So, MySpace is quite possibly the worst invention ever.

[The Vitruvian Man]

It's been a year since I broke up with my (first) girlfriend. Just today a mutual friend of ours wanted to "Friend" me on MySpace. When looking at her profile, I saw a link to the ex's.

 

Of course I didn't click on it, but that all-too-familiar pain rose up in my chest and stomache and now it won't go away. And now, I feel bad for being this overwhelmed by just seeing a stupid little icon, which in turn makes the pain worse. I thought I was past the point where even seeing a stupid little icon that would lead to me reading about her life would affect me so much. After one freaking year! I thought my heart was just about healed up, but perhaps not.

 

So I guess what I am wondering is, has anybody else gone through something similar and what did you do about it? Or if anybody else has any advice for me, I would appreciate it. Thanks.

[bebecole]

i saw that my ex got myspace, and ofcourse me being a dumb@ss i clicked on it and i felt the same way. i started crying, getting really emotional cuz i started to miss him. i saw other girls leaving comments. i felt the same pain.

but then i sat there and acually thought to myself, why the hell am i crying over him!??!?! just remember theres someone out their better for you.

 

as for the myspace. advoid her page and just dont think about it!

stay away from myspace for a few days and do stuff you like to enjoy!

[theproman23]

Well the best thing to do is delete any connection to your ex. I deleted my facebook account because it would be too painful for me to see what's going on with her. Try and stay away from anything and everything that connects to your ex. It's hard not to revert back to old memories when seeing that reminds you of your ex. You'll be ok just make it a point not to check up on anything about your ex. A yr is a long time but everyone heals at a different rate, I still care for this girl I liked 6 yrs ago and would go out with her in a second, so don't worry you'll be ok.

 

BTW awesome icon for your profile.

[lady00]

Take an extended break from myspace. If anyone really needs to contact you for anything important they won't do it through myspace. And if they don't have your phone number or email address then they probably aren't people that you are really friends with or that really need to get in touch with you.

[Majoraslayer]

MySpace is one God-awful creation when it comes to breakups. My ex had left comments on mine telling me she loved me a few months before she cheated on me and we broke up. About a week after the breakup, I finally went on MySpace for the hell of it. Without even thinking, I saw her new profile pic next to the comments she had left. Its perhaps one of the most horrible pains in the universe to see old messages left by the one you love telling you she loves you, with a picture next to it of her with the new guy she cheated on you with.

 

I closed my eyes to delete her comments, but I think life would be best if I deleted my MySpace altogether. Its not really all that important to me. Does anyone know how to delete a MySpace account?

[bebecole]

myspace does suck.

[PRSOV]

I avoid myspace altogether...

[rose2summer]

Yes, I agree myspace and any online sites like it, including dating sites aren't great. I just went back on myspace after my break-up to force myself to remain socialable. I have wanted to isolate myself and stay home and just work work work, but I realize that's unhealthy that right now I just need to find who I am again, so I am making myself go out and have fun. Last night, I had coffee with a friend and tonight I am going to a wedding. As much as I want to, I can't let myself be isolated and must be a social butterfly to heal.

[Majoraslayer]

I really don't recommend going to a wedding after a huge breakup. You don't want to break down in a crying fit in the middle of the ceremony. Crying at a wedding is one thing; uncontrollable bawling is another.

[Dako]

At the risk of going OT, I've had a a hobby website for about 10 years and learned that privacy can be golden. When Myspace came along, I wondered who would expose their entire life is such a reckless way. I still don't get it, unless someone either craves attention or has yet to have a crazed cyberstalker.

 

Sure you can build a site with all your personal info with no problems when life is dandy, but breakups are just one thing that can ruin the party. For example, I'd hate to have a stalker, or get sued by a viewer, or have an employer pondering my innermost thoughts. Sure, It's anonymous, until it's not.

 

Just my 2 bits

[Majoraslayer]

I never understood MySpace either. Mine contained very little personal information, and I made it just because all of my friends were asking "can i adds u 2 my myspace0rz? lolz".

 

But, I just cancelled my account. No major loss, and no one on there can bother me.

[brando]

So you are saying because a link to your ex gf is on there it is the worst invention ever?? That is a stretch, and you have nothing to hold against link removed.

[rose2summer]

Well, I am going to the wedding. I am very happy for my friend and my own break-up should not effect my desire to celebrate her happiness in having found the man of her dreams. I will not cry. I am happy about my break-up the majority of the time because this man was a major manipulator and controlling person, so I am best without him. Why dwell in the past when the future is so bliss?

[The Vitruvian Man]

So you are saying because a link to your ex gf is on there it is the worst invention ever?? That is a stretch, and you have nothing to hold against link removed.

 

Well perhaps my wording made more sense in my head, but you are totally correct. It's not that site's fault by any stretch.

 

The way I meant it was the worst invention ever in regards to moving on from a breakup. And now that I think about it, it's not really that site's fault in that respect either. It's completely my own. I just have to take more proactive steps to move on.

 

To those who have shared their stories of similar circumstances: thanks. It made me feel better knowing that I wasn't the only one who has gone through something like this.

[brando]

i know what you meant, but i think if you are involved on Myspace and an ex is also, it will take an incredible amount of self control to not be curious.

 

No offense man.

 

be well,

brando

[The Vitruvian Man]

i know what you meant, but i think if you are involved on Myspace and an ex is also, it will take an incredible amount of self control to not be curious.

 

No offense man.

 

be well,

brando

 

None taken. I am taking a break from that site so I am not tempted and because I need to concentrate on more important matters. Thanks, man.

[frigginexes]

I dont have a myspace because I dont want my ex to know what I'm up to. You cant really disappear if you have a myspace and are updating it all the time. They will get their fix of you by looking at your page.

[Ians Mommy]

You can block people on myspace so they can't see your profile but I'm not sure if it's the other way around also.

[Beaker5]

Hi guys,

 

I think myspace is great because it actually helped me with my healing process. After my boyfriend dumped me because according to him, "Things went downhill", I told him that I would wait for him for as long as it takes because I thought he was just going through a bad phase. After three weeks of waiting for him to come back and crying everyday, I started to search on myspace. He didn't have a myspace account when he had been dating me and I actually found a new profile that he had created and it contained messages to the girl he had been cheating on me with!!!! WOW what a shocker that was to me...But because of that, I was able to move on and begin my healing process. I threw away everything that reminded me of him and I'm not waiting for him in Limbo!!! MYSPACE SAVED MY LIFE!!!

 

 

Also...Frigginexes, wow, I never thought of that...That actually makes sense:

You cant really disappear if you have a myspace and are updating it all the time. They will get their fix of you by looking at your page.

 

Thanks for the advice...I just set my profile to private.

[blindreepr]

Also...Frigginexes, wow, I never thought of that...That actually makes sense:

You cant really disappear if you have a myspace and are updating it all the time. They will get their fix of you by looking at your page.

 

Thanks for the advice...I just set my profile to private.

 

Finally taking my profile off of private and finally accepting my ex's friend request made her even more curious and wanting to know about me. The more bullitens I posted about all the fun stuff I was doing the more she thought about me and checked out my profile. She told me herself that she checks my profile multiple times a day. Things I posted in my bullitens even "made" her break NC after I told her not to talk to me again.

 

Does she want to get back together? No. Are we friends? She wants to be.

 

Her constant barage of contacting me needlessly and trying to force a friendship on me has pushed me away to the point where I dont even want to see her.

 

BTW, she is the one that broke up with me.