Message from ex

[Mike5]

So while I was posting about my abandonment issues today, whadya know, the ex messages.

 

"How are you? Where are you?" Attached with a photo of a cat next door. (She knows I like cats.)

 

It all feels a lie, though. A big steaming turd of a trap. Exs should only text with "I'm sorry. I made a huge mistake. Let's talk."

 

I'm pleased to say that so far I don't feel like replying, although whether I'll hold out is another matter.

[smackie9]

Don't reply. The silence will send a strong and clear message. Delete/block so she can't contact you again...let's make this final so you can move on quicker.

[sputnik123]

hello Mike,

 

Smackie is bang on the money, as always! :)

[boltnrun]

She must not have been able to find anyone else to bully.

 

I agree, delete the message, delete her contact info and then block her number, her email and any messaging platforms so she can't continue to try to bully you.

[No1]

You are going thru the normal moments of grief and healing. You will notice your emotions swing like a pendellum. One moment it could swing to anger, sadness, bargaining, confusion and a whole bag of other emotions. But eventually it will swing to acceptance. As you heal and times goes on and with your hard work, it will stay there longer and longer until it eventually stays there and then pendellum goes away.

Remember that she broke up with you and she let you go. It is over. If/When she texts its really not for you, its for her. She wants to ease her guilt so she wants to make sure that you are okay.

Im not saying never contact her, block her.. My view is, contact her only when you are strong enough to handle it. If you feel anxiety, blood pressure goes up, hearts starts racing just thinking of talking to her, then you are not ready. In time when you heal, if you want, then you can say hi, but until then, just work on you. My two cents

[Mike5]

The photo of the cat, it was taken from the flat we were planning on moving into in March before she blew my head off.

 

I can't figure is it gross insensitivity or mind games. I suspect it's the former which makes it even worse.

[Carus]

It's her going through her own separation anxiety.

 

Read my thread and be careful.

 

Carus*

[Mike5]

Thanks, Carus. I'm uber-suspicious. Of course being human, the brain got a little rush of the old drug, not much, though. It quickly turned to sadness.

 

She may as well have just texted:" Hey, here's the lovely place we looked at! Guess what? It's great - and even better without you!"

[Carus]

Yep. "I drove a knife into your chest. I'm just contacting you to drive it a bit deeper"..... :-/