Stick around or not?

[hennypenny3288]

If you were dating a guy who admitted that he wasn't that into you and didnt see you as a girlfriend, but liked hanging out with you, would you stay with the situation and milk it for what it's worth, until the very end (like stay for the sex, companionship, etc., for as long as possible)? Or would you just end it right then and there and walk away?

 

Why or why not? If you milk it out, you can also be looking for someone else too. Besides, it is not YOU who don't have the feelings for him, but HE who don't have the feelings for ya.

[Closure]

If I was dating a guy i'd say oh my god i'm gay!

 

Hehe

 

Anyway, walk away now, do not look back, ever, if he catches you up, run away, fast!

[BornToResist]

No way would I stay.

 

If he's not serious about me, then hit the road jack. I'm not about to waste my time.

[WorkNProgress]

Why should you settle for less? Is your time and self not valuable? If you stick with this person you may be passing up golden opportunities.

 

Remember when one door closes another opens.

[shorty20]

it would be wasting your time to stay. Especially if he was up front and told you about it, I would get out of it. You deserve to be treated better and no boyfriend is better than a bad, emotionally draining relationship.

[SeaBisquit]

I would keep him as a friend. but chances are he is just using you in some aspect or another. To me when they say your not gf material it means they don't care about you.

[Closure]

I would keep him as a friend. but chances are he is just using you in some aspect or another. To me when they say your not gf material it means they don't care about you.

 

Not to mention DAMN RIGHT DISRESPECTFUL!

[sparkle1]

However, heard the expression - "when you're single there is never anyone about? when you're with someone you're fighting them off"?

 

If i had feelings for him, which he didn't return...i would run for the hills. If i didn't have feelings for him, and just enjoy knowin he's about for sex, good time etc then i would stay there - as there is no risk to getting hurt, or indeed getting into a relationship for all the wrong reasons.

 

Question is....what are you ending?

[Honey Pumpkin]

If you were dating a guy who admitted that he wasn't that into you and didnt see you as a girlfriend, but liked hanging out with you, would you stay with the situation and milk it for what it's worth, until the very end (like stay for the sex, companionship, etc., for as long as possible)? Or would you just end it right then and there and walk away?

 

Why or why not? If you milk it out, you can also be looking for someone else too. Besides, it is not YOU who don't have the feelings for him, but HE who don't have the feelings for ya.

 

No, I'd have to end it right away. It would be too hard for my self-esteem, and I would know that no matter how hard I rationalised it, I would be badly hurt by feeling like I wasn't quite 'good enough' to make it as a g/f. Even if I had feelings, I would have to cut the relationship because the potential for being badly hurt would be too much for me.

 

I had a friend who would settle for these kinds of relationships - and it actually went badly wrong. Because the guy started off by telling her she wasn't g/f material, and when she hung around as his 'sex friend' (of course she loved him), his feelings got worse; he didn't have any respect for her, because he felt she had no self-respect, and so treated her quite badly. Which made her feel even more clingy and desperate, and unworthy. In my opinion it's not a healthy relationship at all. If you stay in touch with him, it should be as JUST FRIENDS.

 

Good luck.

[hennypenny3288]

You get companionship and some sex. Everything but a "relationship".

 

If you stick around, you know what the cards are so you can be looking while still enjoying the current thing.

 

Or would this be considered using the guy? although HE's the one who doesn't want a relationship with YOU.

[pretty girl digs graves]

all u want, just do that. some people do that u know. i would find it demeaning and actually harmful in my next relationship. how would u accept someone that values you when you don't value yourself? if a man ever told me i only want to string u along for the effortless sex, gawd, i would punch him in the face and boot his balls to the moon. but if he was really great doing the deed, well....tough one eh

[Batya33]

You get companionship and some sex. Everything but a "relationship".

 

If you stick around, you know what the cards are so you can be looking while still enjoying the current thing.

 

Or would this be considered using the guy? although HE's the one who doesn't want a relationship with YOU.

 

It depends what you want and how honest you are with yourself as to what you want. For me there would be zero benefit - I'd rather never date than date someone who didn't think there was potential for a relationship. I don't see any benefits to that - the s_x would feel "icky" and I'd rather have dinner, go to movies, do date stuff, alone or with friends than with someone like that. But, it's an individual decision of course.

[pretty girl digs graves]

if yes...any comments...i will share too

[RayKay]

No way.

 

Because you are both in it for different reasons, and that will lead to hurt and imbalance. You will lose your confidence, and often try and be "perfect" to fit what you think he DOES want - which will fail. You will be you - which will fail too as you are probably great the way you are, just not the right fit...that je ne sais quoi is missing.

 

Really it is disrespectful to YOURSELF, and you really have to learn to love yourself and only accept situations that show that love.