HELP! Ex wants to take me out for my birthday?

[lioness726]

So, for those of you that don't know my story: We were together for three years. This is our THIRD break up. He emotionally cheated on me but never had sex with another girl. Although he did make out with a girl friend of mine, a girl in which he didn't even find attractive.

 

He took me for granted, disrespected me, and didn't give as much as I gave him.

 

Anyway, after numerous fights within our last months, I told him that I had it. I was unhappy, hurt, and I couldn't take it anymore.

 

Now, I'm sitting here at work and I get a text from him that says, "If you're available Saturday night, I'd like to take you out for your birthday. No funny business, I swear."

 

What do I say? How do I respond? I've been doing complete NC and my damn birthday isn't for another week and a half.

I really SHOULD NOT be with him. I DON'T want to be with him... But why is he doing this?

 

And here's the other thing- he posted a blog about a party he's throwing at his house on Saturday. Why is he offering to take me out?

[kellbell]

Hey there,

 

Do not fall for it. Man, he has a huge ego. If I were you, I would be PO'ed!!! What a JERK!!! Can't he be a MAN and respect your wishes??? The nerve.

 

Go out with people whom CARE about you. Enjoy your special day with friends and family whom stick by you no matter what, not some loser like him. Stay strong and perhaps refrain from looking at his blogs. He is probably counting you looking at it. Take care and Happy Birthday!

[JohnnyTable]

Whatever you do, don't go with him.

[happyninja75]

if you just sit back and read what you just posted, you should find the answer you are looking for.

[Roxari]

I know that every fiber of your being is saying "I just want to be with him". You want to see him and be with him. PLEASE DON'T. You will only find yourself hating yourself afterwards no matter how much "fun" you think you will have. GO BACK and read your posts on here. Read your letters to yourself and to him.

 

You have broken up 3 times. 3 times. Real love does NOT take a break. That is my opinion and others may have another but that is just how I feel about it. That you know of, he never physically cheated on you. You know that because WHY?? He told you so? PLEASE.....

[permasmile]

definitely not. A part of you wants to I'm sure. But it is far too soon. I urge you to avoid this outing.

 

BOL

[Belle]

Hi Lioness,

 

I remember you. I hope you don't fall for it. He's baiting you. His ego can't take that you can live without him. I really hope you stay nc with him. You need to get completely over him before you can even consider talking to him again.

 

My ex gave me a birthday present and he was the same person. He was a little sweeter, but he was just that I would forget him and tried to string me along. Don't be fooled. Your ex is still the same jack... he was when you guys broke up.

[Silentlyfor]

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!!

 

Let him go!!

[lioness726]

Thanks guys. I know it's SOO not a good idea. I just can't understand why he would think it would be.

 

I told him I was busy this Saturday and then he suggested Sunday. That's when he corrected himself and said not this Saturday (tomorrow), but next Saturday. I told him I would call him when I got off work.

 

I think I'm just going to tell him that it's really not a good idea and it's too soon.

I just don't understand what he's playing at. I saw his truck parked in the parking lot of this bar I go to on Thursday nights. He went to the bar next door to the bar I always go to. It's like he's really trying to keep me within proximity... I know he saw my car last night- and his friends probably told him I was there. I'm sure he already knew I would be there because that's where I've been going on Thursdays.

 

My friends think it's another one of his ploys to get me back. I don't know. It's nice to see that he's having such a hard time getting over me but, really. This is just getting in the way of me getting used to a life without him. I want things to just be NORMAL again! And that won't happen with him around...

 

*sigh

[kellbell]

Lioness,

 

Don't tell him anything. No answer should be his answer. If you contact him, it will give him an excuse to contact you back, giving him the chance to tell you what you want to hear. That can get very hard and set you up for a trap. You are still hurting, vulnerable, and angry. All of which can jade you from the big picture. Your best defense is NC. You can't go wrong that way.

 

He can check up on you all he wants, he is still testing you and victimizing you by doing this. Just ignore him. Stay strong chica!

 

(((hugs)))

[JohnnyTable]

Don't worry about that it is "too soon" or that you are "busy". The bottom line is that you simply aren't interested. This is all that you owe him. Time is passing by and you are playing games with yourself. You are allowing yourself to be played.

 

What he thinks and what he does is irrelevant. What matters is what you do, and what you should be doing is moving on!

[darkblue]

Two words: No Way.

[BetterKarma]

Don't fall for it. It's his ploy to worm his way back into his life. He'll be sweet in the beginning and then things will go right back to the way it was before. Do you really want to be hurt a fourth time?

 

Be strong. Let him go.

[gaiden]

Tell you what, I fly over there and take you out myself. Tell him NO WAY. That is such a bad idea lion lady person. Please don't fall for it.