Chapter 3

[dias]

This new company I joined operates so differently. The selection process they have is absurd, there is so much screening. Once you get hired (which is not easy), you have to do 2 more technical interviews in order to be placed into a project. 

This is the first time I hear about a company interviewing people when they are already in the company. Ok I understand it's a big company and they want to make sure the client is satisfied with the consultant. Nonetheless, It's something they should have mentioned before they hire you, it was an intentional oversight. Most candidates would not agree with this process that's why they omitted this part.  

Essentially, how it works is, the company has many projects with different clients and, you as an engineer, you have to internally apply for some of them. The client interviews all the engineers who have applied and selects the most suitable one. Therefore, you compete with your colleagues about the position. It's like searching for a job again. I am pretty sure people who can't find a project are let go once the probation period is over. Grrr, this should have been mentioned before they hire you. 

I have done already 2 interviews with the client, but of course, he wants a third one. Like ***? I am not going for a CEO job. Jeez. 

 

[mylolita]

7 hours ago, dias said:

This new company I joined operates so differently. The selection process they have is absurd, there is so much screening. Once you get hired (which is not easy), you have to do 2 more technical interviews in order to be placed into a project. 

This is the first time I hear about a company interviewing people when they are already in the company. Ok I understand it's a big company and they want to make sure the client is satisfied with the consultant. Nonetheless, It's something they should have mentioned before they hire you, it was an intentional oversight. Most candidates would not agree with this process that's why they omitted this part.  

Essentially, how it works is, the company has many projects with different clients and, you as an engineer, you have to internally apply for some of them. The client interviews all the engineers who have applied and selects the most suitable one. Therefore, you compete with your colleagues about the position. It's like searching for a job again. I am pretty sure people who can't find a project are let go once the probation period is over. Grrr, this should have been mentioned before they hire you. 

I have done already 2 interviews with the client, but of course, he wants a third one. Like ***? I am not going for a CEO job. Jeez. 

 

It’s straight up bullsh*t Dias! 

I know so many people who entered envious positions in careers and companies who “omitted” information or straight up lied regarding skills, or blagged their way in. I’ve stopped feeling so righteous and prissy about these things. Large companies, or “prestigious” companies; we automatically think in so many ways they are going to know what they’re doing, and be organised in a professional way. From the Government to the food bank, you realise no one has a clue what the hell is going on, and everyone either pushes blame up the food chain, or down. 
 

Sorry, I am in one cynical mood this afternoon!!!

 

Eat, or be eaten, as they say.

 

Cheeky cheek! Expect no less!!!

 

(And just to add, in my mood this afternoon, that working is one highly, highly overrated thing. The dossers and the socialites are onto something!
 

We don’t really want money! What we really want, is TIME! ‘Cos God ain’t making anymore of it!) 
 

x

[dias]

Well, I can't do anything right now since I am in. The only thing I could do is to tell them that they should have mentioned during the hiring process how things work when you are already hired. What is the point though? The HR told me this is how it works(fullstop). Telling them it's unprofessional won't benefit me right now. It's not the first time the interviewer omits information about the job, it's pretty common actually, I just roll with it every time because, well, this is how things work. 

I talked to another engineer who joined with me and he had the same concerns. What is going to happen if you don't get into a project anytime soon? Do you get booted? Then I conversed with the manager again about this issue and he reassured me there is no such case blah blah... Go figure. We will see tomorrow in the 3rd interview. 

 

 

[dias]

Can’t meet a proper gal. The ones in the dating apps are usually nutcases. I have tried approaching girls outside (even on the street), got turned down immediately even though they were looking at me intensely. It seems everyone just wants attention.  Not that I can relate to the culture or have anything in common with most people but I try now and then. It gets lonely sometimes.

[Jibralta]

On 10/9/2023 at 2:03 AM, dias said:

It's like searching for a job again. I am pretty sure people who can't find a project are let go once the probation period is over. Grrr, this should have been mentioned before they hire you. 

At least your jobhunting skills will be on point when you decide to move on 😁

[dias]

Yay! I am the first from the newcomers to land a project. I passed the final interview today. Damn, 6 interviews in total. 3 to get hired and 3 to find a project. And 5 of them were technical. It was the most difficult hiring process I have ever experienced. 

[dias]

It does seem the internal relocation option is valid. The are requirements like working on a project for at least 13 months and have great references and such. I did fill in the relocation preferences form. I want to prepare them from now. That also means that aside from doing a great job I need to foster good relationships with my colleagues. It has to be more than the typical pleasantries unfortunately 😕.  Not my thing. I don’t like the kissing butts corporate sh*t. The only thing that saves me is that people can see I am somewhat ambitious and I could help them in the future. Anyway, fingers crossed.

 

I also applied to the green card lottery. You never know. Ha imagine that!

[Jibralta]

On 10/12/2023 at 10:05 AM, dias said:

I also applied to the green card lottery. You never know. Ha imagine that!

I have a friend who won it.... of course, there's a sizable chance that she's connected to the Russian mafia lol.

[dias]

23 hours ago, Jibralta said:

I have a friend who won it.... of course, there's a sizable chance that she's connected to the Russian mafia lol.

No such luck, I have to rely solely on good fortune! 

I never believed in "luck", I always believed we define our future with our work and our decisions. Not anymore. There is such thing as "luck", it's fortuitous circumstances that we have no control over (like when we have bad luck). Both good luck and bad luck exist. 

Usually for good things to happen it's a combination of work/action/preparation from our side + favorable circumstances. But sometimes there is also pure luck that we don't have to do anything. For instance, there is a radio station I listen to when I drive here in Athens, they call random telephone numbers, they ask you to tell them a phrase they mention on the radio throughout the day and if you tell it correctly you win 250+ Euros. Last Christmas they called me and I earned 280 Euros hehe. Ok it's not a significant amount but hey I didn't do anything! I always thought that it's either a scam or there is absolutely no chance on earth they would call me. But they did. And they did air the chat we had on the radio. I was driving with my brother late at night while listening to this radio station a couple of days later. I said to my brother "I think I know this voice, it reminds me of someone" He replied "Oh yes that's you"! LOL. 

Since then I started believing in luck. This is why participated in the lottery. Imagine that!!!

[dias]

Speaking of luck, I don't have any good luck in dating. I approached a Russian girl this afternoon, her dance class finishes just before mine starts. I knew she was fairly young, she looked about 20 years old with make-up, I am not into that young gals but she looked at me very intensely all the time so I thought what the heck. I asked her how old she was pretty quickly as I had a feeling she might not be 20. She was 15!! I was like ok you are too young, have a good evening. 

I need a bit of good luck in this part of my life because I don't see light in the tunnel. Problem is, now that I am satisfied with my career and I don't inflict such pressure on my self anymore, other aspects of my life resurface. Now, the need to find company has increased dramatically suddenly. Probably when I prioritized work this need was suppressed. I don't mean only sex, I mean company.

I need some providential celestial intervention to disperse the bad luck.  

[Batya33]

2 hours ago, dias said:

Speaking of luck, I don't have any good luck in dating. I approached a Russian girl this afternoon, her dance class finishes just before mine starts. I knew she was fairly young, she looked about 20 years old with make-up, I am not into that young gals but she looked at me very intensely all the time so I thought what the heck. I asked her how old she was pretty quickly as I had a feeling she might not be 20. She was 15!! I was like ok you are too young, have a good evening. 

I need a bit of good luck in this part of my life because I don't see light in the tunnel. Problem is, now that I am satisfied with my career and I don't inflict such pressure on my self anymore, other aspects of my life resurface. Now, the need to find company has increased dramatically suddenly. Probably when I prioritized work this need was suppressed. I don't mean only sex, I mean company.

I need some providential celestial intervention to disperse the bad luck.  

It's truly only partly luck/timing and even that  -many times it seems like luck but it's because of the person being proactive (or in one friend's case, following her mother's advice and looking ahead and around when walking in her city rather than down -which is how she saw her future husband smiling at her from across a street in the 1990s - I know the whole stranger/cold approach is odd but that's how she tells the story and the rest was.... history!)

That's so cool about the euros!!!

[dias]

Lolllllll 

[dias]

On 9/16/2023 at 8:50 AM, dias said:

 I will try to maintain contact now that I am leaving...usually communication fizzles out with time when you leave the company. That's life. We have a good time as long as this friendship lasts. 

Well, it didn't even last a day after I left. I've been reaching out but they are always "busy". The guys at the new company are a bit older with newborns so in a completely different stage in life. We work remotely anyway, we just met a couple of times and now who knows when we are going to meet again.  Another acquaintance seems to want to cut contact so here I am alone. I only have one childhood friend. I wouldn't  have anyone to talk to otherwise. 

Since the company allows us to work in other EU countries I got permission from the HR and my manager to work from somewhere else for a few weeks. I don't know the destination yet, I will have to roll the dice. Time to pack my stuff once again. It will be a few weeks for starters but I know it will be just the beginning of a new adventure. 

[Jibralta]

On 10/16/2023 at 4:06 PM, dias said:

Usually for good things to happen it's a combination of work/action/preparation from our side + favorable circumstances.

Have you every heard this saying?

Luck happens when opportunity meets preparation.

I like to keep it in mind.

On 10/16/2023 at 4:06 PM, dias said:

But sometimes there is also pure luck that we don't have to do anything.

So true. Sometimes, I just feel lucky. And then something fortunate happens to me!

On 10/16/2023 at 4:23 PM, dias said:

Now, the need to find company has increased dramatically suddenly. Probably when I prioritized work this need was suppressed. I don't mean only sex, I mean company.

This happened to me, too. But it was before I got my career together--it actually happened in graduate school, when I was in the very beginning stages of my career change. I think it had more to do with my age and maturity level. I was done with the merry-go-round of youth. It gets boring and meaningless, you know. I had less patience for stupid relationships. I wanted someone to share my experiences with. And I did find that person. It didn't take very long, once I realized what I wanted. But there was a bit of a learning process, surprisingly. And some bumps and bruises along the way.

[Batya33]

3 hours ago, dias said:

The guys at the new company are a bit older with newborns so in a completely different stage in life.

Please don't be this dismissive. My husband was the father of a newborn and had many friends who were older/younger/single/married/kids - no kids.

[dias]

11 hours ago, Batya33 said:

Please don't be this dismissive. My husband was the father of a newborn and had many friends who were older/younger/single/married/kids - no kids.

I understand, it is though, a different stage in life. They have different priorities than going out with colleagues who will meet once or twice every 6 months. I get it, it's natural. 

15 hours ago, Jibralta said:

Have you every heard this saying?

Luck happens when opportunity meets preparation.

I like to keep it in mind.

So true. Sometimes, I just feel lucky. And then something fortunate happens to me!

This happened to me, too. But it was before I got my career together--it actually happened in graduate school, when I was in the very beginning stages of my career change. I think it had more to do with my age and maturity level. I was done with the merry-go-round of youth. It gets boring and meaningless, you know. I had less patience for stupid relationships. I wanted someone to share my experiences with. And I did find that person. It didn't take very long, once I realized what I wanted. But there was a bit of a learning process, surprisingly. And some bumps and bruises along the way.

Good to hear that. Gives me a bit of hope. Fingers crossed something similar would happen for me too. It knocked me sideways. I don't know why. I just need and want company. 

[Batya33]

54 minutes ago, dias said:

I understand, it is though, a different stage in life. They have different priorities than going out with colleagues who will meet once or twice every 6 months. I get it, it's natural. 

Yes and when I was in that exact situation I made accommodations -took commuter trains out to the burbs to see my friends who had kids, didn't expect them to be available to meet with colleagues after work, etc.  I was in that situation from around 1991-2009.  My boss from 1996-98 was a high level exec with young kids so he'd leave by 7 and literally run to catch his train to the burbs. I have always been friends with people at all stages of life different from mine -especially since I was in my 40s by the time I married and had a kid - so it was really important to me not to forego friendships based on stages.  And I still don't -I don't actively seek out mom friends and never have.  

But I totally agree with you -if it's just an acquaintance from work people with kids are likely not going to prioritize acquaintances if the only time they're available is when they have to get home to be with their kids.  I won't go out at night anymore if I can help it. I went out at night regularly from 1980-2009 or so and often worked late at night. I have two social events at night next weekend and dreading it because of the timing and the consequences to my sleep/health.

Just don't dismiss out of hand -if you really connect with someone don't make assumptions about stages- assume you can make it work and make compromises.  JMHO.

[dias]

This month has been so stressful with the new job...

I might be the only one with a project from the newcomers but it's so overwhelming. There was no handover so I have to read blocks of code to get the gist of what is happening + meeting virtually 20+ people from different countries to get information about the project. My manager told me I am already doing great and I am like yeah but I am stressed as f*ck. 

Good things: I passed the exam for a certification I need for work with 95% this morning. Second, a gal from the American national center of women's innovation reached out because they needed help with something technical and we had a call, I hope I helped them a bit. She found me through my Youtube channel. Imagine that. 

Bad thing: I literally have nobody to talk to when my childhood friend is not available. Literally nobody outside of work. I am tired of going out alone to meet girls (which is essentially a job). I am about to explode mentally. I need to travel asap to change scenery. I will book a flight asap. I don't know where yet.

[Batya33]

Can you get a sort of mini break in the meanwhile ? 

[dias]

1 hour ago, Batya33 said:

Can you get a sort of mini break in the meanwhile ? 

Unfortunately no..... I joined the company this month and this project last week. It was the whole process that it was so stressful (the interviews) and the fact they threw me in at the deep end as soon as I joined the project + the preparation for the certificate + a presentation. Put it all together and I looked like I was hit by a truck these days. 

I am not going to take a break but now that the certificate is out of the way, I will only focus on the project. No YouTube videos for a while until I recover.  I believe working from another country would help me a bit, it will be a break, at least on the weekends.  

 

[dias]

 

[dias]

Packed my bags and took the bus to Thessaloniki which is the second biggest city in Greece (north Greece). I needed to hit the road again, I was about to explode. I don't have any concrete plan, I am thinking about staying here for a week or so and then maybe take the plane to somewhere else in Europe. It's is very very rainy today so not the best weather but better than getting depressed in Athens. The best thing about this job that gives me so much stress is that I can work remotely. I am going to take advantage of that. 

I walk with my backpack in the rain and I feel good. I am thinking "this is what I was born to do". 

[Jibralta]

On 11/2/2023 at 3:24 PM, dias said:

 

Interesting about the geographical accident. I'm glad he bought twitter. The less people like Elon Musk, the more I like him.

[dias]

I found a nice cocktail bar by the sea I really like. It also has a nice bar (not only tables) which is good if you want to approach women. I went there every day the last 3 days. I offered to buy a drink to some ladies every time but no much luck. Not my lucky days. Funnily enough, yesterday I was sitting on a bench eating gyro when a girl sat next to me. Ok I thought that's a good sign and I started a conversation. She was from a small town and had a funny accent lol. Girls from small towns are the best, much more normal and approachable, no stupid princess attitude. We chatted for half an hour and I offered to buy her a cocktail but she said she was actually waiting for her date to arrive. Jeez, give me a break. When you are alone meeting girls is like going fishing. 

I am leaving tomorrow as staying in a hotel is not affordable for too long. I am not sure what do. I might go back to Athens as I have some things to finish there. Dunno I will see. It's not that fun working remotely though as I spend most of my day inside the hotel working. Kind of negates the point. It's good for a change of scenery of course but ain't cheap. 

 

 

[Batya33]

4 hours ago, dias said:

We chatted for half an hour and I offered to buy her a cocktail but she said she was actually waiting for her date to arrive.

LOL so she didn't act like a princess just had amnesia lol (I mean I think it's ok she chatted with you but a half hour is a bit much with a strange man without mentioning much sooner she's waiting for her date).  I grew up in a major city and lol never had a princess attitude-neither did my sister.  I did know a couple of people from small towns and typically they didn't date much as adults -they married someone from their town and met those people by high school.  Nothing at all wrong with that.

I also knew many in my city who had moved there to get away from small towns and broaden their horizons in every way including culturally/diversity etc. 

I'm sorry dating is so frustrating/meeting people but maybe step back for a sec when you find yourself doing the cop out thing of generalizing - it's ultimately self-sabotaging because you'll assume stuff you shouldn't be.  You assumed this small town gal was well intentioned - I mean -she might be but I think she enjoyed the flattery and didn't want it to end by telling you right away she was waiting for her "date."