girl765 Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 I was with my ex for several years and broke up 4 years ago. I was really close to his mom but never contacted her for years because I thought it was weird and needed to get over the relationship. Well she joined facebook a few months ago so I msg'd her and we've been talking ever since and have met up for coffees too. When I tell people they're like omg...does your fiance know?? Of course he knows but if it bothered him he wouldn't tell me because he's overly nice. I keep hearing negative things about this relationship as if it's going to cause problems. What do you think? Would he be upset because I'm not close to his mom? I don't really see the problem. The only negative thing he said was that he wants nothing to do with this woman. Obviously I don't expect him to meet her. Link to comment
mhowe Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 Why on earth would you, as an engaged woman, reestablish contact after YEARS with your ex's mom? You found her...she did not come looking for you. If I were your fiancé.... this would be huge red flag that you want your wx to know what is going on with you. Link to comment
girl765 Posted January 18, 2014 Author Share Posted January 18, 2014 Why does this have to be about my ex? He lives accross the country married with kids. I contacted her because it was less intimidating to send her a quick msg online rather than potentially being rejected over the phone. Link to comment
Doc Blaze Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 IMo i think it would be best to establish friendships elsewhere ... Link to comment
mhowe Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 Why does this have to be about my ex? He lives accross the country married with kids. I contacted her because it was less intimidating to send her a quick msg online rather than potentially being rejected over the phone. Because there was no need to contact her. You haven't spoken in YEARS. Link to comment
Selflove1 Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 My sister was with her childhood sweetheart for 6 years, she basically lived at there house! they had a messy break up and she didn't see the family for a couple of years. But she has always kept in touch with his parents, even though he has moved out with his new girlfriend. She'll pop in ever so often and see how his mum is, he may not be comfortable with it but he has said he understands as long as it's not when him and his girlfriend are there. Which my sister obviously knows and would never do that. I don't find it weird, but I think you do need to say to fiancé that it has nothing to do with your ex it's just that you see his mum as a friend. If it does become a problem your fiance is more important than an exs mum Link to comment
shellyf62 Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 I would find it very odd if someone I was dating was still in contact with their Exs family, unless there are children involved. What do you guys have in common? Do you talk about your new life & your Fiancé ? Personally if my Son broke up with someone I wouldn't be their friend, I would find it disrespectful To my Son, and I am positive he wouldn't want me telling her his business. Link to comment
jjkk Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 While I do think it's a bit odd to rekindle w/ an ex's mom after so many years, I don't understand the issue. You say you two were close and I think it's great to have lots of friends. I would cut ties if you discover it does bother your fiancé though, it's not worth jeopardizing your relationship with him. Link to comment
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