hopelessincan Posted August 17, 2015 Share Posted August 17, 2015 Anyone here ever relocated later in life? 30's/40's.... I've been seriously considering moving cities...A new start or something like that... If so, what prompted your decision, and was it a difficult choice to make especially if you've got roots where you were... Link to comment
Seraphim Posted August 17, 2015 Share Posted August 17, 2015 I moved at 44. ( I have moved 38 times in my life) Not sure that is " later in life" . I consider later in life to be 70's. It was not an easy decision. Follow my husband and leave my family behind. My husband is military. Every time you pick up and move it's difficult but sometimes it is worth. I guess it depends on why you are moving. Link to comment
Davidator Posted August 17, 2015 Share Posted August 17, 2015 Hi. I'm 36. Have relocated many times and even to different countries. It's hard to take the step, but once you do it you'll see how much you grow and learn. It also gives you the chance to start from zero, you could be a new "you" if you wanted. But it's not for everyone. You have to be very proactive and ASSUME that the first 3 to 7 months are going to Suck (during these initial months you need to work on creating your social network and making your life nice and comfortable in the new place) Good luck, fellow adventurer Edit: once you relocate, you'll also feel younger, I don't know why. Probably because feeling old comes from the lack of new stimulus, something that you'll have plenty of when you move. You'll see this very clearly when after a while you go back and see your old buddies. Seriously, it'll be shocking. And then you'll understand why 30's and 40's is not "later in life" Link to comment
hopelessincan Posted August 17, 2015 Author Share Posted August 17, 2015 Ok..Military makes sense...gives you no choice I guess by later in life I mean when you've got those responsibilities that most 20 somethings wouldn't have... mortgage etc,. I'm considering moving because I feel stagnant. Maybe I'm just running away...maybe I need to find myself... Im just not sure A decade in the same house, same city I've lived my whole life. I'm frankly sick of most of my old friends, (You really do know who your friends are when you are down and out though...that's for sure).... On a positive note, I've been forcing myself out, and have made some great new friends over the last few months....trying to surround myself with positivity... Link to comment
hopelessincan Posted August 17, 2015 Author Share Posted August 17, 2015 Thanks Davidator.... I wouldnt have the guts to move to another country..but considering a smaller town within a few hours from where I currently am.... but its still a big move to be alone anywhere. I'm not too worried about it sucking..it sucks where I am now Not really but I think I just need a change for a while. And I'd still have to find a job first! Link to comment
Hermes Posted August 17, 2015 Share Posted August 17, 2015 Hopeless. Just don't re-locate for the wrong reasons. Don't relocate because the "new place" or new country is going to be a kind of medicine to make you feel better. "Wherever you go, there you are". I went abroad (lived in different places) but at a younger age than you. 30s and 40s is young by today's standards. Perhaps move abroad on a two-year contract only, and see how you get on. Link to comment
hopelessincan Posted August 17, 2015 Author Share Posted August 17, 2015 Hopeless. Just don't re-locate for the wrong reasons. Don't relocate because the "new place" or new country is going to be a kind of medicine to make you feel better. "Wherever you go, there you are". . That right there is what I am not sure of...and I guess need to figure out... Link to comment
Davidator Posted August 17, 2015 Share Posted August 17, 2015 That right there is what I am not sure of...and I guess need to figure out... For the first and last time ever, I will disagree with my good Hermes Sometimes I moved for those reasons... turned out to be the greatest thing I did. Gave me the opportunity to get out of a situation in which I was blocked and start from scratch with the lessons previously learned. Link to comment
Hermes Posted August 17, 2015 Share Posted August 17, 2015 aaah, David, my friend. I know what you mean too. Fields fresh and pastures new...... And to the OP, find that adventurer within you... The world is wide and full of stuff to discover. Life is short. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted August 17, 2015 Share Posted August 17, 2015 I moved 9 miles away from my parents to be in the middle of the city teeming with singles when I was in my late 20s. In my early 40s I followed my husband to a smaller city hundreds of miles from the city I spent my first 40 plus years in -what made it easier in a way was I changed everything - got married. had a baby, was not working outside the home for the first time in decades- all in less than 9 months or so. For us it was essential and worth it although hard to start over. I have worked very hard to make friends/new professional contacts over the last 6 years - I do want to emphasize that you have to be ready to work at that-put in the time in small and large ways, whether it's collecting old shoes for an acquaintance's charity (because you'd like to show your appreciation for her helping you in the past) or regularly following up with people you meet and might want to get to know, etc. Link to comment
LoveSoDeep Posted August 17, 2015 Share Posted August 17, 2015 I just moved to a completely new and crazy place at 37. My parents are in the city I left (along with one of my siblings) but I have other family in other parts of the country. I left for my career. My last job was terrible for me in general - it seemed like no one there wanted to even try to see my potential, which I was sure was there. So I struck out to prove them wrong, and it led me halfway accross the country. At first I wanted to stay close and just find a new job and when it became obvious the opportunity I really wanted was going to be in a another city I just embraced it. I think for me my job was a lot of the reason I felt "in a funk" there, so yes I looked at this move as a fresh start and it has been. It's been good for me in other ways too though. I've been forced to get out and try new things and get out of my comfort zone doing things alone. I may not stay here forever....but I'm really glad I took this step, if I were back at home I think I'd be in the same funk I was 8 months ago. Sometimes a change in scenery rally does do wonders. Link to comment
melancholy123 Posted August 17, 2015 Share Posted August 17, 2015 I grew up in a big city, moved to a small town at 25, moved to my farm at 35. I've been here a long time and can't wait to move. I love the farm but not the area. I look forward to getting out of here asap, tho it could be next spring if we dont sell this farm soon enough. It was a good place to raise two kids, but they are on their own now, and there's no reason to stay here anymore, plus it's worth a small fortune now. It's been a good ride in that it's a farm, we had animals, we have open spaces and great vistas, but the winter is brutal. So we want to be in southern Ontario where winter is milder, and be closer to our kids. It's all in what you make it! Link to comment
hopelessincan Posted August 18, 2015 Author Share Posted August 18, 2015 Thanks everyone for your feedback. Keep it coming. It's nice to feel as though I'm not the only one who feels like they have needed a fresh start.... I just feel that at this age, all the experimenting should be done with....But alas....life doesn't always work out as you had planned or hoped. I sometimes feel I lived my life backwards lol LovesoDeep, I understand the career thing.... For me its the opposite and I have been in my dream job for the last few years and it has kept me going... however, they've been downsizing, and I fear its a matter of time, so if that ends, I really don't have much to hold onto here (and I will probably be somewhat devastated). I am lucky that I have some decent skills and experience that are in demand..I have applied outside of my city and interviewed (and been offered jobs) but one thing I have realized is that I don't want to trade one big city for another... I think I long for peace and quiet and nature lol.....I'll trade you melancholy! I would love to move to a farm...And yes, southern Ontario is nice and hot. An inch of snow is too much for them! Link to comment
Davidator Posted August 18, 2015 Share Posted August 18, 2015 .... I just feel that at this age, all the experimenting should be done with.... I think the moment you start really thinking that, is the moment you start getting old. Honestly. There's nothing bad to start fresh, at any age. We live (since not too long, by the way) in a comfortable society that pampers and immobilizes us, but it is part of our history as species to "relocate", constantly. Go, start a new life with the knowledge you already have. It can ONLY be better, since you have the previous experiences. I guarantee you, that after the first year, you'll feel great and not regret it. You can't regret it because you can always go back, if you feel too bad. Link to comment
Hermes Posted August 18, 2015 Share Posted August 18, 2015 Hopeless. You-d be amazed at the number of people of all ages who relocated, even in their 50s and 60s. It is a good idea to do a little groundwork before you actually set off, maybe visit the area or areas where you think you might like to live. The world's your oyster! Link to comment
Heather Dawn Posted August 18, 2015 Share Posted August 18, 2015 Honestly, I see nothing wrong with it. I've always had a touch of wanderlust and when I was 21 I moved 1500 miles away from home just because (I ultimately moved back to MA, but it was still an important experience). I don't think age has anything to do with it - it's more about circumstance and situation. If you're single and childless/free, and have nothing else that's forcing you to stay, I say go for it! Link to comment
chitown9 Posted August 18, 2015 Share Posted August 18, 2015 I don't know what type of work you do, but the type of work you do may dictate that you will only find that type of work in a big city, which in this case, makes its very difficult if not impossible to not move to another big city. However, another possibility is to move to a big city that is near wildlife and outdoor activities. In this way, you have the best of both worlds. Link to comment
hopelessincan Posted August 19, 2015 Author Share Posted August 19, 2015 I can find work in smaller towns with what I do, but they are few and far between.... My city is close to wildlife and all that... but I want it at my doorstep. Coincidentally enough.. I got a call today to interview somewhere that's on my list....So maybe its a sign! Link to comment
Seraphim Posted August 19, 2015 Share Posted August 19, 2015 An inch of snow is not too much for us in Southern Ont. Link to comment
hopelessincan Posted August 19, 2015 Author Share Posted August 19, 2015 An inch of snow is not too much for us in Southern Ont. LOL. ok two inches? lol ... I have family and friends there... and that's what I hear! been there a few times and I love the humidity. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted August 19, 2015 Share Posted August 19, 2015 LOL. ok two inches? lol ... I have family there... and that's what I hear! been there a few times and I love the humidity. We have had two miserable winters back to back. I think we had 7 foot drifts. So slightly more than 2 inches. Lol. Ugh! I hate humidity with a PASSION. Has been almost 40 C with humidity for a few days now . I despise it. I used to live in the GTA, but now I am more Eastern Ont. Link to comment
hopelessincan Posted August 19, 2015 Author Share Posted August 19, 2015 well....at least southern ont doesn't call in the army for a wee bit of snow........ 7 feet of snow...meh..thats nothing! lol Link to comment
Seraphim Posted August 19, 2015 Share Posted August 19, 2015 well....at least southern ont doesn't call in the army for a wee bit of snow........ 7 feet of snow...meh..thats nothing! lol Hehehehe ... Yeah, that was bad. ( I lived not in Toronto but more outlying) Still the last 2 winters really sucked huge for most of the country. Link to comment
hopelessincan Posted August 19, 2015 Author Share Posted August 19, 2015 lol well then I wont hold it against you and yes the last couple winters have sucked! But hey...that's winter... just have to find something enjoyable to do to make it through! Link to comment
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