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AnotherBrokenDoll

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Officially finished my work days - 5 days off!!! Very happy. Also was chatting to a wonderfully lovely lady today. She is a beginner rider. Another one of my instructors student, and she bought one of my instructors horses. Well i was saying i really want to compete in August, and she just offered me her horse!!! She was seriously lovely. And said i should feel free to come out and ride him whenever i wanted too. And that for the competition she will be away for three weeks anyway so if i want to ride him and keep him fit for her she said that was fine. She also complimented me on my riding and was saying that she wanted someone a bit moe experienced to ride him anyway so he doesn't pick up bad habits.I explained i'm definitely not experienced but she didn't seem to mind

 

It probably won't happen. Firstly she's on my instructors property and i need my instructor to be there whilst i ride. And i would feel like an inconvenience being there. But you never know, i may have a horse to take to a show!!!!!

 

As for buying, probably looking at the cheaper option and buying a horse straight off the track that is at the dogger. Then getting my instructor to train them up for a month. Still less than half the price of the other horse. Just definitely won't be competing any time soon, because it will need a lot of training. A lot. And will need to learn to jump from scratch. But hey, once it starts jumping - it will have been taught properly, from my instructor. Now just gotta hope i get an awesome tax to pay for horse and operation.

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So read my previous post and realized I sounded like a snooty horse person 'but I only want the best horse, not some dogger'.

 

That is the furtherest from what I've meant. To save a horse. To know it will not be dog food because of me - well that would be amazing. I know that most people say that they have the most amazing bonds with their rescues because their rescues are just so grateful. That is everything to me. The bond. The love. The trust. That is by far more important than jumping ability, because if you have that trust you can teach the jumping.

 

My attitude is more towards my own level. Dogger horses are unpredictable. You don't really know what you are getting. You don't know about previous injuries. About what the horse spooks at. And mostly - the horse I will be saving will most likely be an off the track horse. And you have to retrain that horse.

 

Now of course I would be getting professional training for a month. Make sure everything will be safe. It's not the hard work that worries me. I don't mind putting the work in. It's the questioning of whether I am a good enough rider to continue with that horses training.

 

But if that is my only choice - i guess the benefit to this is that I will learn so much. And if I am successful I am going to come out of that a far better rider, and I would be far more confident in my ability. Just have to get the money and realize that I can do this!

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It's all about generating that bond. There needs to be the mutual trust between you and the horse, and if the horse trusts you, you can most likely trust it. So whichever route you go, I'm sure you'll be able to achieve this. You have a really kind heart and horses... they can just kind of feel that. It's also important to be confident, because if you're scared, the horse will know that too. I'm sure you're a better rider than you give yourself credit for.

 

This sounds pretty exciting though. Good luck and stay safe!

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LikeWater, thank you. I hope it goes well. I'm probably 3 - 4 weeks off buying. Then the horse will spend another 4 weeks at my instructors getting retrained. But I'll still get to visit.

 

That is if everything goes well. If not, then I'll wait until next year.

 

I'm getting better at the whole confident thing. I used to get on and either be terrified that I would fall or scared I couldn't control the horse or just be so anxious and frustrated from work and the horses always picked up on it.

 

The moment I left my previous job and started simply just being confident my riding improved so much. Now instead of being afraid I get on top of them straight away. Make sure they know to listen to me. Still a long way off being an experienced rider though.

 

My instructor and my friend are truly amazing. My friend has a horse pretty much broken in after only once sitting on her and one ride. The horse was listening to leg aids and everything. It was pretty bloody amazing. And she gets on her off the track horses that are literally straight off the track with just a halter. And takes them up the gallop hill. Cannot wait until I have the balance and experience to just be able to sit to everything.

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It's so hard. These nights I spend at my grandfather's. I'm always left to my own devices and all I can do is sit here and think about how lonely I am.

 

It's ridiculous. I've been out all day. Stopped and chatted to my sister. Had a lovely call from my amazing boyfriend. But here I am. Lonely.

 

My boyfriend went out tonight with a friend of his and his girlfriend. She is a really nice girl and she apparently said I should go over one day. She is so kind, always includes me in Facebook pics that are about people she is thinking of. I've only met this girl probably 5 times. But she is just one of those genuinely nice people and I know she would make a great friend. I just never know what to say to new people. So I avoid the awkwardness of perhaps having awkward silences that are simply not filled.

 

I spent literally 8 months of weekends and school holidays at the paddock before actually really being able to call the girls I ride with friends.

 

I honestly just suck when it comes to people Seeing a friend in a few days. But our catch ups are never the same anymore. We reminisce about the past great times we've had, but mainly spend time whinging about work or the boys. Don't get me wrong I love seeing her and sometimes it's nice to have that person I can let loose too. But we never have 'fun' now.

 

I don't know what is happening to me.

 

Also can't stop thinking about the fact that one of the girls I was friends with in school had a Facebook status and had tagged some people in it. Turns out she's now friends with a relative of mine. Not that she knows this. It's a relative on my dad's side. I messaged her so I could ask her about him. But I chickened out. I don't know if it's a brother or a cousin or what. But I just want to know so badly what he is like.

 

I don't know what I should do anymore.

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Can not even describe the heart ache I am right now. Finally had everything a go. Had the funds. Bought the saddle. Am looking at the horse on Saturday. But now I have no where to put it. I truly thought that was the one thing I didn't have to worry about. I was wrong. I do not understand what I did. A week ago when we spoke about it everything was fine. Today.. it wasn't. I'm literally shattered. I understand they made some genuine points. But what hurt me was that it didn't feel right for them. I would never have had said anything negative. Ever. I trusted their opinions. I'm not even making sense. I'm off to bed. I need to sleep. Work tomorrow.

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Looking at the horse tomorrow. Still looking for agistment. But my amazing instructor has come to the rescue and said she will hold onto him for me until I can find him a home. Will be interesting to see how he goes. Hopefully he is calm and quiet. We will soon find out! Haha. I feel so incredibly awkward at home. Literally. Being here is killing me. But hopefully in a month or so this will all have blown over.

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I may now officially own my own horse. Pretty excited! Love that the first pet I ever buy myself is the biggest you can get! He is amazingly gorgeous. And not even just saying that cuz he is mine - but because he is truly a big beautiful giant. I cannot believe he is mine. I pick him up tomorrow

 

So basically I got there and saw him straight away and loved him. Truth be told I loved him the moment the add went up but just thought someone would snatch him up. But no one did. If I hadn't bought him today, he wouldn't be alive

 

So anyway, I saw him and loved him. Then she separated him from the others. And I got to go meet him. The lady was there (she was truly wonderful and helpful). Anyway she approached him and he trotted off head in the air. Didn't take a minute for him to calm down and let her get him. Then I went over. I patted him and cuddled him and laid on him. I picked up all his feet. Stretched his legs. Lunged him. Put the saddle on him (but couldn't ride because my girth didn't fit him). He was an angel. I let him go. And he stayed there beside me. Just stood there with me. Let me pat and cuddle him. Use him as an arm rest. Everything and didn't leave. Then I had to leave to get money out. When I came back he was standing there at the gate just looking at me so I went straight in. He didn't run away. Just let me catch him straight away.

 

Haha the lady even said 'he doesn't do that for me!'. Just can't describe how much I love him. How I think everything could have been wrong with him and I still would have had to get him out because he was just such a nice boy - i couldn't leave him there.

 

He needs a few things looked at. But that's okay. I can fix him up and love him always.

 

Can't wait to see my instructor ride him! Will be truly amazing to watch his first ride. I hope he is good. I know that he won't know anything. But as long as he is willing and kind. That's all that matters. Can't wait til the first time I can hop on!! So so excited to ride my very own boy

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That was the only photo it would let me upload. I am crappy with computers. But he is a stunning chestnut with a beautiful blaze all the way down his nose. He is my stunning boy.

 

Cannot believe how well behaved and calm and quiet he is. Today i was sitting in his yard with his food bucket in my lap and he was eating it, and putting his nose in my face and just being so friendly. When i was cleaning his yard of sticks he would just follow me around. He walked straight onto a float behind me. Didn't even think about it. Stood still the entire time. Was easy to get off. Didn't even get silly when he got to his new home and could see all the other horses. Just wanted to sniff things.

 

You know how i know i managed to blindly bring home a good horse? When my instructor says she is very jealous and wanted him haha. Apparently he has very good bloodlines for jumping. Should be a natural She did say that might also mean he will be stronger and more forward moving but she is confident we can work him out of that if that is the case

 

Fingers crossed i might have a horse that can learn with me and together we could learn to be amazing

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Also thanks to avman and zentoCC for the kind words.

 

Trying to find more information if the hard part. He is an ex racer. Had a ligament injury but healed. Last race was 2012. And that's basically all we know. Looks like someone bought him and sold him and he ended up at the doggers. What we need to find out is why he ended up there. He is apparently quiet to ride. I can't see him being too nuts. But that being said at my old paddock, my favourite horse on the ground there would be no way I could control under saddle cuz she was a nut. But on the ground she's the quietest sweetest thing.. so as long as he isn't like that we should be okay. But I think he will be fine. He rode quiet and the lady who sold him to me wouldn't have let me buy him if she thought I wouldn't be safe.

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Velvet now has incredibly expensive shoes on his feet. Seriously. So expensive! Like 5 x the price of my usual shoes. And they need to get done every 6 - 8 weeks. Oh my god it's going to kill me. But, if it makes my horse sound, than that is what matters. Fingers crossed he will be just fine with these specific shoes!

 

He was all excited today. Racing around like a loon. Hope he calms down. I'm sure he will. He just probably has never felt so good for a very long time. So now, he will be all happy and excited and want to work. Can't wait to see some wonderful results

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And then the next day he was slope again.. like really Velvet Just hoping it's foot soreness from having loose shoes, then having them removed, then being shod again, then kicking them off, then being shoes again with shoes he has never had before. So not only would his feet be tender from nails going in and out of his feet, but also he has to get used to the angle of these shoes. Just hoping it helps him.

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Velvet was limping so badly today. Trying not to move at all. My poor baby. The worst part is, we need to see if it's getting better so I can't give him pain relief. Have to wait a week. If he is still this sore then there is something going on. Then I'll have to get the vet out.

 

Watching him today legit broke my heart. I hate being useless. I hate that he is in pain because stupid me thought it would be a good idea to see if he would be okay barefoot. Just have to hope that is just his foot giving him grief and not his past injury. Love that horse to pieces.

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Only in the horse world is an abscess exploding out of the top of your foot what you are hopeful for!

 

Took his bell boots off today and found puss all over them and the farrier thinks it could have been an abscess that exploded. If it is that's actually really good! Means he should start to feel better within 24 hours. However if he is still sore by the end of the week I need to call the vet.

 

Fingers crossed, he will recover quickly now! And feel better tomorrow. I really hope so. We did finally find out his tender spot though and it was the slit where puss was draining so that's good! At least it doesn't seem to be the ligaments at all.

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Bloody hell. I knew owning a horse would be hard work and money, but this is just crazy! So now Velvet is recovering nicely from the abcess. Would have been able to be ridden today if he didn't freaking throw his shoe!! Like seriously horse. Seriously. Getting the farrier back tomorrow. This will be the fourth farrier to see him in the 3 weeks his owned him and this will be the 4th shoe that's been put on that foot since I got him.

 

Goodbye more money. All up I think his feet alone have cost me close to $350. That was supposed to be feet and chiro money!! Not even remotely cool. He will have to wait for chiro now cuz I am officially broke. And seriously for that much normally I probably could have had his teeth done too! But no, throwing shoes is far more fun.

 

Did I tell you he managed to do this in the round yard. You know, filled with soft sand. Also that I have no idea where he put the shoe. I have used rakes, three of us have tried looking for it, I even got down and dirty and dug through the sand. It would have been cheaper if I at least had the bloody shoe. But no of course not! Grrr.

 

On the plus side I love him dearly. He lights up my world and makes me very happy.

 

Also had an awesome lesson today. Going to take me a long time to get used to teaching the horse things. Cuz I know nothing myself really. But I have fun and enjoy what I'm doing. So that is all that matters

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