What do you think of this?

[melrich]

I called him again just now--and he said he couldn't answer orginally b/c he was unloading things but then he forgot to call back..he says he did call his g-ma and she said it was too late and that his brother showed up at his house--so they went to his shop to unload the garbage--b/c the regular garbage won't take this stuff.

So he says that is where he is now.

A little bit more believable?

 

That sounds just too normal

 

Are you sure there wasn't police involvement or some kind of undercover operation going down?

[MJMJ]

So in your joking way, you are saying its a believable thing?

[saltwatergirl]

ok guys--well here goes..

 

when i called him originally at 10:30--he said he was about to call his grandmother and he was busy with garbage--not regular garbage but heavy duty things--like car parts etc.

 

I called him again just now--and he said he couldn't answer orginally b/c he was unloading things but then he forgot to call back..he says he did call his g-ma and she said it was too late and that his brother showed up at his house--so they went to his shop to unload the garbage--b/c the regular garbage won't take this stuff.

So he says that is where he is now.

A little bit more believable?

 

Yes. But let's wait and see what he does tomorrow between 10 and 12 am.

 

(im kidding)

 

Seems all is well for now. Glad we could help.

 

Im kinda let down now, anybody else have a drama they could get going for us?

 

Salt

[saltwatergirl]

That sounds just too normal

 

Are you sure there wasn't police involvement or some kind of undercover operation going down?

 

Actually Melrich, in a way WE were right, because he was NOT at grandmas!!!!

 

Salt

[MJMJ]

He also says he is gonna have to cancel on me tomorrow and possibly saturday b/c his mother wants a patio built before an occasion next week..that sucks--but i guess i should be supportive right?

[saltwatergirl]

HMMMMMMMMM

 

Salt

[MJMJ]

hmmm what? lol

[melrich]

He also says he is gonna have to cancel on me tomorrow and possibly saturday b/c his mother wants a patio built before an occasion next week..that sucks--but i guess i should be supportive right?

 

OK let's pick the trail up again tomorrow. The Grandma thing fell through and the garbage things got a ring of truth about it. The whole patio thing I'm not so sure......

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

Ha! Ok all a bit off topic but also related. Funny story and TRUE:

 

I had a BF, he was a drunk. Always unreliable because of the drink. So one time he outright stood me up. Next time he came around, I kept asking him what became of him, and he wouldn't tell me. Then finally he (hesitantly) "admitted" to me that he had been somewhat 'kidnapped' by the FBI, and they had forced him to participate in some sort of undercover operation. I laughed so hard I cried. And the thing is, he was sooo adamant about it all. Like he just couldn't believe that I didn't believe him.

 

AAAHHH... Thanks for the memories, that was so damn funny....

[MJMJ]

i will be there for the occasion so obviously i would see the work done or what gets completed

[saltwatergirl]

Ha! Ok all a bit off topic but also related. Funny story and TRUE:

 

I had a BF, he was a drunk. Always unreliable because of the drink. So one time he outright stood me up. Next time he came around, I kept asking him what became of him, and he wouldn't tell me. Then finally he (hesitantly) "admitted" to me that he had been somewhat 'kidnapped' by the FBI, and they had forced him to participate in some sort of undercover operation. I laughed so hard I cried. And the thing is, he was sooo adamant about it all. Like he just couldn't believe that I didn't believe him.

 

AAAHHH... Thanks for the memories, that was so damn funny....

 

LOL WHATTTTT. That really happened? Oh my gosh, my eyes are watering over here. I can't even type LOLOL

 

Salt

[melrich]

i will be there for the occasion so obviously i would see the work done or what gets completed

 

Yeah...seriously your b/f sounds like a great guy helping his Grandma and Mom. I would really cut him a break. Accept he's a great guy and enjoy him. If he proves us wrong then so be it but not on all the evidence we have gathered here.

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

LOL WHATTTTT. That really happened? Oh my gosh, my eyes are watering over here. I can't even type LOLOL

 

Salt

 

No! I SWEAR!! I swear to god! It is absolutely TRUE!!

 

LOL.... I'm sorry but whenever I remember it I laugh to this day. When He told me that I swear I laughed so hard I was in fact crying and I almost peed. Funniest thing is he was all 'indignant' because I wasn't taking him seriously....Ahhh...the memories.....I just ran into him, too, last week....

[saltwatergirl]

i will be there for the occasion so obviously i would see the work done or what gets completed

 

He's gonna build a patio in one day?

 

Salt

[MJMJ]

him and his brother--tomorrow he said they will go for the materials and saturday they are supposed to build it--i said the same thing--and he said it doesn't look like it can be completed but we'll see.

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

Yeah...seriously your b/f sounds like a great guy helping his Grandma and Mom. I would really cut him a break. Accept he's a great guy and enjoy him. If he proves us wrong then so be it but not on all the evidence we have gathered here.

 

Yeah, but he shouldn't be wanting to spend all his weekends with his mommy and his Grammy.....Sorry...but that's not really my idea of a great catch. But for this once, OP, I think you should just let it slide, and honestly, if I were you, I think you should just go out of town with friends for the weekend, or maybe go out with friends, and just give him lots of space, see what happens then. I don't think you wanna be in a serious relationship with someone who puts others before you. Even his mom or gran.

[saltwatergirl]

No! I SWEAR!! I swear to god! It is absolutely TRUE!!

 

LOL.... I'm sorry but whenever I remember it I laugh to this day. When He told me that I swear I laughed so hard I was in fact crying and I almost peed. Funniest thing is he was all 'indignant' because I wasn't taking him seriously....Ahhh...the memories.....I just ran into him, too, last week....

 

I am telling you this is GREATNESS. LOL. I think you deserve some kind of award or something, this has to be up there with the best of them. I have known of claiming a terminal disease and the like, but kidnapped by the FBI. Ohhhhh my side hurts.

 

Salt

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

I am telling you this is GREATNESS. LOL. I think you deserve some kind of award or something, this has to be up there with the best of them. I have known of claiming a terminal disease and the like, but kidnapped by the FBI. Ohhhhh my side hurts.

 

Salt

 

OH, thank you for that! Up till now, I've kind of kept that little jewel to myself. But I'm glad I'm not alone in my feeling of incredulity. I really think that one deserves an award too! Sure wish I had it on video or something.

[MJMJ]

You don't think its right for him to put his mom or his old grandmother before me?

 

 

With all honesty--i have actually had trouble with this as well..like as soon as his mother wants something done--he will do it..even it meant cancelling on me unless we had some reservations somewhere...it does bother me..but i am just thinking some people are like that--family comes first...it actually bothers me but making an argument out of it--he will say ok--so i am just supposed to tell my mother no when she has been wanting this done for years?

 

i actually don't think this is anything that will change..either i accept the fact this his family will come first or just leave him..he doesnt do this every weekend--BUT if something comes up where he is needed (like his brother was working on a project for his company--so every weekend for a few weeks he would be busy--we got into an argument--and he said if i am able to help my brother keep his business going, i am going to and that he can't do anything about it, other things sometimes need to take precedence he said. So yes--this has actually been a problem with me b/c i don't feel first a lot of the times and that feeling does suck and maybe that is why i feel insecure too as well. Of course he knows this, and he says he doesnt place me second and spends the majority of his free time with me--which is about 3 nights a week..not that much...i'm trying to let go of that resentment and maybe see it as a good quality that he is "family man" type of guy..what do you think?

[saltwatergirl]

It's good to be able to look back and laugh at things like this. I think it helps keep us from going insane. Or, committing a felony.

 

Salt

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

MJMJ, Actually, no I think it could be a bad sign. I realise this is contrary to the pat advice that you hear often, touting that "family bonds" are a virtue(yawn...). Obviously some people have never had the joy of dating a man with a disfunctional, clingy, meddling family, and thereforeeee are unable to realise that anyone in that situation would show much more emotional stability by breaking free of them.

 

Now, let it go this once, and give him plenty of space, but if he keeps putting others before you, week after week, then yes, he's not a keeper.

[saltwatergirl]

This is hard because on the one hand, yes it is a noble quality that he cares for his family and takes personal responsibility to be there for them. On the other hand, he's with you, and that relationship should be of equal or better priority. I mean, he has left the nest he isnt a child anymore, at some point you have to shift your priority from parents to sig. other. That's just a fact of life. hard for many to accept and he may not be ready to do so. How old is he?

 

Does he drop things and run to you when you have something come up suddenly and need him? If not, yes, I'd say you have every right to feel like second fiddle and it is a very insecure feeling....does in fact also lead to trust issues. He does seem to be tied up with them ALOT.

 

Ive experienced this before, seeing someone only on Friday night and Saturday, with Sunday being reserved for family and M-F being work/school. I resented it. Much more than I ever realized until recently.

You really start to feel like a side note.

 

Are you an only child?

 

Salt

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

MJMJ, I agree with Salty, whether you're religious or not, it even says in the bible when a man is grown he leaves his mother and cleaves to his wife. Well sure, you're not his wife, but then he doesn't seem to be grown. As an SO, I believe he should be working hard to let you know you're his first priority, not 2nd, 3rd, or 35th.

[melrich]

Yeah, but he shouldn't be wanting to spend all his weekends with his mommy and his Grammy

 

Well I guess I was assuming that he was not building and estate of patios, just the one.

 

MJMJ...is he building more than one?

 

BTW, how long you guys been together?

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

Well I guess I was assuming that he was not building and estate of patios, just the one.

 

MJMJ...is he building more than one?

 

BTW, how long you guys been together?

 

Well he's already chosen to spend tonight helping gran rather than spend with her, then he's now chosen to spend this coming weekend with his mommy. I can see a pattern, can you?