caramellabacix Posted January 12, 2005 Share Posted January 12, 2005 Guys: How much do looks *really* mean to you? If a girl is average looking, but has confidence and a sense of humor, would you date her? Is confidence more important to you than looks? My friend is getting really depressed lately because she doesn't think she's attractive to guys. When she comes to me, I really don't know what to say to her. She's pretty average looking, kind of short, and she has no confidence whatsoever. How much could she improve her chances of becoming attractive to a guy by increasing her confidence level? I know that for me, I much rather go for the average-looking guy who's comfortable with himself regardless of how attractive he thinks he is. To me, if a guy has a good personality and is confident in himself, even if he is "ugly" he can become attractive in my eyes. Is it the same for guys, or are looks really the most important factor? Link to comment
Strictly4MyGrind Posted January 12, 2005 Share Posted January 12, 2005 Well for some people look are important other not....me im in the middlle but yeh if someone is confident good sense of humour genreally good person and good personality then it wil make them more attractive to someone....... Link to comment
DragonGirl724 Posted January 12, 2005 Share Posted January 12, 2005 Well for some people look are important other not....me im in the middlle but yeh if someone is confident good sense of humour genreally good person and good personality then it wil make them more attractive to someone....... hehehe good answer & thats coming from a guy called strictly4mygroind -DG724 Link to comment
DragonGirl724 Posted January 12, 2005 Share Posted January 12, 2005 oops!!! GRIND! haha nvm -DG724 Link to comment
Ecko809 Posted January 12, 2005 Share Posted January 12, 2005 confidence is VERY attractive Link to comment
jerryriceisking Posted January 12, 2005 Share Posted January 12, 2005 I usually like girls that have a pretty face. The body usually doesn't matter to me that much. that's just me. Link to comment
Strictly4MyGrind Posted January 12, 2005 Share Posted January 12, 2005 oops!!! GRIND! haha nvm -DG724 Hmm Groind And Grind i can see where you umm made the mistake.....i think....... ?? sense of humour i like that....... Link to comment
sephoraX Posted January 12, 2005 Share Posted January 12, 2005 another question to add to the pot--- guys, can you overlook a girls flaws (weight mostly) when they are confident? and i have noticed lately that i love people for their flaws. i feel kinda weird for it but i wish more people would see it the way i do. my boyfriend is no where near the type that would be voted "most attractive" but for his flaws he is sooo perfect in my eyes. also, most girls have cute bubbly handwriting. my friend (female-the sweetest and most gorgeous person i know) and downright ugly handwriting...and for some reason i love her for it. i know these are odd points to point out--but i was curious if anyone else noticed and like flaws the way i do? Link to comment
caramellabacix Posted January 12, 2005 Author Share Posted January 12, 2005 another question to add to the pot--- guys, can you overlook a girls flaws (weight mostly) when they are confident? that's actually a question i was trying to ask, i just couldn't word it right, thanks lol Link to comment
DragonGirl724 Posted January 12, 2005 Share Posted January 12, 2005 oops!!! GRIND! haha nvm -DG724 Hmm Groind And Grind i can see where you umm made the mistake.....i think....... ?? sense of humour i like that....... oh la la eNotalone dating service. lol -DG724 Link to comment
ShySoul Posted January 12, 2005 Share Posted January 12, 2005 Looks don't matter, it's who the person is inside that counts. I don't pay attention to appearance, I care about substance. If she is confident, has a sense of humor, and we get along well, then of course I would date her. Basically, confidence is key. If someone believes in themselves then they will appear friendlier and people will notice her more. Those who just go after looks are superficial and not worth a second thought. I've said it before and I'll say it again, what exactly is "attractive" anyways? Not everyone finds the same things physically attractive. What one person considers "hot" another person may find completely unappealing. What one person considers average, another person may find stunning. Looks are so subjective it's best to not be too concerned with it. Focus on being who you who are and believing in yourself. Once you get to know a person and see that you like there personality, you will begin to find them physically attractive, regardless of what others may think. So yes, confidence and personality are what really matters. As for our flaws, they are a part of us and makes us who we are. No one is perfect and sometimes our minor imperfections can make us stand out. Sometimes a flaw could be considered cute and make a person more attractive, as long as its not something major that could hurt someone emotionally or physically. Otherwise, what's wrong with it? Is a persons weight really a flaw, or is it just part of who they are, part of the total package? Link to comment
caramellabacix Posted January 12, 2005 Author Share Posted January 12, 2005 that is officially my favorite answer on enotalone.com Link to comment
drahcir Posted January 12, 2005 Share Posted January 12, 2005 Looks really don't matter too much to me, but every one is different. For some people they do matter, while for others its not too important. Confidence is important, but being too confident can actually scare guys away. ITs true. Link to comment
69_king Posted January 12, 2005 Share Posted January 12, 2005 I think there needs to be some physical attraction. But an average or below average looking person who is nice, confident, friendly, smiling etc. and tries to make the best of themselves will begin to look very attractive once you start seeing them more often. So, you don't need to be born a beauty to be physically attractive. If someone makes me smile when I see them then that is physical attraction and that can be achieved by the things I mentioned above. If she's looking for a quick fix, tell her to try making her hair really nice and cute. Maybe thats just a personal thing, but to me hair can have a huge impact on a persons looks. (I know if I comb my hair one way I look like a complete dork but if I comb it another way I look very handsome) Link to comment
Doctor Smurf Posted January 13, 2005 Share Posted January 13, 2005 Well girls... I think looks are kind of Important. I wouldnt go out with a girl if she was really ugly but I dont see many people I would put in that category! as for weight - I have never gone on a date with an overweigth girl. If she was a really nice person who said that she would do something about it (and I believed her) then I DEFINATLY go with her. Any time.... I can overlook it if the personality is nice enough. Dan Link to comment
MetalJoe Posted January 13, 2005 Share Posted January 13, 2005 If a girl is average looking, but has confidence and a sense of humor, would you date her? A sense of humour is very important to me, much more than confidence. I've been attracted to women with low and high confidence and don't really find it an issue, but they've all had a good sense of humour. So yes, in answer to your question, I would. Link to comment
Kyoshiro Ogari Posted January 13, 2005 Share Posted January 13, 2005 What do you consider average looking? People have different tastes. And if boys don't like you because of the way you look, who needs those losers anyway? image removed Link to comment
Ceema-k Posted January 13, 2005 Share Posted January 13, 2005 Let's not mince words... looks DO matter. Always have and probably always will. That said, your friend's low confidence and negative perception of herself is probably hurting her more than anything. Your looks are pretty hard to change, but as the plethora of reality & makeover TV shows have demonstrated, your looks can drastically improve if you dress a little better & learn better grooming techniques. And sure, you can put yourself under the knife and go extreme on the makeover, but why? Working on one's confidence and self-esteem is much more beneficial and longer-lasting. I see "average" couples on the streets every day. In fact, the large majority of people who procreate would probably be considered "average"-looking. Guess what? The "average" IS the majority! Let's face it, your friend won't be locking lips with a Brad Pitt anytime soon. But if she has reasonable standards and expectations & can boost up her confidence and learn to like herself , more boys will start taking notice! Link to comment
ShySoul Posted January 13, 2005 Share Posted January 13, 2005 What do you consider average looking? People have different tastes. And if boys don't like you because of the way you look, who needs those losers anyway? My thoughts exactly. Can anyone really give me a definition of what average looking is? Of what hot is? Ugly? Physical beauty is in the eye of the beholder. But true beauty doesn't change - a good heart, a sincere personality, and confidence in yourself. And any boy who doesn't like you because of your looks are losers who aren't worth a second thought. Link to comment
asdf Posted January 13, 2005 Share Posted January 13, 2005 for me, looks do matter. i mean, you have to be physically attracted right? it's not like a conscious decision, it just happens. i don't know, i think looks matter to me, but there have been a few girls i liked that weren't the best looking, but the way they carried themselves attracted me (they kept fit, took care of their image, didn't look unhealthy or lazy or anything.) Link to comment
revdeluka Posted January 14, 2005 Share Posted January 14, 2005 caramellabacix, youve posted a very interesting post. well these are my thoughts. yes looks attract guys and even scares them away sometimes. but the truth is most people settle for personality over looks. and those who go for just looks want to have a good time and bye bye. and as for your friend i can bet my life on it that there are boys who admire her on a daily basis. a little smile here and there ougth to do the trick Link to comment
SuperBoy Posted January 14, 2005 Share Posted January 14, 2005 Physical attraction for most guys happens when they see a girl that they consider to be beautiful. Personally, I am not immediately attracted to a girl who looks plain and/or is overweight. BUT, that's just the first stage. If that hot girl is dumb, or rude, or just doesn't click with the guy, then the guy's interest quickly fades. On the flip side, girls with average looks can become VERY attractive to a guy once they get to know each other. Many times the way I think about a girl completely changes after we become friends. And her physical appearance, which doesn't actually change, becomes beautiful to me (or more so if I already thought she looked good). So please tell your friend that she has hope. I'm sure she has some incredible qualities about her, and when the right guy comes along, he will love her for them. Link to comment
themysteriousone Posted January 19, 2005 Share Posted January 19, 2005 the girl im in love with, has a great personality. she's fun, doesnt care what anyone else thinks and has alot of confidence. i admit that i think(and i dont mean this in the way it might sound but) shes not very attractive. but for me knowing that i think that helps me see that why im in love with her isnt based on looks. Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now