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how long before its a relationship and sex


joe45
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Previously i met a girl off the net we went out like once a week for approx 2 months.

my main question is this how long or how many dates would you as a guy or gal go on before askin or assuming that you and her are bf/gf? i was dating Jen(gal i met off the net) for 2 months , and when i asked her if we were dating or relatonship-she said dating. isn't 2 months enough to consider urself bf/gf.

if the dating thing went on for more than 2 months lets say 4-5 months and she still said it was dating -what would you think of this. was i just getting the run around or not. i'm just glad i didn;t spend a lot of money on her. if this scenario happened to you , what would u think.

 

oh ya get this --- she had a previous bf which she dated for a month and she already considered him as a bf, but with me its just dating hmmm. why?

 

 

 

also as a guy or gal who have been on dates how long , before you guys even have sex. in 2 months i only kissed her in the theatre but nothing more, we both live at home-so no place.

is 2 months -once a wk too short to ask for sex or how long is appropriate? do u just aske for it, or do you jsut go for a kiss and ....... and then sex .

 

give me feedback on what you guys think, yea total rookie as u now of it

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Well, first of all, if she considers what you and her are as "dating" and not a "relationship", then sex might not be a good idea. And having sex too soon in a relationship can hurt it. I think it's just something that you slowly work towards and it's also a good thing to talk about before doing it.

 

I don't really understand the difference between dating and being in a relationship. Maybe a relationship just means making a commitment to that one person while dating means you can see other people?

 

I think you need to ask her about this. I mean, we could give you ideas, but the only one who knows is her. She knows what she considers the difference to be. So just ask her, it's good to be honest and open about what you are feeling or questioning.

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Hi Joe,

 

How long is a piece of string? Sorry to be trite, but I don't think there are any official answers to your questions. In the UK, we don't 'date' the same way as you guys do, it's more seeing someone, going out with them, becoming bf/gf. (I read a great book recently by Marian Keyes which pointed out the difference!). Anyway, I'm rambling - erm, I think personally you're bf/gf when you can arrange to do something in the future and expect the other one to commit to that; eg go away for a weekend, go to a 'do' together, that kind of stuff. So maybe it's a calendar thing, lol. But you know what I mean, if you had something on towards the end of September, would you automatically invite this girl along, or would it be a big deal and you have to ask her?

 

As for sex - it takes me ages to go to bed with someone. I'm not a great example, but I don't think I would get there any faster if I felt the guy was mentally calculating how many times we had been out, and shouldn't we be *there* by now! I don't think there's a right or a wrong answer, other than when you both feel ready. Which is not what you want to hear, I'm sorry! But we're all different, and I know it sounds trite but I think the key to it all is communication and understanding.

 

Good luck!

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The amount of time you spend with someone makes no difference because you're not suppose to assume you're in a relationship with someone. There has to be a "talk" where it's discussed. Typically girls have asked me "so, are you seeing anybody else right now?" or something like that. You can bring it up, but for me the girl has always asked when she's ready.

 

As far as sex, it's not something that you ask for, you just progress physically. Kissing, touching, taking clothes off, foreplay, these are all precursers to sex. Just try when the time feels right to progress it and do it in the heat of the moment.

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