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Have I been in love? or what do I call it and how do i descr

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Im must be the most confused person ever. I have know idea what to do or think. In highschool had a good friend, became more and he was my first. we had a child... we used to argue almost everyday. we were together for almost 3 yrs. but for the last of the five months he pushed me away. i told him i was ready for a long commitment but he wasnt. so in those 5 months someone was there for me and when my first(my daughters father) found out he said he realized that he wanted to marry me. but i told him i wanted to be with the new guy. so the new guy and i was together for 4 months until yesterday. the problem with me is that i was so in love with my first, but when i first got with the new guy i thoght i loved him.. but as i can see now i dont. and the feelings that im feeling i dont know what they r. so they make me think that i ever did love my first love. (i know this may seem so confusing but i wish i could have some type of machine to put whats ever in my head on this computer) Well the main thing is that they both did not fullfill my needs, and im not to sure what they are. i yearn for this great feeling from someone but i just cant stop thinking about it. and since ive only been with these 2 guys, it makes me feel and think that a guy cant understand me and my needs. so im thinking that i should turn to a girl. and i have never been with a girl... and the reason for this is that ive been around gay people all my life.. my mom is a girl and they have been together for a long time.. so im so confused... i want to look for a girlfriend. but ahhhhhhh... i just dont know what to write n e more.. to let u guys know whats goin on.. so i seen my first today and i know or just felt he dispises me cuz he said he would... but he told me today he doesnt.. and i dont know how i feel about him... its said that virgos' relationships are really mostly in there head so they i guess make up the fantasy in there head... so im not to sure what this is that im feeling... i cant tell if i love him or not... please everyone i really need all the help i can get.. and i really feel so alone and i dont want to be... both of these guy are in love with me.. but i dont know how i feel for them.. ok i know im confusing u guys cuz im so confused.. so plz try to help me in any way u can and quick plz.. i need this help.... ok thats enough until later...[/img]

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What you need to do is calm down! Your going threw a lot right now and it's obviously stressing you out to no end! If you don't know how you feel about these two then there is litte you can do. Genrally time will tell. There are other things I can think of but there is no garentee that it will work. Try imagening losing one of them at a time. How would you feel? Could you live with out that person?

Who do you want to raise your baby with? Who do you think would be the best father? Would you be willing to work the relationship out with this person?


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As hard as this sounds… you need to get away from them both for at least 6 months….


You need to call on friends and family in this hard time for support and be strong. It may turn out that neither of them is good for you. It's all about you and your child.


You need to put your kid first and make your kid your first priority. You may be single for years until you learn to be happy with who you are and your life. Until you get that in order nothing will ever really make sense!

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  • 2 weeks later...

Maybe I misread... but it sounds like you're looking for someone to give to you... to love and support you... because you don't want to work "ever"... my question is what are "you" prepared to give? You are a mom now and if no one else steps up to support you and your child, you may HAVE to work... that is just reality...


You seem very confused regarding both of these guys... meanwhile in the middle is a wonderful child... who needs a maternal/paternal figure in their life... what of that? My thinking is to spend some time alone... think about what "you"want to do with your life... for your betterment and the betterment of your child... self-preservation is Key... which means that no one is responsible for your happiness... but you!


It's hard to experience true love if all you're looking for is someone to fully service everything you want, financially, mentally, and emotionally... or someone to fulfill your idea of what love is...


Please forgive me if I sound harsh... I'm not trying to be...

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  • 2 weeks later...

thank you all for ur coments and i have thought about things. and things have gotten more confusing now than ever. someone else entered my life and im not to sure how i feel about them or how they feel about me. now both of us have 1 child each and he has 1 on the way... which things can get pretty crazy from here on out. but u cant help where ur feelings lead u. did i mention that i heard that girls from louisiana find a guy and get attached to them and then next thing u know the feelings that they had for them has gone away. so they leave them. i think this is true.. and my ex told me that(the second 1, not my daughters father). so i think its true cuz when he told me that i was like, "wow i had no idea". so and he said that since he thinks im like that, he says that he thinks i will never be able to love a guy cuz of that even tho maybe if the guy and i were meant to be. now how i feel about him is that i really dont even want to talk to him at all. i dont really want to be friends with him. he is really annoying. ok and guess what.. the guy whom i just found out he had feelings for me. well being around him makes me spend more time with my daughter. cuz i see how much he is always with his sons(he calls them both cuz they always been together and they r brothers but 2 diff dads) and how he cares for them makes me feel bad. but makes me want to spend more time with her. even my mom was like u need to be there for her now and stop turning ur back cuz when she gets older she may turn her back on me. well the new guy has helped me not knowingly. well i be looking for u guys, so i'll check back.. later and thanx

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I'm sure you do sweetie... please... concentrate on being a mom and self improvement right now in your life... you do these things and love will find you... you can't love anybody until you truly love yourself... be encouraged dear heart... you are young and have a lot of life ahead of you... make good choices now... in order to live a fulfilled life later...


Hell... boys aint goin' nowhere... :silly:

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