Moon Goddess Posted June 5, 2006 Share Posted June 5, 2006 The soft breeze that caresses my face The warm sun that embraces me softly Reminders of what I had to accept...our cruel fate Not having you here, loiving you still, kills me gently The cotton like clouds I lived upon Have now faded into the distance I know confess I have loved you all along With you my life changed in an instant Although it kills me inside to know we can't be It's a sweet pain I enjoy It can't be you, the problem lies within me After all I'm just a girl, you are but a boy Your love was but a rose So beautiful ad enchanting But as always there was a thorn to impose That thorn was distance, always so commanding We never got to make this right Maybe it was me, I was weak and lost But in all of that you were my light Even if you love me, I have to pay the cost So our love remains unfulfilled The story never had an ending We left each other against our will Now these broken hearts need mending Link to comment
arwen Posted June 5, 2006 Share Posted June 5, 2006 Your poem shows wisdom for your young age Ilse Link to comment
bebecole Posted June 5, 2006 Share Posted June 5, 2006 i love that poem.. very good.. Link to comment
Moon Goddess Posted June 5, 2006 Author Share Posted June 5, 2006 Thank you, I'm glad you liked it, it means alot to me. Thanks I write from my heart and sometimes I think my heart has more age than I do. Thank you for your compliments I should be posting more poems soon. Link to comment
TheFallenShadow Posted June 9, 2006 Share Posted June 9, 2006 There is much truth in your words, more then you know, and this writing is very good, keep writing, it will get better. nicely written. there is much depth here in your poem. fallen Link to comment
Moon Goddess Posted June 13, 2006 Author Share Posted June 13, 2006 Thank you for you kind words they mean alot. I should be posting more soon. I'm glad you liked it. Hopefully I can talk and post more soon. Link to comment
neva_black_n_white Posted June 13, 2006 Share Posted June 13, 2006 that was amazing. gripping and encapturing. i really liked it. i have nothing against age and dont tend to make judgements, but i was just amazed by everything that youve captured in your poem (gainst the typical 13 year old - harsh comment i know but in a weird way a compliment) its amazing, beautiful. the harsh truth. i like it neva x Link to comment
Moon Goddess Posted June 13, 2006 Author Share Posted June 13, 2006 I'm glad you liked it I have seen some of your poetry and coming from you it is an accomplishment that you think it's good. Thanks for the kind words everyone. Link to comment
Daddy Bear Posted June 13, 2006 Share Posted June 13, 2006 wow! what depth... beyond the capabilities of the average adult, i dare say. i can't imagine what your poetry will sound like when you have lived a few more years. Link to comment
AnotherBrokenDoll Posted June 14, 2006 Share Posted June 14, 2006 Oh MG i loved that! That was such a gorgeous poem and your emotions were really felt... I kinda felt that way once but my poem was alot different to the one i wrote... It was great to see those emotions put in a different sense! Keep writing darlin all your work is so amazing and you can really feel every word you put into it! Love always and forever bubz Rozi! Link to comment
Moon Goddess Posted June 14, 2006 Author Share Posted June 14, 2006 I can't imagine it either and rereading it, it sounds like I'm older I used depth in my poem more than ever before. I'm sorry you passed through this it's not a good feeling. I'm amazed by all the compliments I never think by poetry is that good but I love hearing your opinions on it good or bad. Link to comment
Recommended Posts