SilverCloud Posted March 19, 2006 Share Posted March 19, 2006 you are doing great, and thoughts of him will take some time to go away... try something like what i did today. I have made a new friend at work, today she and i went to mambo gym today, and then shopping.. It was a lot of fun just us girls. I did think of my ex but today i felt i have a new life and it was easier today.. we are going out tomorrow again. I think its good to make more friends that would have same interest to spend time with. I am also glad i have put off my plans of finding a replacement for the ex that way I can find myself again. Also i am planning on going for sky diving next weekend or the first weekend of april, i have saved money for sometime now to be able to do that it will be a awesome change.... oh wow i feel great today i want this feeling to stay for ever...i wish the same for all of you too. Link to comment
didyoumissme Posted March 20, 2006 Author Share Posted March 20, 2006 SliverCloud, I feel the same way.. I wish the heart healed as fast as the time does too!20 days of NC today, Happy Spring! Link to comment
SilverCloud Posted March 20, 2006 Share Posted March 20, 2006 SliverCloud, I feel the same way.. I wish the heart healed as fast as the time does too!20 days of NC today, Happy Spring! Oh my God , you reached day 20 i am soooooooooooooooooooooooo happy for you... I feel good today i have made plans with some new friends to go indoor rock climbing(Florida has no hills ). I would have never been able to do that with my ex, he always had a bad back, also cause of many other reasons(partially my faults too). I think i will do something new every weekend, cause then i spend the weekdays thinking about all the great things i will be doing, instead of what ex is doing with new girlfriend(ugh sleeping with her and many other things that would hurt me even if he is not). I am actually more happy... i ask people who i would not ask before if they wana come and we actually end up having fun. I wish we all could have a enotalone adventures hahaahaha would give us all to do something fun and company when we need it the most, the weekends... Link to comment
photomo Posted March 20, 2006 Share Posted March 20, 2006 It's 10 weeks to the day that I initiated NC....that's 70 days!!...the longest time apart in 6 years. NC gets easier, but I believe you have to hit such a low point where you possibly cannot get anymore hurt to realise that NC is the best/only option to maintain your sanity. NC gets easier, believe me. I've rediscovered myself, feel like a better person, got new hobbies...and feel pity for my ex who doesn't know what she is missing out on. It's entirely her loss; I deserve better. *** The person worth being upset about is the person who will never make you upset. *** Link to comment
didyoumissme Posted March 21, 2006 Author Share Posted March 21, 2006 Ah, this is so hard. especially because he was the last to contact me thro phone... But, he hasn't called ( to my knowledge) since he lefted me that short voice mail almost 3 weeks ago. Link to comment
didyoumissme Posted March 21, 2006 Author Share Posted March 21, 2006 I'm starting to feel really sad,again.... Link to comment
SilverCloud Posted March 21, 2006 Share Posted March 21, 2006 I'm starting to feel really sad,again.... Yep you will get these feelings but you have to realise how much effort do you think he is making to contact you. That call that was three weeks ago was like a piece of bread thrown towards you to lure you back. You are worth a whole lot more effort. Dont ever forget that... Link to comment
jl301 Posted March 22, 2006 Share Posted March 22, 2006 Hey Slivercloud, You should be proud of yourself. Wow, 3 months of NC. I'm on day 15 of NC and is been struggle. I miss her and her daughter dearly. I wonder, if she ever going to call me or did she forget me already? Just so much thoughts run through our heads. Link to comment
SilverCloud Posted March 22, 2006 Share Posted March 22, 2006 Hey Slivercloud, You should be proud of yourself. Wow, 3 months of NC. I'm on day 15 of NC and is been struggle. I miss her and her daughter dearly. I wonder, if she ever going to call me or did she forget me already? Just so much thoughts run through our heads. Thank you jl301. I guess my strenght for being able to make it to 3 months is based on the fact that i had tried very hard to make the relationship work, three times before. The forth time i got dumped by my ex i realised that i need to get a grip of myself. I also got through by seeing that in all this time not once was my ex even trying to contact me. You should realize this that it does not matter if she forgot you or not, what matters is that what is she doing to make the relationship work. Please do what ever you can to see that you stop hoping for her to call. Link to comment
deejay74 Posted March 22, 2006 Share Posted March 22, 2006 so i have been on NC for about a week and some change. yeah, it sucks, yeah i still miss her (people think i am crazy for missing her since she's been sooo cold and mean to me). even though i deleted her off my friendster and myspace lists, i keep checking her profile which i can't seem to help for some reason. she's not seeing anyone as far as i know, her status is still set to "single" but there are new pics on her profiles taken after we were broken up. she looks good i must say and it makes me sad that i can't see her in real life. i don't even know if she noticed i deleted her off her lists, she probably doesn't care anyway. *sigh* - i really, really can't wait til i don't even care about her profiles and whether or not she's got new pics up there. it will be 3 months at the end of this month since the break up. i pray to god that by summer i'll be over this completely. the missing is the most agonizing part of the whole thing. Link to comment
didyoumissme Posted March 22, 2006 Author Share Posted March 22, 2006 Yep you will get these feelings but you have to realise how much effort do you think he is making to contact you. That call that was three weeks ago was like a piece of bread thrown towards you to lure you back. You are worth a whole lot more effort. Dont ever forget that... I'm so tired right now as I hardly got many winks of sleep last night kinda watching my phone in hopeing he would call or something.. Now, I'm stuck going to work feeling really sleepy. Have a good day, Hang in there! Link to comment
tiffatkins Posted March 22, 2006 Share Posted March 22, 2006 The thing that I found helpful was to keep busy. Hang out with friends and even date around. As soon as you are actually having fun you will slowly start to forget the urge to contact him. Link to comment
Pikey1972 Posted March 22, 2006 Share Posted March 22, 2006 Yes, I definitely agree with tiffatkins: try to keep as busy as possible - immediately after my break-up, I tried to keep myself occupied almost every night, until I felt OK to spend time by myself (this took approx. 2 months). Although I still miss my ex, I now feel ready to date again (it's been 5 months since the split) - so once you feel comfortable / confident to date again, I'd go for it! After all, you have noting to lose, and there's no need to feel obligated to go out with anyone until you feel absolutely ready. Link to comment
SilverCloud Posted March 22, 2006 Share Posted March 22, 2006 How is everyone doing today? I am a bit down today but should be fine soon Link to comment
didyoumissme Posted March 23, 2006 Author Share Posted March 23, 2006 I wish the urge would go away, it's killing me! I'm sad, & sleepy today. But, I'm okay. Link to comment
SilverCloud Posted March 23, 2006 Share Posted March 23, 2006 lack of sleep... you will get through that dont worry, your body will force you to go to sleep on of these days. but you are doing good soo dont give up.. Link to comment
designer71 Posted March 23, 2006 Share Posted March 23, 2006 I have been doing NC for a few weeks now, and I find that every day I get under my belt makes it that much easier to do it again the next day. When i successfully make it through a day without calling or e-mailing him, I am so proud of my accomplishment that i don't want to "spoil" it the next day by making myself start at zero days of NC. Hope that helps! Link to comment
didyoumissme Posted March 23, 2006 Author Share Posted March 23, 2006 lack of sleep... you will get through that dont worry, your body will force you to go to sleep on of these days. but you are doing good soo dont give up..Yeah, I slept like a baby last night... I was so tired , I'd passed right out! Thankyou & your doing great too! We can never give up! Link to comment
SilverCloud Posted March 23, 2006 Share Posted March 23, 2006 I have been doing NC for a few weeks now, and I find that every day I get under my belt makes it that much easier to do it again the next day. When i successfully make it through a day without calling or e-mailing him, I am so proud of my accomplishment that i don't want to "spoil" it the next day by making myself start at zero days of NC. Hope that helps! That is such a good thought i will make sure i think of it the next time i miss my ex.... didyoumissme glad to hear that you slept well... and yes we can give up we are much stronger then that... Link to comment
SilverCloud Posted March 27, 2006 Share Posted March 27, 2006 How is everyone holding up? I had a great weekend didnt think about ex at all through it ... and then this morning i walk into work and a coworker who is also a mutual friend of mine and the ex, says that she got pictures from the ex today....ugggghhhh My heart sunk to the bottom again... she is aware of all my struggles that i had with my ex and the pain i went through afterwards. She keeps saying how wrong my ex was and has been a piller of support when i feel weak. I know she didnt do this intentionally but oh God why would she tell me... she knows that last weekend was the first weekend with no pain. Uggghh probably sent her pictures of new girlfriend... S*** i should tell her not to mention him, but there are sooo many times when i mention him to her and seek comfort... Link to comment
jl301 Posted March 27, 2006 Share Posted March 27, 2006 Just in hang in there alright, Slivercloud. I know that you will be thinking about him alot today and probably a billions scenarios will be played out through out your mind about the ex. Be strong and know that people here on this forum are always here for you. Don't let one little bump on the road stop you from healing from this. I had my ex broke the NC and I was on day 19 of NC. I pick up the number that I didn't recognize and guess what it was her. We end up talking for about thirty minutes. Nothing has changed and that she still needs to figure things out. I felt bad for the rest of the night, however when I woke up the next morning. I told myself that I wasn't going to let her get to me. Easier said than done, but I will be strong and restart my NC. Day 2 of NC!!!! Just hang in there everyone, things will look up for all of us soon or later!!! Link to comment
deejay74 Posted March 27, 2006 Share Posted March 27, 2006 today i've been alright, not so bad. thinking about my ex still, that hasn't changed since the day she broke up with me. i think it's been about 2, or 2.5 weeks since NC. just can't wait until i can go an entire day without thinking of her. Link to comment
SilverCloud Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 I would love to be the one to say that i have completed 3 months of NC and doing wonderful but i am not. Yes it is less painful as before but i still find myself thinking of him. As you can see from the post i made here earlier today, i had a great weekend, didnt think about ex as much as i do everyday and then boom, ex sends pictures to a mutual friend who tells me about the fact that he sent her email. This friend has always been the supporter for me day or night and i didnt think i should hurt her by saying she has set me back on my progress. Part of me feels that maybe i didnt say anything cause i want to know what pictures he sent. Why am i still looking for crumbs of his life? I want to move on and thus doing activities that i wouldnt have done before to show myself that i am a new person but i still find myself missing him dearly and wish things hadnt been tarnished between us as they did cause they have left nothing to go back too. I feel i am too sensitive for relationships... I have only seen heartbreak in it, and quite honestly only find myself suffering from them, rather then learning from them. Link to comment
SilverCloud Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 no i dont mind you saying what you did. It was not butting in. You are right about having to hear about him from friends. I dont know if there is a proper way or not.. I think i have reached a stage where my only solution is to go to a phycologist. my mind has too many questions that refuse to silence and it seems like my life revolves around him more now then it did when i was with him. Thank you for your advice i think i will let the mutual friends know that i am not interested in the information. Link to comment
jman311 Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 Been reading this thread a while, wanted to say first off you guys rock! Didyoumissme and Silvercloud I am very proud of you both, you have a lot of strength and courage. I can go on here and read your thoughts, feelings, and advice to each other, I don't even know you but I can still totally relate to so much of what you say ... sort of amazing I think. I am only on day 4 of NC having failed many times so far. I had made it a week before, was doing well, but then allowed her to fill my head with false hopes which threw me into almost a month of torturing myself and trying to get her attention again. I am finally really realizing it simply wasn't working, and as much as it kills me I need to cease & desist, again. Yesterday was rough, all day I wished I could just flip a switch and stop thinking about her, if only for a while. Anyhow I got on here and read through this thread again, and I'm feeling so much better today. So, I wanted to say thank you!!! Silvercloud, if you think seeing a psychologist will help, do it! It certainly can't hurt you (IMHO). Keep on keepin' on. Link to comment
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