Had a revelation tonight...

[neewollah]

After breaking up with my ex-gf and getting convinced, by her, that she does not want me around, I noticed something, I'm alone.

 

Yes, thats the problem I'm a freaking loner, antisocial and maniac depresive! The pills arent working as they used to, and I just keep taking them because of the phisical dependency they developed, the shrink was no good, just a waste of my, excesive, free time. I'm pretty much alone, I know no one else except for the people @ work that I've managed to slowly get away from me because of my charming personality...

 

I'm a freaking joke and I'm sure God is having a good laugh, I've had plenty of chances to finally get rid of myself, accidents, I've been shot, more accidents... And I'm still around...

 

I'm sure the longer he keeps me in here, the harder he laughs, and I'm to freaking coward to put me out of my misery.

 

 

 

So here I am, helpless and without any chances of meeting someone else, not even friends.

 

 

 

Hope I die soon, I'm tired and sick of this. I can't stand it anymore. If I don't die soon all that is waiting for me is a long, boring, meaningless and lonely life. And that has already been all what I've had up to now, I don't want it anymore, I can't take it anymore!

 

Please angel of mercy, if you exist, take me away!

[Caldus]

Alright dude we can handle this better than that. What you can't meet new people? You have to start somewhere with all of this. It's not like we all didn't have to meet new people in order to not be alone anymore. Forgive yourself and move on.

[QTpie87]

suicide isn't the answer. I was suicidal and went to the hospital for like 2 weeks and when i came out I realized how much worse everything could be and how thankful I should be for every moment of my life. It's maybe an idea for you to go to the hospital if you are feeling that suicidal you know? I honestly think maybe you feel like you are better off dead but you don't really want to die, if you did then you wouldn't have posted here looking for advice and help. Im glad you came here though, cause I think I and everyone else here would rather try as much as possible to help you then have you die.

I hope you feel better soon, remember that nothing will stay bad forever unless you let it, met new people, the only way you fail is if you don't try at all.

good luck.

Qtpie87

[Süsser Tod]

I love how easy it is to say "get out there and meet new people, make new friends". It may be easy for most of you, but it ain't easy for me! I've been dealing with that for 26 years, and up to now I've been unable to make new friends easily.

 

I lack whatever is needed to meet people, to get new friends. It is really hard, almost impossible for me to do it. Only under very special circumstances and with very specific people I'm able to. I'm so charming that even here at work, no one wants to sit in front of me, and people who do, try not to talk to me.

 

And unfortunately I feel hopeless, I'm just too coward to end myself. By now I don't care if God wins, I just have had enough of what I dont need, and I don't want it anymore.

 

I used to at least have hope, everytime I had an accident or something like that I used to think "God loves me and wants me to be in here for some reason, that is why I'm alive", but right now I don't have any more hope left. All my hope has been used by now, just trying to survive, and by now I'm old and tyred, no more hope to keep me going anymore.

[Caldus]

It's not easy for me either, but how is one suppose to overcome their fears if they don't face them and how is one supposed to achieve their dreams in life if they never worked towards those dreams?