hrb23 Posted April 28, 2017 Share Posted April 28, 2017 My brother was in that situation. He basically had to choose between his girlfriend and his family (his girlfriend hit our mother during an argument and I jumped in to defend our mother). He chose the girlfriend. He didn't speak to us for TWO years. Sadly, it turned out we were right. The girlfriend (who he married) turned out to be an absolute psycho who did things like hit herself to cause bruises, then called 911 to report he'd hit her. He had to spend a lot of time mending fences with the family. It was NOT worth it. But it's amazing and scary to think of how difficult a decision it is. You'd think it would be tough (or at least I did) but when it came to it I really didn't know what to do. Fortunately I still have them on side. Some of these people have a way of manipulating us a long long way away from our core beliefs. What we are doing by getting over them truly is amazing which is why I suggest people never be discouraged or too hard on themselves when they make mistakes. Unfortunately for OP eventually people are going to start getting tired of offering further advice if you don't take what given to you originally. You gotta either listen to us or sleep in the bed you make yourself. You know the right thing to do. Link to comment
jonnyboy12 Posted May 5, 2017 Author Share Posted May 5, 2017 UPDATE So we have been texting for the past week, chat was a bit dry for first 2 days but its starting to flow!! We met for an icecream that was cool then we went and done some fun stuff in the arcade a couple days later. Its going to take time, she says she still loves me but she just doesn't feel that "oomph" she felt before so its really about meeting casual, talking and seeing where it goes. We were flirting etc so its not like "friendzone" or anything. I am alot happier and Im going to stick at it and hope for the best. If it doesnt work then you guys were all right but for now, im following my heart because I love this girl more than anything in the world. Thanks for all the advice, Ill update you guys soon. Peace out! Link to comment
Loralora Posted May 5, 2017 Share Posted May 5, 2017 I hope everything works out for the best; if not someone else special in the future will come along..with time & patience everything is possible! Link to comment
jonnyboy12 Posted May 8, 2017 Author Share Posted May 8, 2017 Well then, I wish I listened to everyone! Not just people here but my family and friends.....lastnight she randomly text me out the blue and said "we need to sort this" she basically said "we cant meet and text because I'm leading you on, I just don't want to be with you anymore, you were an amazing boyfriend and I'll probably never find anyone like you but I just don't want a relationship anymore". Didn't get upset, told her I was disappointed that she even entertained speaking to me and meeting me multiple times for the past week, said I wish her all the best, gave her a kiss on the head and left. We live and learn folks. Been a month since the breakup now, I still feel very strong about her but now this really has been the nail in the coffin, I tried to win her back...atleast i can say I tried. Just clearly not meant to be. Time to start this healing process for good. Link to comment
LondonMan33 Posted May 8, 2017 Share Posted May 8, 2017 Well then, I wish I listened to everyone! Not just people here but my family and friends.....lastnight she randomly text me out the blue and said "we need to sort this" she basically said "we cant meet and text because I'm leading you on, I just don't want to be with you anymore, you were an amazing boyfriend and I'll probably never find anyone like you but I just don't want a relationship anymore". Didn't get upset, told her I was disappointed that she even entertained speaking to me and meeting me multiple times for the past week, said I wish her all the best, gave her a kiss on the head and left. We live and learn folks. Been a month since the breakup now, I still feel very strong about her but now this really has been the nail in the coffin, I tried to win her back...atleast i can say I tried. Just clearly not meant to be. Time to start this healing process for good. You have lost me with that post Johny , You have said she randomly text you out of the blue and basically told you it was over , How did you give her a kiss on the head and leave, she says in the text we can,t meet and text .. I am lost here johny . Link to comment
jonnyboy12 Posted May 8, 2017 Author Share Posted May 8, 2017 You have lost me with that post Johny , You have said she randomly text you out of the blue and basically told you it was over , How did you give her a kiss on the head and leave, she says in the text we can,t meet and text .. I am lost here johny . Sorry, she text me to tell me "we need to sort this out" and we met up to talk Link to comment
LondonMan33 Posted May 8, 2017 Share Posted May 8, 2017 well the best thing to do is leave her alone now , do your own thing , it is the only way in life . no matter how much you want her you have to fight that feeling until the day comes you no longer need to fight it. Always remember the next time you think you need to contact her if you do she will dislike you for it more and more if you keep doing it. If you keep silent and don,t bother her you will recover a lot quicker , at the same time she will probably miss you by doing that. it does not mean she will contact you but she will think a lot more about you than if you end up constantly contacting her. its the hardest game in the world to play. its part of life and gives you experience for the future. Link to comment
jonnyboy12 Posted May 8, 2017 Author Share Posted May 8, 2017 well the best thing to do is leave her alone now , do your own thing , it is the only way in life . no matter how much you want her you have to fight that feeling until the day comes you no longer need to fight it. Always remember the next time you think you need to contact her if you do she will dislike you for it more and more if you keep doing it. If you keep silent and don,t bother her you will recover a lot quicker , at the same time she will probably miss you by doing that. it does not mean she will contact you but she will think a lot more about you than if you end up constantly contacting her. its the hardest game in the world to play. its part of life and gives you experience for the future. Yeha I know man, got to move on. Just always promised her I'd never give up and I'm not one to break a promise but shes forced it. Can't do anymore. Time to get on with my life 100% now. Link to comment
jonnyboy12 Posted May 8, 2017 Author Share Posted May 8, 2017 I also really stupidly bought her favorite perfume that only comes out in summer because I promised I'd get her it, I thought things were going good......£60 later AND i ordered it to her house. I really am stupid at times! Whatever eh, she can keep it and think of me everytime she sprays it Link to comment
jonnyboy12 Posted May 8, 2017 Author Share Posted May 8, 2017 Also injured myself last weekend so cant even go to the gym or go on runs.....really frustrating being stuck inside Link to comment
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