Successful Bipolar relationships?

[blacklantana]

Hi. Not sure what section to put this in, but assumed relationship conflicts would be semi-appropriate.

 

Simple question. Has anyone here, whether it is you or someone you know, been bipolar or has had a partner that is bipolar, and had a successful relationship? If so, what did you do to make it work? Did you go to couple counseling? Read books (If any, please recommend some)? Do research? (also post your recommendations)

 

If it did not work, please explain why and what could have made it work, or at least a better chance of working.

 

Thank you.

[pippy longstocking]

I find these threads quite difficult

 

there are two types of bipolar , there is bipolar 1 and bipolar 11 ...

 

both are different obviously and it is bipolar 1 that is the most severe .

 

with bipolar 11 you are more likely to rapid cycle where as the moods of bp 1 can last for months

 

my phone is ringing I will write more later

[mbee]

I have a couple of friends who have a successful relationship with someone who has a severe case of bipolar (hospitalization, suicide attempts, etc.). Both are in therapy because being with someone who has bipolar to that extreme is very difficult for most people. The relationship is described as an emotional rollercoaster and everything feels unstable. Both partners have to be invested in making sure the partner with bipolar continually goes to therapy, consistently takes their meds, charts moods, etc. It's a lot of work and commitment.

 

I know of many failed relationships. Sometimes it ends for "normal" reasons, other times because the non-bipolar partner cannot understandably handle the extreme behaviors caused by the moods...

[Unreasonable]

Not all bipolar cases are as severe as others. In many cases a person can be completely, 100% functional with the right cocktail of medications, and not even require continuous therapy. I know this for a fact.

 

In the 1950's mental institutions were cleared out en mass with the discovery of mood stabilzing properties lithium. Today's drugs are even better.

 

I know couples that have been together for decades when one person had bipolar disorder.

 

So, number one, make sure they are on their meds, and that adjustments are made if they are not working well enough. Some people have very severe cases, though, so this may not be enough, in which case yes, couples therapy can be quite useful.

[nutbrownhare]

I have a friend who's been happily in a seven year relationship with a guy who's bipolar - he is a successful architect and his illness is controlled effectively with medication - which he takes religiously. He's in his fifties and has had two hospital admissions in his life, both before they met.

 

I used to work in mental health myself; as part of awareness-raising days, we used to invite this lovely lady who described her experiences of bipolar. She'd been married for thirty years; she was very self-aware, very careful about taking her meds and also about not taking on more responsibility than she could handle at any one time. She had run a successful PR company for years, too.

[shellyf62]

My Son is bipolar and is divorced. His Ex decided she couldn't handle his mood swings. They have a child & it is very hard for him only seeing his Son on weekends.

He met a lovely girl online & she moved from America to Australia to be with him. She has never dealt with Bipolar before, so it is a big learning curve for her.

They both live with me. I think it is good for them, as I can help her deal with his issues.

He is functioning, has a job, takes very good care of his Son, but does sometimes not take his meds, as it might be off pay week etc.

We can always tell when he is off them, he is very "short" and can be really nasty. But once back on them all is ok.

I have had to teach his GF not to take things personally. If he is in a bad mood it is just him. Nothing she did caused it. Also if he needs time out alone just let him be. Don't annoy him, don't ask if he is ok, just let him hibernate for a while til he feels better.

She seems to be coping with it all, and they do love each other.