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i just got out of a 10 year relationship. he physically moved out a week ago but we have been roommates for about 2 yrs. there was no relationship, no romance, no touch, no feelings. i am starving for attention in that sense and im not sure what to do. i have been so alone for so long. i tried to get close just to get rejected over and over. my self confidence is down the toilet but im still young and i want to feel like a woman again. when is too soon to start dating? what is the right amount of time to get back out there. he was my first serious relationship.i really dont know what to do. i feel like ive already mourned the relationship. i mean he has not touched me in over 3 months. and before that it had been 3 or 4 months. even holding my hand or hugging me seemed like a chore to him. now he has moved out and i feel like this is me time. i wanna be happy. i wanna feel attractive but when is the right time?

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I was with my ex for ten years and the intimacy stopped after seven years. So for the last three years Of our relationship it was practically dead. I started talking to someone online two months after the break up and that was a big mistake. My heart was in turmoil you would be surprised what you still hold onto.


It's taken me two years to fully move on. Sure I started dating last February a date here and there. Then took a break and decided it was time for me. Then out of curiosity I went on POF online dating site and I'm going on a date with someone Monday. This time it's different how I know? When I think of my ex nothing is there and my heart has fully healed.


I'm ready!


You will be ready when you know you are ready. I can't give you a set time or date. Right now I would focus on you, what you want and need.


When you come out of a long term relationship like that you lost apart of you In that relationship.


Like I said for me it's been two and a half years and I'm now finally ready.


Give it time.



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It takes me AT LEAST a year to get over a relationship; that doesn't mean to say I don't go on odd dates during that time, but I think it's best to be honest about not being available for anything serious.


Just be gentle with yourself and let your grieving for your relationship bubble up in its own time.

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