Insecure about my size

[unsuregem]

I am a 20 year old female who is petite for my age, so people normally assume I'm alot younger than I really am. It normally gets to me because I'm often reminded by comments and remarks from persons surrounding me. I probably think that is one of the reasons I tend to be insecure about what I wear and such. Sometimes it gets to the point I cry and wish I would just gain a few extra pounds. I dont ever wear short skirts because my legs are quite skinny and I know that would attract more remarks and comments. Honestly I try to accept myself how I am but its the constant attention to my petiteness that makes me feel bad. Do you know of anything that could help me gain weight? Furthermore I live in the Caribbean and I find the majority of people that were petite like me when they go overseas to study for example, in the United States or England, they tend to gain weight. However I think it is highly impossible for me to gain weight since I have not gained not even 2 pounds over the pass few years. Thanks in advance for taking the time out to read this problem that has been apart of my life for sometime.

[Süsser Tod]

You believe too much in stereotypes or whatever they sell on the TV.

 

I can tell you, I don't like tall women, I love petite girls.

 

My current GF is 5'1 (157cms), and weights 50kg (110lbs) previous one was 5'3 and a tad heavier, but she has been the tallest girl I've dated.

 

I'm 6'1, so we have to look for something for her to stand if we are going to kiss for a while

[RayKay]

Hey unsure,

 

For years people always thought I was younger then I was! I remember one time when I was waitressing someone was worried I was working illegally as they thought I was so much younger! I am petite, but for me I think it was also more just my facial structure that did it too.

 

My sister is 7 years younger then me, and people always thought SHE was the older one and I the younger...for example when she was 15, people thought she was 20, and I was 15!

 

I know it's going to sound odd....and contrary to what you would "think" you should do, but start going to the gym and working out. I used to have really thin legs too, but once I got into cycling and running they got stronger and more shapely - I have great calves and hips now (and my butt got way cuter!). Same for the rest of my body with yoga and weights. You will NOT get bulky or look butch, but you will get tone that can give you curves. A personal trainer once told me that he has seen some very thin clients get amazing curves and booty from working out the right way! It can also give you great confidence and pride in the strength you have.

 

Going out and trying to gain just weight of any sort (like fat though) won't really alter your appearance the same way that developing curves with muscle can. You are lucky too, as because you are petite/thin, those curves will show much easier and sooner!

 

And hey, love your petiteness. Nothing wrong with being petite! We come in all shapes and sizes, and are all beautiful in our own right.

[kellbell]

Hey there,

 

I would not feel so bad about your size. As RayKay pointed out, women come in different shapes and sizes. I am almost 30, and I still get carded for booze. Once, when I was 25, I was carded to see an R-rated movie! And when I was a bartender, I was constantly asked if I was old enough to serve alcohol (have to be 18 do that in the USA) and I was like 25-27. So I reckon I look very young for my age and I am proud of it. Looking young is all the rage these days. I try to enjoy while I can.

 

Be proud girl...chin up.

 

(((hugs)))

[BellaDonna]

I agree with RayKay. If you want to change, then do so with gaining some lean muscle. It's also a better approach for your overall health than trying to eat a lot of fat/calories to "gain weight".

 

I bet that some day, the fact that you appear younger will be something you will be happy about- probably when you reach middle age. My mom is like you- petite, never over 120 pounds, and you'd never believe she had 3 children. When I was a teenager, people used to think she was my sister. She is in her late 40's now and still looking much younger than her age, and she's quite happy about that now.

 

 

BellaDonna

[RayKay]

I agree with RayKay. If you want to change, then do so with gaining some lean muscle. It's also a better approach for your overall health than trying to eat a lot of fat/calories to "gain weight".

 

I bet that some day, the fact that you appear younger will be something you will be happy about- probably when you reach middle age. My mom is like you- petite, never over 120 pounds, and you'd never believe she had 3 children. When I was a teenager, people used to think she was my sister. She is in her late 40's now and still looking much younger than her age, and she's quite happy about that now.

 

 

BellaDonna

 

Ha, that's what I always tell my sister....wait until we are in our 50's and I still look younger!

[unsuregem]

Thanks...didnt think i would have received responses so quickly...yes and i do have a younger sister and people tend to think she is older than me....but RayKay what exercises do u recommend if i do go 2 the gym? thanks again everyone

[RayKay]

Thanks...didnt think i would have received responses so quickly...yes and i do have a younger sister and people tend to think she is older than me....but RayKay what exercises do u recommend if i do go 2 the gym? thanks again everyone

 

If you can, get a personal trainer for at least 1-2 sessions, they can really help develop a workout plan that is right for your goals and make sure you have the correct form and technique which is really a huge component of it.

 

I would be doing squats, lunges, calf raises, bench presses and rows, curls, tricep extensions, military press, etc - work the whole body.

[skyblue1]

I'm tiny too! i'm 5.2 and 6 stones and 8 pounds but think i look fine. I would love to gain a little weight too so i've been drinking protain drinks and lifting heavy weights my body fat is 23% and if you get below 17% thats very bad. Maybe go the gym and eat loads of protain! good luck

[Lady Luck]

Don't worry about being skinny. Everyone's different. I'm 5'4 and 90lbs. And it's all natural, too. My mom was tiny, so I guess it's generic. If you honestly can't get over it, steer away from eating junk foods, those will either do nothing or make you gain fat in places you don't want it. Eat healthy food, chicken and vegetables, whatever. Work out. Instead of trying to gain fat pounds, gain muscle. You'll feel better both mentally and physically.

[Diggitydave]

just off topic but i noticed everyones avatar including my own is of them holding the camera lol

[Lady Luck]

It's because MySpace has seeped into this site.. we all became camera * * * * * *, lol.

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

i have the exact same problem as you. i have been small all of my life, and have a youthful appearance. i am 34, and to this day, i not only get carded, but even if i walk into a 21 and over establishment with a group of friends, half of whom are between 21 and 26, the bouncer will look directly at me, single me out, and make a b-line to rush right over, and demand my id. to make matters worse, since my id says i'm 34, he or she simply can't accept that, and takes it over to their special little scanner-machine and makes a big scene, etc,etc...it's really annoying and embarrassing.

 

and yes, people seem to feel the need to point out to you everywhere you go how petite you are, etc etc, and it gets more than a little old after the 3 thousandth time. oh, yes and then there's the snide comments about suspected eating disorders, if i had a nickel for everytime i've heard that i would be a wealthy woman indeed. i was at a store trying on clothes the other day, and when i came back to the fitting room to give the lady a different article, the ladies and another customer were gossiping about how small i am. I said, "oh, are you talking about me?" and they looked up and said, "oh, i'm sorry, i was just telling her i thought you were an asian woman, because you're so tiny, until i saw your face" (?)...." whatever?... i don't really appreciate it, and it does get old....

 

and last but certainly not least being outright called a liar when you state either your age, or your length of experience in your career, or in life in general, always adorable when someone calls you a liar or if nothing else belittles discredits you. There is one woman in particular in the office that i manage, who almost compulsively comments on my figure, my clothing, what i am eating, my eating/ excercising habits, and how nice it must be to be small, etc, as if to imply there is nothing else about me, my life, or my experience that is of interest (jealousy, maybe?). one day, i might just say to her, "oh, yes, and you're rather large, too, interesting, isn't it?" actually no i won't because i try to treat people with respect. Do people really think that the novelty of being small hasn't worn off for those of us who are?

 

yes i lift weights like one of the other posters suggested, and get a lot of excercise, and she is right it does help, i am pretty happy with my shape and size, just the way it is, now if other people could just learn to live with it.

 

so yes there are others out there who can completely relate to your problem. when i was your age, i'm not joking, i could easily pass for about 13.

[lonestar_80]

You can gain weight if you just eat more. I had a friends from the islands and she gained a lot of wieght when she went to the US. Don't feel bad I am small too.