WHY do Guys Need Girlfriends????

[LuciaSeia]

Help!!! This guy I am dating told me today that girls and guys needs relationships for different reasons. I asked him why do guys need them???? He said "Uh, I don't know..because they are horny"..meaning they need girlfriends for sex? This is coming from a 23 year old too, not a 17 year old. Is this true?? I know not all guys are perverts, but even the nice guys..is a main reason someone to have sex with?

 

I know this guy has had only 2 girlfriends, and one sexual partner in his life too. I don't know what to make of this..

 

should I back off someone who can be so blunt and say something like that? I can't go into a relationship knowing he just wants me for sex.

[Day_Walker]

Guys have gfs for companionship. Its just the nature of people to not want to be alone so they look for a "partner". Now an integral part of a relationship is sex. So while his answer was correct it wasnt worded properly and you found it offensive. The bottom line is that sex is important to guys and some people (men and women) will have relationships so they can have plenty of sex.

[SkyFire]

Guys have gfs for companionship. Its just the nature of people to not want to be alone so they look for a "partner".

 

Wrong. I do not give into this "dying alone" stuff. I will never in my life place my happiness on another person.

 

I do not NEED a GF. Girls add spice to life, yes. But as far as what I look for.. I would have to say she has to be faithful, and fun. I cant stand boring people.

 

That is all.

 

 

 

As to the original poster..

 

Yes, we like sex. So do you. We are perverts, and so are you.

[Mr. B]

I think companionship is definitely the primary motivation, it is for me (a bona fide 'nice guy'), although I'm sure there are plenty of sex-addicted men around. As for the guy you're dating, he's probably just not the sharpest knife in the drawer. I doubt he ment much by it, probably just failed to make a point.

[Beec]

I think that when one needs a relationship, there may be a real problem. Companionship and sex are two of the things that tmoviate guys to have relationships. One of the other things is that we are programmed to try to ensure that our woman has our children and not someone else's. But the real answer is that we all have emotional needs, and when someone fullfils our needs, we want to keep them around. So, it is more about what we need and want emotionally and how those needs and wants are met. If the guy only needs someplace to deposit his semen, he does not need much at all and seems pretty shallow.

[MetalJoe]

Yup, companionship for me. Someone to eventually share my life with and start a family.

[OceanEyes]

Hey LuciaSeia,

 

I doubt that a guy would stick around in a relationship JUST for the sex. That may be a major reason (hey, it is for me too!), but if he's not into your personality and your general disposition in life, then there's no way that sex alone will keep him around.

 

I have no problem that a guy would have sex high on his list of needs/ priorities in a relationship. I just asked my boyfriend to give me a 1-3 list of what he finds most important in a relationship, and sex was #2. But, he also stated that it wasn't just sex, but the physical closeness, affection, intimacy, etc.

[ShySoul]

People want a relationship for companionship and understanding. None of us wants to feel alone in our lives. So we search for someone who can make us feel complete, someone who cares about us and understands us. We want someone to share in our triumphs and cheer us up when we are down. We want someone with whom we share an emotional and spiritual bond. We want someone we can love. Sex comes into play because it is a declaration of that love, a bonding of two people on a physical, emotional, and hopefully spiritual level. Sex should be a product of the love and relationship, not the primary reason for a relationship. There are people, both guys and girls who are looking for sex. But they won't have a fulfilling relationship. Those who focus on the emotions involved are better off and on the right track.

[DivineNess]

maybe i'm wrong here but i thought most people would want a relationship with someone because they have feelings for that person. if its about this so called companionship that means most of you would go out with anyone just to have someone.

[Outlaw2747]

Yeah, that guy definitely wasn't exactly the most morally correct person but at least he was honest about it. In any case, most guys look for a relationship just to have a sense of comfort and a little bit of a spice in their life as one poster adequately put it. Affection and companionship from the opposite sex can be such a promising thing when all works out well. When it comes to sex and having children, we want to start our own family NOT to spread our genes to as many females as possible like most animals. I look for a relationship to have a sense of well being, to feel wanted and loved and for the affection. The sex is more of a reward than a "mission objective". Girls are not sex objects. So if a guy ever comes up to you and says the only reason why a guy comes to a girl is JUST for sex, he might be talking more about HIMSELF than for the rest of us. And believe me, I don't need anyone to speak for me, I have my own voice.

[ShySoul]

DivineNess,

 

It's companionship with someone we have feelings for. The desire for companionship is what drives us to seek out a relationship, but its the connection with and feelings for someone that is the reason we choose one person and not someone else. Your right, you shouldn't go out with someone just to have someone. That's not right and not fair to the other person. It also won't lead to a lasting relationship.

[RayKay]

maybe i'm wrong here but i thought most people would want a relationship with someone because they have feelings for that person. if its about this so called companionship that means most of you would go out with anyone just to have someone.

 

Well, the person you have a companionship/partnership with is also a person you have feelings for. But long term commitment is about more than having feelings, as it does involve partnership and companionship...sometimes feelings are not always going to be as strong as they were at other times so a person needs to be committed to the person through that as well and to renewing the feelings. Long term relationships require shared values, expectations, communication - that is where companionship comes in. Feelings are what sparks the bond and keeps it present.

 

No one said that you choose someone just to have someone.

[DragonGirl724]

interesting topic...

 

i dont think you will get a straight answer ever. i feel that age & past experiences help in the decision process of what we choose to want & dont want. if a guy had a steady longterm GF for 10 yrs & now wants a GF he may just want a flooze, someone not so serious etc...if a guy always had floozies he may want a GF for REAL companionship. ya feel?

 

i can honestly say that THE MAJORITY of why people in general want a BF/GF is for companionship, goodtimes, manogomous sex, & someone they can really be themselves with, & even cry to.

 

maybe that helps answer tour question..

 

-DG724

[xbox_modding_freak]

No guy NEEDS girls. If they think girls are just for sex etc etc then i think they are a very selfish person.

 

-XmF

[7CardStud]

we don't NEED girlfriends.... think about it though, if we are all having girlfriends that means all girls NEED boyfriends..... same amoun of guys and girls pretty much ^_^

 

So don't make it look like guys are very clingy to g/f's when there is obviously a equal amount of g/f's with b/f's

[shuntaro603]

Guys have gfs for companionship. Its just the nature of people to not want to be alone so they look for a "partner".

 

That's how I feel right now. I want a gf so when she has a problem I can be there for her, and when I have a problem she is there for me. I want an emotional relationship. Some guys called me weird but I don't care, this is how I feel. lol

 

 

[drahcir]

People have different motivations for finding a partner because they are raised differently and are in different cultures. In some cultures (ie. many North American cultures) sex is a (not the only) primary motive. In some cultures, economic gain or sustenance is more important. Even within cultures people have different motives. Some people just want a girlfriend or boyfriend because all thier friends have them, and they want to be like their friends. Other people are lonely. Some people want a relationship because their parents are abusive or detached, and they are looking for someone who will love them. There are as many motives for a relationshp as there are people.