Eternal optimist when it comes to love * Warning May Trigger*

[limichelle]

You would think after being raped recently I will never want to date or look at another man again.  It’s the opposite. 
 

I’m not ready to date by no means but I haven’t given up on the idea of love. I think I never will. I know inherihently, I have a lot to offer and will enjoy being with someone. 
 

Im looking at the spring for seriously finding someone and being back on dating sites. 
 

I have goals though before I can do this. My weight loss goals slightly changed. After the trauma occurred I decided I’m not in the right headspace for weight loss surgery. 
 

I took a month off of the gym to heal and I’m going back Tuesday for personal training. So I’m doing this the natural way. 
 

I’m being realistic about my expectations of what I want in life. To be honest I was never the one to set out a list of requirements about a guys appearance. Like he has to be 6’1 and have tattoos….no I was never that way.

 

If anything I look more for the character of the person. He needs to have patience and be genuine, respectful and honest. Basic right?  To me it means everything the guy have a lot of those basic traits.

 

Looks honestly never mattered. I just want the one who makes me smile.

 

so what I’m trying to say is I have and never will give up on love. 
 

I don’t think the Rapist could take that apart of me away. 
 

I still believe in the goodness of someone’s heart. 
 

 

[Seraphim]

The same for me. I never gave up on finding the right man despite being molested as a kid and raped as an adult. 
 

Just look for someone of the right character and take your time. ❤️

[Batya33]

Good for you! I'm glad you shared that and I hope it felt good to write out your goals.  I didn't look for love but I looked for a husband -which included love and passion but also compatible values, standards and goals.  I do like the ring of "looking for love" of course!

(In case this helps -my 12 year old has shared that he knows he will not get a date or a girlfriend until he has underarm hair, so he's on the lookout for underarm hair).

[catfeeder]

Dear Limichelle,

I'm so glad to see such a declaration from you, and I can appreciate that this is an important thing to put into words and post.

Consider yourself heard by the universe as well as a stranger who joins with you in affirming your intrinsic and unalterable value as well as your capacity to give and receive love.

(((Big HUG))) to you, darling!
Cat

[kim42]

I'm so glad to read this, I've been sexually assaulted several times and also had a very traumatic experience with my ex, and I've been working on my myself a lot recently, thanks for sarin your positive  mindset! 

[Sonneblom]

On 9/12/2021 at 12:08 AM, limichelle said:

You would think after being raped recently I will never want to date or look at another man again.  It’s the opposite. 
 

I’m not ready to date by no means but I haven’t given up on the idea of love. I think I never will. I know inherihently, I have a lot to offer and will enjoy being with someone. 
 

Im looking at the spring for seriously finding someone and being back on dating sites. 
 

I have goals though before I can do this. My weight loss goals slightly changed. After the trauma occurred I decided I’m not in the right headspace for weight loss surgery. 
 

I took a month off of the gym to heal and I’m going back Tuesday for personal training. So I’m doing this the natural way. 
 

I’m being realistic about my expectations of what I want in life. To be honest I was never the one to set out a list of requirements about a guys appearance. Like he has to be 6’1 and have tattoos….no I was never that way.

 

If anything I look more for the character of the person. He needs to have patience and be genuine, respectful and honest. Basic right?  To me it means everything the guy have a lot of those basic traits.

 

Looks honestly never mattered. I just want the one who makes me smile.

 

so what I’m trying to say is I have and never will give up on love. 
 

I don’t think the Rapist could take that apart of me away. 
 

I still believe in the goodness of someone’s heart. 
 

 

I have to say, that your optimism and defiance in spite of all that has happened to you is really inspiring! I hope you find exactly what you are looking for, no matter how basic . Keep up that amazing spirit and don't let anyone get in the way of that. And I am truly sorry that this happened to you.