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Don't know what to do!


Puffdraggy1

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Me and now ex girlfriend have been together for 3 an a half years. the first say 3 years or more have been nothing but amazing with her, done so much together and have been nothing but full of love. but even from the start I found little things odd like gut feelings and stuff, and within 4 months I found out she was flirting with some guy over Facebook. then not long after that I found out she had sex with some guy within a week of us going out, and over the years I've caught her out like another 5 or 6 times flirting with people over Facebook, until the last time I found out and kicked her out. then I didn't see her for like 3 days until she came over and talked and came to the conclusion that if were gonna work this out I think we need to just be friends for a while and go from there, and start fresh. but the last week we went to this party and we were drinking, and she asked me out so I said yes but later in that night some bloke kissed her and I was pretty upset about that and the day after we started arguing again. and now we're just friends after I found out too that she's kissed some bloke she works with, and so now were sleeping In different rooms, I don't know what to do because I just can't turn off loving her. and she's really not as bad a person as what this is making her out to be I realise we're only young still, I just need some help in what my options are here?

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Both of you are too immature to be in a relationship.

 

Her for engaging with other males/flirting and who knows, maybe cheating WHILE in a relationship.

 

And YOU for staying with her. Why woudl you want to be with a girl that gets around, flirts around......she sounds like trouble, keep your distance and stay away from her.

 

And you should already know there is no such a thing as male/female friendships...especially with Ex's.....

 

Put her where she belongs, in the past/erased from your memory.

 

Find a girl that won't give you drama or have relations with other males while in a relationship with YOU.

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This situation sounds really odd...so she is consistently seeking attention from other men (you put up with it) and then you break up and get back together, but only as friends? And on top of that, you kick her out...but then at the end of your post you are sleeping in different rooms. This sounds so dysfunctional. I definitely agree that both of you must be young because this all sounds incredibly immature. But you are the one that is in control of your own destiny and by staying in this relationship you are allowing her to continue with this behavior. You need to make some choices about what you want.

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Well... you're obviously not happy with her flirting, etc... so, for how long do you plan on living with it?

 

If I am with someone, I am not out there kissing other guys n flirting with more...

She either has problems sticking with just one man, or she's not happy with what she's got.

 

what are your options? Either remove yourself from this deranged relationship or stick it out.. to be kicked in the face again.

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I haven't been perfect either since I've said some pretty hurtful things after what she's done but in no way I feel I deserve the way I've been treated. We're both the black sheep of our family's and have had pretty bad up-bringings, is it possible to salvage this relationship and start fresh? she said shed do anything like she's deleted all her social media, offered to look for another job and get rid of her phone. I know she hates herself for what she's done is one last chance in order or is it to dysfunctional to fix now?

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Have you tried to talk about her flirting and seeking attention from other men? I mean to be honest, if she was satisfied in the relationship, she wouldn't be doing that. I am afraid that she isn't letting you walk away now because she is waiting to get over you and find someone new before she leaves you.

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Yeah I've tried and she's said she's really going to try this time to never do it again but how longs that gonna last. But in reality she could have left anytime with some other bloke so I don't know if it's that she really want me or what. This is the hardest thing I've ever had to deal with and I just don't know how to wrap my head around all this, so do I stay and try or just give up ? thanks for the replies seriously

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Yeah I've tried and she's said she's really going to try this time to never do it again but how longs that gonna last. But in reality she could have left anytime with some other bloke so I don't know if it's that she really want me or what. This is the hardest thing I've ever had to deal with and I just don't know how to wrap my head around all this, so do I stay and try or just give up ? thanks for the replies seriously

 

You are an enabler. Of course the behavior won't change.

 

Learn to recognize and ACCEPT people for who they are. You shouldn't have to CHANGE anyone, besides, most people NEVER change.

 

Sorry

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First of all, you need to recognize your own self worth. That is so huge! That is the most important thing. You do that and you will realize that you don't deserve to be treated this way and the decision to walk away and hold your head high will be the easiest decision you have ever made.

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