Is it ok to feel agistated?

[Kevyn]

Ok,

I'm "hanging out" with this guy (his terms). And we're getting to be good friends. The problem is... he waits until the last minute to ask me to go do something. I mean the very last minute.

Now, I like him and would possibly like for this relationship to progress with time. But I want someone who is going to think about me during the week. Someone who will ask me during the week what my weekend plans are to make sure they include him.

Now, he has a younger daughter that he has every other weekend, so our free time consists of every other weekend. Our time is limited as it is.

From the way I see it, I can:

1. Keep my mouth shut and just enjoy our time together (but I'll worry that he'll take for granted that I'll always be available when he calls.)

2. Let him know how I feel (but risk losing our friendship because I will start sounding like a girlfriend.)

Does anyone have any suggestions? I do not want this to be a deal breaker in the relationship, but I want to know that he's not just killing time until someone better comes along.

[annie24]

Go with option #3: He already knows he has every other weekend free, so that is no excuse for not calling you a few days in advance. Don't put your life on hold for him! Make plans to go out with your girlfriends on saturday night. If he calls saturday at 4 PM, tell him you already have plans (nicely!) If he likes you, he'll get the hint he has to call you earlier. By taking him up for last-minute dates, it seems like you have nothing better to do than to sit by the phone and wait for his call. so, get out there and get busy! And, if he gets angry and frustrated by your not being available at his beckon call, then call it quits with him. good luck!

[Mun]

Honey,

The best way to get someone to stop asking you out the last minute is to stop accepting dates at the last minute. Your time is valuable girl, he needs to plan ahead. Don't argue with him about it, don't even bring it up, just do it. Actions speak louder than words. A few times of you letting him know politely that you have already made plans and that man will start calling earlier in the week just to make sure he can get to see you. Now if he doesn't and he drops you.. you will know that you were only a convenience for him and he did not care very much to begin with... but you will have some answers.

 

Like I said, don't give him attitude. Don't even tell him he should have called sooner. Just tell him you would have loved to but you already have plans. The go out with your girls.

 

Never be afraid to lose a man. You will only lose yourself if you are. A guy that likes you is going to treat you special and value your company. Is this him? Find out before you invest any more of your time.

[Jimbo10]

I think in this case, you gotta play a little hard to get. When he calls last miniute, say you can't, you made plans Xdays ahead of time.

 

If he is interested, he'll figure it out quickly he can't just use you as a last miniute date, it isn't fair to you, and he can't go on thinking that way. He'll learn, I betcha he picks up quickly too!