Long Distance Relationship/Trust Issues

[Isabelle189]

Hello everyone,

 

My boyfriend and I have been together for 1 year and a few months. I'm in my mid 20's and he's in his early 30s. We're in a serious relationship and are thinking about engagement and marriage. The problem is trust; I don't trust my boyfriend that much. He has a lot of female friends and on social media, I see a lot of females leaving "kissy" and heart emojis on his page. They also respond in regards to what he posts such as "congrats boo" and "have fun boo." Most of these are accompanied with the "kissy" emojis. Another thing is that he's still close to his ex whom he dated for a year and 2 months. Initially, he had lied to me and told me they dated only for 5 months. He told me this when we were in the same state for vacation and I had wanted to visit his friends who were in that state, his ex being one of them. We never went btw because he didn't want to meet them, plus we had limited time. A few days ago when we were talking about our pasts, he finally told me it was a year and 2 months. He told me he talks to her every now and then, but I feel like they talk more than that.

 

He also has a lot of female friends. We recently got into a huge argument to the point of us almost breaking up. One of his female "best friends," lets call her Alex, was going around telling people that the two were "keeping things open." When I asked him how long the two were hanging out for people to start asking questions, he told me it was when she would post on Snapchat and social media or when they went out as a group with friends to eat out. Or when he would host game nights at his house and she would post it on Snapchat. I kept questioning him and he told me she was "crazy" and that he couldn't give me an answer to rationalize what she did. And that she may have been motivated by his higher economic status. Basically, his answer is that he doesn't know what's going on in these girl's heads. The same answer when I asked him about why those girls are leaving those comments and emojis. Alex is and was dating a guy who beats her at the time of this. The guy cheated on her with another woman and had a baby and yet Alex is still with him.

 

Please share your thoughts.

[Keyman]

Out of interest, how did you two meet and how often are you in the same place together?

[Isabelle189]

We met at an annual event that's meant to entertain and get people more involved in the community, and later on he got a hold of me on Facebook and we started talking from there and eventually led to our first date. For as long as we have dated, we've only seen each other on 5 different occasions. Each occasion lasting about 3 to 7 days.

[Wiseman2]

Unfortunately you talk more about all his other friends and exes than about seeing each other. Are you motivated by this?

she may have been motivated by his higher economic status.

[Isabelle189]

No. I'm not motivated by it. I brought this up because he's told me on several occasions that those females are motivated by his social economic status when I confronted him about the questionable posts they left on his social media.

[Wiseman2]

Unfortunately he seems to love the attention. Is he usually this conceited?

he's told me on several occasions that those females are motivated by his social economic status when I confronted him about the questionable posts they left on his social media.

[Isabelle189]

I wouldn't say he's conceited but he's very confident in what he believes and does.