nadine_3110 Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 Ok my bf and I have been dating for almost six months. He has given me oral sex once, it wasn't as amazing as I thought it would be, but then again he has never done it to anyone before. I asked him if he could do it again, but he says that it's kinda gross for him and he doesn't like doing it. Does anyone (guys or girls) know why he won't, or how I can convince him to do it, it's not like I want it all the time, just more than once. And he can't get better at it if he doesn't even try right? Link to comment
melrich Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 Does anyone (guys or girls) know why he won't, My guess is that he is telling you the truth...he didn't like it. I can understand that if it was his first time, it can be pretty confronting and is something I think you definitely get better at and more comfortable with experience. How can you convince him? Well you probably have to talk about it with him some more, find out what he didn't like then work some ideas around that (taste/use food, smell/use scent, uncomfortable/try other positions). Remind him that most people don't like oysters the first time they try them. Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 If he doesn't like it then he doesn't like it. I am sure there are books out there on how to make oral sex more appealing to the man but in the end, you have to respect his feelings. Link to comment
CrossCheck75 Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 Unfortunately, for you, I think it's more of an inherent preference than an acquired taste. Some of us live for it and, speaking very candidly, have enjoyed it since we were first sexually active as teens. You can encourage him to continue and hope for the best, but somehow I suppose it woud lose some of its appeal for you if you knew he approached it as a chore rather than a priviledge... In terms of cultural inclination, I've heard of cunnilingus loosely referred to as a "white boy" thing... I guess my lady is luckier than most =) Link to comment
nadine_3110 Posted October 18, 2006 Author Share Posted October 18, 2006 I know I have to respect his wishes but I give him oral sex, it scared the hell out of me the first time but I knew that he enjoyed it so I kept at it and read stuff to get better at it. But it just seems like he won't make the effort to do the same for me. Link to comment
RileyRedleg05 Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 Simply put...if he doesn't like doing it, nothing is really going to cause him to suddenly think...hey, "I like oral." However, I might suggest the idea an incentive? Possibly a quid pro quo arrangement. Use "pro" words to get him to do it. Tell him how it makes you feel, how you enjoy it. However, you have to take several things into consideration, 1) Is this the farthest you have gone physically? If so, then this might be awkward for him because of the undiscovered territory. 2) If this isn't...then...again...just remember, he just might not like it, and incentives have to be inplace. He thinks its gross?...dont think me rude, but are you shaven? It might help...? My girlfriend once bought something called "head" gel. Its a flavored gel that you can use as 'flavor." And does help decrease any taste/smell/ etc... Lastly...if you don't enjoy it...why encourage him to do it more? And yes...he can't get better unless you know exactly what you want with it. thereforeeee...keep in mind, when he doesn't make you go wild through process of trial and error...anything and everything you say during each attempt, will either encourage him more to try harder...or just make him dislike it even more. Link to comment
shikashika Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 these are some good points. I really think this is something that DOES get better with time... are you the only girl he has done it with... that may be so. you said it wasn't that great for you... maybe he is scared about pleasing you. Encourage him when it gets even slightly tingly. and i would say WAXED rather than shaved, much smoother ! personal cleanliness is a must for good oral! Link to comment
CrossCheck75 Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 Napoleon is quoted in a letter sent to his lovely Josephine: "I will be home in three days... do not wash!" The afforementioned prescriptions of shaving, use of gels, blah blah, may further enable his tolerance, but don't expect anyone who dubs it "gross" to develop much of a taste for it. Personally, I'm with Napoleon. Flavor and scent are nothing the true aficianado would seek to minimize. I'll quit while I'm ahead here... Link to comment
nadine_3110 Posted October 18, 2006 Author Share Posted October 18, 2006 Well it wasn't great when he did it, but keep in mind that I had never experienced it (he's my first bf) and he had never done it. So I read somewhere that it makes it more pleasurable if he licks, sucks, flicks, something along those lines. So I suggested it to him once (via text message) and he didn't reply. And to answer your question Riley, I do shave. And I guess I could try those flavor things. Oh and I waxed my legs once, that hurt like nothing I've felt before, so not sure I wanna do that just now. Link to comment
NeverMore Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 I have heard that its kind of an aquired taste for guys. They might think its nasty the first few times, but soon they want to do it again and again... Just what I've heard though. Link to comment
Lady Bugg Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 Few questions: What was your reaction to him doing it? Did you moan? Did you make any noise? Some guys get more excited if they know YOU are excited....... That said....personally it's a turn off for me if a guy finds performing oral sex as "gross". Yes, it is a personal preferance..but if a guy considered going down on ME "gross"...I would consider another b/f...who WANTED to please me. That's just me though.... Link to comment
melrich Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 They might think its nasty the first few times, but soon they want to do it again and again... Yes I think that is a pretty common experience. Link to comment
nadine_3110 Posted October 18, 2006 Author Share Posted October 18, 2006 Of course I made noises, I was happy that he finally decided to go down on me. He told me that he doesn't like it that his nose is in there, he doesn't like the taste that much and it was hairy a bit. The first time he went down, I hadn't shaved in a few days so it was a bit hairy. He didn't say it was 'gross', I asked if it was and he said he didn't like it very much. He does please me by the way, just not with oral but that's why I posted this, to get help on why and how I can get him to. And it's not like he tastes great, I do it cus I want to please him, and I enjoy it when he's pleased. Link to comment
Lady Bugg Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 Well...he's young..so perhaps he will aquire a "taste" for it. I am not sure there's anything you can DO per say...to make him want to do it more...except let him know how much you enjoy him doing it. Link to comment
DN Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 Did you tell him that you didn't enjoy it very much? Link to comment
nadine_3110 Posted October 18, 2006 Author Share Posted October 18, 2006 Did you tell him that you didn't enjoy it very much? No I didn't tell him that. That would make him not want to do it again even more than he already doesn't want to do it. Link to comment
CrossCheck75 Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 I think DN may have been challenging you to think outside of the box and challenge him, indirectly, to try again. Maybe his testicular fortitude and competitive nature as a young man will surface afterall... Another go at it might be satisfying enough for you to begin demanding it from him... Link to comment
SkylinesTurnstiles Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 Well yeah i think you gotta respect his wishes he just may hate the idea of going down on someone visa verca have you done it to him and if so did he like it? Link to comment
nadine_3110 Posted October 18, 2006 Author Share Posted October 18, 2006 I've been doing it to him for about 3 months. From what I can see and what he tells me, he likes it a lot. So that's not really a problem. Link to comment
Rabican Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 I like it, but I have friends who are like EEHHHHH no way! A friend of mine has been with like 200+ girls, or some crazy amount like that, and has only done it to one or two girls.... hes not crazy about it. I like doing it to my girl because she seems to enjoy it. It turns me on seeing her turned on. That said, I can see why some guys may not like it, smell, taste, hair.... all things that can make a guy say... ah thats not for me. If you are going to ask him to do it make sure you are nice and clean, right out of the shower preferably, that way he knows theres no surprises down there. (not that there should be, or that he may be worrying about it, but its nice to know your girl is clean, just one less thing to think about). If he truly doesnt like it, you may have to just deal with that and realize that you wont get it often, if at all. Or you could always say, hey if Im not getting any down there action, neither are you. Trust me guys love head, so that may change his mind. Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now