Ex sends email, signed LOVE

[dishrag]

OK, this is strange. Quick recap: 2 weeks ago she moves out, is happier alone. Last week she emailed me and I replied that if she wanted to communicate we had to do it with a 3rd party (therapist) and she told me communication was over when she left. We did talk this weekend when she came to get some things. I told her I forgave her and gave her a goodbye letter that detailed the happier times in our relationship. Besides that I had been NC with her initiating communication the whole time. We have to talk, we're married and there are logistics.

 

Today, she emails me me her new number, tells me I can call her at any time, asks how I'm doing and signs it Love, .

 

She didn't say she loved me for 2 weeks, now I get this. Maybe she thinks she can keep a friendship with me because I forgave her? I don't know what she's thinking but if I ask, I'm sure to be hurt again. Maybe I should ignore this and assume NC is still the way to go? Please, help me out with some advice...

[chai714]

Dish,

 

Don't overanalyze this one. She didn't come over and declare her love for you so try to brush this one under the rug. As far as NC - keep in mind that the goal and purpose of NC is to heal up. Much like an athlete must heal from an injury, emotional trauma is not much different. The process of healing requires taking time away from the source of pain (in the case of an athlete, it would be their respective sport. In your case, it's your ex). So, decide whether or not you're healed enough to bring your "A" game. If not, take as much time as needed. You owe nobody, nothing.

[brando]

Dish,

 

Who knows but her why she signed the word love. I agree with Chai, take some time ot heal yourself, stay away from her, her emails, letters, phone calls until you feel you can talk to her with litle emotional discomfort.

[askNsee]

I dont't have a lot of post, but I been reading these forums since last year and I never learned what is the meaning of NC, can someone tell me ?

[keenan]

NC is no contact, askNsee.

 

Dish, Unfortunately I agree with everybody here. She's likely expressing friendly affection for you because of your past, and trying to hold onto something familiar as she moves into a new phase of her life. I really doubt that her note means that she is having second thoughts. If she decides she wants to reconcile, she won't be ambiguous. Try to stay strong. I'm in a similar boat.

[dishrag]

Thanks everyone. Staying as strong as possible here despite her attempts to contact. Got a phone call this morning with the number and a message to call if I need to.

 

At this point, I'm waiting on a separation agreement or some other business-like contact, but have not heard any of it. Her giving me her number is kind of like throwing a tiny piece of data my way. I still have no idea where she's living, I just know it's an apartment. She's keeping all her income in a separate account, using a separate credit card, not disclosing anything at all. I'm living just like I did before she left. I'm open an honest, she's hiding things and throwing me scraps.

[designer71]

You are being so smart to not grab at those "scraps". Maybe she is just feeling a little guilty. I had a break-up a while back where I was the one who initiated the end, and when I did e-mail him for the first time after it happened, I felt bad not signing it love. It felt cruel and final to me. I was being selfish though, because it was over. Maybe she is struggling with it a little bit too - but even if she is - until she somes to you directly and says she wants to reconcile, I would just continue to do what you are doing!

Good Luck! It will get better!!!

[dishrag]

Thanks for the kind words, d!

[Hunny1607307342]

I know what you mean - my ex told me to have a good holiday after we were breaking up for half term, and then after he went, he was like "I love you loads okay...", maybe expecting me to say something back, but I didn't, because I knew he didn't mean it. He broke US, so why would he try and fix it... sad but true.

[dishrag]

True true...

 

Just to add - I got another email today signed Love. She and I have to meet to start to iron out who gets what. I decided to request that we do this in a restaurant to avoid emotions.