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Okay guys, I need an outside opinion.


I just got into a new relationship with this guy. And, just like everyone else, this guy has a past of other people he's been with. There's this one person that struck me as odd as soon as he told me about them and the way they keep in contact now. Long story short, my boyfriend got drunk (this was before he met me) and his best friend hooked him up with this one person; they did that for a while, and the rest is history.


As of now, they are roommates in college, and ever since I heard about it, I immediately became unsettled. Personally, I don't see the point in keeping around ex-flings. So, he (on his own accord) promised me he'd move out next semester to be away from this one person. I was a bit as ease after that.


Today, he came to me with a concern. He had told me that a couple of friends that this person knew were moving out of a apartment and seeing if my boyfriend and this old FWB would move in together to keep the apartment occupied (My boyfriend likes this offer because he's been wanting to get off campus). How this makes sense, I don't know.


But immediatlely, I got fed up again and it led to another argument. I just don't see the point in continuing to live with someone who shouldn't have a significance in your life. I think it's weird and it makes me kind of uneasy.


I also feel a little like I got smacked in the face, coming up to me with this idea he was offered is like saying, "Hey, I know I made a promise but I want to break it now because this awesome deal came up!"


Like, honestly, what was the point in even asking me if I'd be okay with breaking a promise?


Please help guys, do you agree or disagree with me? I need insight.

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How long have you been dating? Is it a ldr, how often do you see each other? Do you think he's jerking you around and they are more like roommates-with-benefits?


We've been dating for two months now. I don't think he is but I still think it's stupid to be asking someone to break a promise. I met the person this weekend when I met his friends and the person is alright, but it still doesn't make it any better.

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After 8 wks of dating it's not up to you to decide who his friends are and what his living arrangements are. If it makes you uncomfortable, end it.

We've been dating for two months now. I met the person this weekend when I met his friends and the person is alright, but it still doesn't make it any better.
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yup. take it or leave it.


if involvement of exs is a dealbreaker for you, and he keeps choosing to live with one, you can leave. staying when he has shown that he wants to live with her is agreeing to him living with her. so agreeing, and yet nagging him for living with her is in the unfair and unproductive territory.


to some it isn't an immediate dealbreaker and it would depend on the ex and the trust, but seeing as despite having met her and thinking she's okay it still bothers you, i don't think you can talk yourself into being comfortable with something you're clearly not.


it's only been two been two months, why is "just end it" such a shocking idea? at this point you're discovering incompatibilities, and deciding whether you can coexist happily or not.


for what it's worth, no exs would be a hard rule for me as well. but then i wouldn't date someone after finding out they live with their ex fwb.

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He's being pretty open to you, which I think is a good sign....but I don't know.


On one hand, good roommates are hard to find! I get finding someone you get along living with and wanting to keep that dynamic. Roommates are just terrible all around haha, but I am very picky with my living space.


But I don't know how comfortable I would be if my SO was living with a former FWB. I would feel a bit weird.


So I'm not helpful, tricky situation. Does he have anyone else he could live with?

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