Jump to content

My lady said she needs time to experience

Recommended Posts

What's up yall, I'm new here. Here's the situation... I'm 22, my girlfriend is 18. We've been together for over a year. We started out as friends, with her wanting a relationship, however I did not want to be with her because of her age. As time went on, feelings changed and we became a couple. We were in love and everything was great. Her family damn near adopted me, and we have too many memorable moments together. We never had any problems or serious issues other than the occasional argument. She is the best girlfriend I have ever had, and the love and connection we shared was phenomenal.


She always tells me that I am the man of her prayers and how happy she is to be with me, and has been sending me these messages for a while even up until 2 days before she broke up with me. She says she wishes she would have met me later on in life because she would be married by now. But I am her first love, first kiss, first everything, and she says she has to know if Im supposed to be her last. She told me a couple days ago that she was breaking up with me in order to be free to experience, and see whats out there in order to have something to compare me to.


Not to brag, but i'm a good dude. I'm 22, am a corporate jet pilot, college graduate, devoted to God, respectful in every way, romantic, sexy, suave, and treated her the way my mother raised me to treat women, like queens. I took her flying in airplanes, romantic dinners, took care of her, always catered to her. Ladies, what exactly is she looking for? And why was she still sending me messages saying she was so in love just days before she made this decision? I know I have to let the caged bird go, and if it comes back...yeah yeah yeah, but do caged birds ever come back?


Without question I am confident that I am the cream of the crop..but I enjoy soo much what we had its hard to deal with the fact that she wants to leave. On top of that, I haven't called her or made any contact with her since, but she calls me every night late at night but I dont answer. She leaves messages saying she's just used to talking to me all the time, and some nights she's restless and can't go to sleep. If she needs time, and I'm giving it to her, what's up with that?I understand that it is a natural part of life for her to want to do this. Anyone have any similar experiences? Ladies who have been out in the world and have done what she's doing, what did you find out there? What can I expect? Let me know, I'm going through it. I miss my girl. I love her with all my heart. I know there are other fish out there, but this is the one I wanted to take home to dinner.


Even her family doesnt understand it. And no, there is no other man, she and her family assured me of that and I believe it. This is like my 5th heart break. Her first relationship. I feel she was blessed to get someone who never wanted her to feel the pain I felt from other women, why does she want to find out so bad? Write back, I just need some support from people who feel what im going through. Even though she's 18, she's very mature for her age. If you have something good, and it's not broken, it's better than ever..why do you give it up? When everyone wants the relationship you have, why do you let it go? It don't make no damn sense.

Link to comment

shes young, and thats pretty much a lot of it. you were her first, and now she wants to experience freedom. shes just curious. when i was young i thought i knew what love was, and thought i was in love a couple times. in truth i had know idea what it felt like to actually be in love. i was just caught up in the moment experiencing new things, and thats what shes feeling. i havnt had anyone tell me what shes told you though, so i dont know anything about whether shell come back. better get advice on that from someone else.

Link to comment

I think the key is that, despite her apparent maturity, she is only 18 and doesn't want to commit to anything.


I would go no contact and let her experience what life is like without you. In the meantime, assume that the relationship is over, get over her and move on. If she wants to come back at some point, then you can decide what you want to do.


Remember, that she has the right to decide who and what she wants. You may be the cream of the crop in many people's eyes, but it is her opinion that is the only one that counts. She is not a bad person, or wrong, because she may not want you.


You may also like to do a little self-analysis to see why this has happened again - perhaps there is something in you that is affecting your relationships - if so, then you need to identify what it is and fix it.

Link to comment

Well, you're being real strong and doing the right thing by doing No Contact. Stick to it. This will go one of two ways, either her feelings will grow stronger for you and she will come back and have to prove that she deserves your trust again (and it can't be easy for her to get back, she must earn it), or she's gone for good and nothing can be done. Let her make up her mind by staying out of sight. In the meantime, keep yourself busy with your things and talk to other girls. Casual conversation at the very least. It will help you take the pressure off the situation and you'll be better equiped to handle it.

Link to comment

I can understand what you are going through man. I've had my heart broken several times. Most recently- it was 3 weeks ago. My ex and I started offas friends, then became lovers. We had an amazing connection. She told me that I was the perfect guy for her, and that she wanted to be with me forever. She also told me she loved me the day she walked out the door. I just don't understand women. I tried to give her everything she could possibly want. We never argued. This was the best relationship I had ever had. I finally started to believe that love was possible- and real. But she is younger than me (23) and she doesn't know who she is yet. She is trying to figure out what she wants. She's going through a "quarter-life crisis". I still don't understand why she won't allow me to help her through this crisis. But, she wants to be alone right now, and she is now saying she isn't ready for a serious relationship. Don't let this girl toy with you- it's not fair for her to go running around, having her fun, while you suffer. If one day she tries to come back (which there is a good chance she will) you had better be firm with her.

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Create New...