The Road

[ut03n9]

I read the books and the forums and they tell me to move on and live your life. How can I when you were my life. I view you as my soulmate and you view me as "repulsive". I walk around with a weight on my chest and spirit that blocks out any other thought. It's the only thing I feel, this grief is crushing me and there is no escape. I wrote my suicide notes, said goodbye to my dogs, filled the tub with warm water and got in. when it came time to open my veins I chickened out. Death would be the easy way out, it would not have me. This is my 2nd divorce and I know the road I must travel, I just can't do it again. I know the pain of it, the thirst for companionship, the unforgiving pavement the emptiness and coldness of this road . How do I tell my family I failed again, how do I find someone else to love. How do I love myself again. This time I have no friends to lean on, no father to speak with. I hate this road, this place of darkness and dispair

[melancholy123]

This has been posted twice now.