Help, I don't know if I should leave the girl I love

[localvet]

Here it is. She is Russian, lives with mom, sister and brother, shares a bed with 26 year old sister. She is 27. I am about 10 years older, established, own home good job etc..

She says she has never felt so happy and been with someone who cares so much and etc..., all great stuff. Here is the rub...she is not allowed to date non Russians outside her church. So she is hiding me. Leaves for home at 8:30 every night, and her mom and brother start calling if she is late. We can not go out like normal couples, and she can not spend the night like normal. We can not even go downtown holding hands and have a drink, as someone might see us. I also can not post a picture of us on facebook because someone might see and tell her family and they will go nuts. I have been patient for 5 months. I told her she can move in with me and get away from that oppressive life, and that I want a normal relationship. She has been over to be with me and my girls on my kid days almost every single night, but at 8:00 the goodbyes begin. Her response is that no matter what it isnt enough for me. I see her giving me a lot of time, but it is all time in my house or an occasional out of town day trip. I want a normal relationship, but ...

She is my perfect 10, except for this crazy family thing. So I am scarred to end it, but I am not getting what I need or want 100%. I want to be seen as a couple, I want to go see live shows together, I want sleep overs and etc... I asked her if she wants the same and her response is "eventually". Do I continue longer, or is 5 months long enough? BTW, no there is not anyone else in the picture, I am sure of it.

[mhowe]

That is a big "but". And you can't change it, so I would end it.

 

Any relationship that has to be hidden cannot survive.

 

If this is the same girl that has been texting her ex....and you were out to lunch with her when her ex walked in...I am confused.

[localvet]

That is a big "but". And you can't change it, so I would end it.

 

Any relationship that has to be hidden cannot survive.

 

If this is the same girl that has been texting her ex....and you were out to lunch with her when her ex walked in...I am confused.

 

Yes it is.

[SpottiOtti]

What are her future plans for handling this situation? At some point, if she is serious about being with you she is going to have to come clean to her family. If she doesn't have a plan or a timetable for that . . . I mean, you can't live in fantasyland forever.