i am obsessed with being like another person

[Butterflyxx]

i don't like to admit this, as i feel weak and stupid, but i really want to change myself.

there is this girl in particular that i really really admire. i know her because one of my male friends is a friend of hers, and for the past two years i have looked up and admired her. (in the past i have always admired girls who are confident and self assured).

i have her on social media, her family is rich, she has lots of friends, she does well in school, she is confident, has nice clothes & goes to a very posh boarding school.

i on the other hand, is clingy, insecure, skinny, don't have many friends (soon to hopefully change as i'm going to university in september) & my family aren't rich.

 

i so badly wish i had her attributes, i wish i had her confidence and i am just so envious of her and her life.

 

i hate some aspects of my personality so badly, such as my insecurity, low self esteem & clingy behaviour especially to my boyfriend.

on the other hand, i like the fact i am organised, intelligent & doing well in school.

i don't have any hobbies as i honestly don't know what interests me, i'm not exactly a sporty person, and i wish i put on more weight.

what do i do to improve my life?

i want to stop being so insecure & thinking negatively about myself and my appearance.

[jujusamples]

First, you should shift your focus from "what you don't have" to "What YOU DO have!"

 

It's normal to admire another person, but just don't let it become an obsession. You probably have skills and other things that she doesn't have. Social media isn't a good place to compare either. What most people don't understand is EVERYONE ONLY posts all the good things about them. They will never posts anything negative. They will also post the best photos and etc. The girl you admire does have bad days and she does have faults. Understand that no one is perfect no matter how perfect their lives seems.

 

The best way to gain confidence is to exercise. I can't stress that enough, not only will you feel better, you will look better. If you want to look fuller, do weight training. Adding muscles will help you look fuller and toner. You will get stronger will boost your confidence.

[Batya33]

How well do you know her? Do you mostly know about her attributes through social media? Do you know if she always was confident and self-assured? What do you know about her daily life?

[Matt3939]

Just be yourself that's all you can do. Nothing wrong with bettering yourself. You are viewing this person thru your eyes. Things she wants you to see. Good luck

[Dahl]

i am organised, intelligent & doing well in school.

 

And insightful, aware, plugged in, willing and able to self-improve and evolve, articulate, sensitive - and that's just what I see from your initial post!

 

I'm with Matt. Focus on you - you seem like a very special person to be, in your own right!

[adaba063]

And insightful, aware, plugged in, willing and able to self-improve and evolve, articulate, sensitive - and that's just what I see from your initial post!

 

I'm with Matt. Focus on you - you seem like a very special person to be, in your own right!

 

How do the people who matter see you?

 

Give yourself a big hug & kiss your image in the mirror! You are worth it!

 

all the best,