me think i should be worried or turn him away. so after i finished worked, we had dinner at my work, and went home, around 1am after a movie, i started crying over my late grandmother, he started comforting me, and around 1:30 suggested i get sleep and he would wait till i go to sleep before moving to the couch.

 

hopped into bed, and started to drift of to sleep, only to wake to his hands gropping my breast and touching me all over, i frooze i didnt know what to do, so i rolled over to face away from him, so he started touching my bottom, and saying things like "why dont you lie naked next to me" and "where are the codoms" over and over again, i couldnt believe this was happening, this was my ex (james and i broke up) boyfriends foster dad (james is a foster child) i couldnt move i couldnt speak, and then he raped me from behind..... i got really angry, and i finally was able to speak and told him to get the * * * * out of my house. he was like "omg what have i done?" "we need to talk" "i didnt mean to hurt you" he left and i called the police, and was taken to hospital. when the police dropped me back home my best mate came up, and we started ringing people up to say i cant come to work or uni and things, then called my sister, who came straight from work and she called my parents who were in the uk at the time.

 

i was taken to the police station and had a 5 hour statement, then taken to a different hospital, on suicide watch for two days then trasfered to a psych ward and stayed for 2 weeks on suicide watch again, have only just gotten home, which is now my parents place.

 

i feel like he has taken me and i am just a walking thing with no sole or heart. please anyone who has been through this or knows something about it help me get through this, i cant see the light at the end of the tunnel

 

stef

[Phoenix69]

You will get through this, especially as you have pressed charges.

 

I was number 7 in a serial rapists little adventure. The only reason he was stopped was me going to the cops and reporting the incident. It was tough, I had to go to court and testify against him. Plus deal with all the crap that comes with being raped. It has been 4 years since the incident. And my current BF is still the only guy I have been with since.

 

I sympathise with you completely and although it doesn't seem like it now, these fears and worries do dwindle with time. Not neceesarily leave you all together, but it does get better...

[confused1607307483]

i'm so sorry for your pain. i was raped by my ex-bf and ex-best friend... you're a strong woman just for going to the police. it took me months before i ever went. one thing i'll recommend is that you don't broadcast the news to everyone you meet - keep it at a select few. and read lots... i loved the book "beauty restored" by Me Ra Kah.

 

BEST OF PRAYERS AND LUCK