Relationship so complicated

[kcopeland8515]

This relationship is so complicated. I am 21 year old male. I met this girl about a year and a half ago in May through a mutual friend. A week after that we started going out. Everything went good till about December when she told me she had cheated on me in June. I was going to leave but I just thought I would forgive her. She has never given me anything. At her birthday party we had it in a hotel. She came in with her exboyfriend and both of them were drunk and she acted like I wasnt even in the room. On my 21st birthday we were going to spend the day together but she stood me up. She constantly lies. When I ask her questions concerning what shes been doing even if I ask her wat she did during the day she says im in her business. Before when I used to call her she would never pick up the phone. Then I would call from a private number and she would pick up. So I stopped calling her. She calls me everyday though without fail and tells me she loves me and what not. She is very secretive. She only has guy friends and she'll spend more time with them then me. even if they just smoking or getting drunk. I dont do that. Her phone rings off the hook with guys calling her. She has even stood me up to do things with them. SHe says shes not cheating on me. I have tried to break up with her 2 times. About 3 months ago I slipped up and now she is pregnant. Now I really dont know what to do. I know its not working out anymore. SHe ask me why dont I trust her and she tells me to trust her but with all the stuff she does would you? anyway I just need advice on what to do

[DN]

Short answer: dump her. She is using you. Big time. She stood you up on your 21st? The USSR never had a red flag bigger than that one.

[Smarie]

It seems like she has something going on behind your back. Although, it seems you have been honest with her, I dont think she is playing the same game. She has something to hide there......

[kellbell]

Hi there,

 

It's not complicated at all...it's only complicated because you are putting up with this poor behavior. Dump her!!! Don't waste another milestone birthday or any other time with her for that matter. That's horrible! So sorry about your b-day. (((hugs)))

[OceanEyes]

About 3 months ago I slipped up and now she is pregnant.

 

This is a strange thing to slip in at the end of your post. This is bad. Very bad. I would ask for a paternity test, then high-tail it out of this destructive relationship on the first thing smokin'.

 

Good luck.

[kellbell]

I'm with OceanEyes, if you think she is cheating, there is a good chance the baby is not yours. Get a paternity test. Why are you taking full responsilbility for this "slip up?" It was both of you who slipped up. This girl is bad news. I hope everything works out for you.

[DN]

I missed the pregnant part. I agree with OceanEyes. Paternity test for sure. If the baby is yours then you have to step up to the plate as a Dad - but she should forget being anything in your life other than the mother of your child.

[PocoDiablo]

Okay, first, it's highly unlikely you got her pregnant. She's a *CENSORED**CENSORED**CENSORED**CENSORED*, in case you hadn't noticed. I would (1) tell her to call you when she has a paternity test so you can get a blood test and verify you're not the father and (2) tell her not to call you otherwise.

 

She WILL use you because you are being TOO nice. She is walking all over you. She knows you are too meek to stand up for yourself and dump her, which by the way you needed to do the INSTANT she said she cheated on you.

 

When the blood test comes back, I doubt it's yours. I've seen this many times.

 

Next time you need to be a man. No woman should ever be able to dis-respect you by spending time with other men like she has. Quite frankly, if she really loved you, she'd be with you right now. She is a liar, and you are being a fool. She's out with other guys and using you for emotional and probably financial support. Do not give her a dime at any point ever again. See what happens then - I'm thinking she is a gold digger, using you for your resources (time, understanding, money.)