just walked the NC tightrope luckily I didn't fall off. . .

[TalkThatTalk9]

so, the ex and I have been broken up for a year and six months. . . . been NC for a year and 3 months. he left me for someone.

we were together almost 7 years.

 

I have a new boyfriend, we have been together 8 months, who worships me and treats me like gold would do anything for me. we get along great. complete opposite of what I had with my ex.

 

I feel like a bad person because my ex creeps into my head about once a day. some days it is barely a thought, other days he literally takes over my mind.

 

this thanksgiving has thrown me into a stupid hurricane of thoughts and I just need to talk to someone about it because I can't tell anyone in my life.

 

thanksgiving, my ex's dad wrote me a happy thanksgiving text. I have not talked to that man since before we broke up so it was a very BIG surprise for me, and kinda threw me for a loop but I wrote back a thank you and that was that. we had always gone to his dads house on thanksgiving so I wrote it off as maybe his dad was being sentimental.

 

then yesterday I recevied a friend request from my ex's best friend. I was very close to this guy and it hurt losing his friendship when we broke up

 

so in my head I am starting to think "what is going on lately?" maybe ex broke up with the girlfriend or something.... stupid I know.

 

it took me til just now to decide to accept his request (big mistake). the second I accepted I hated myself..... staring right at me was a pic of my ex with his girlfriends sister on this dudes wall. it made me sick to my stomach seeing his face. I have avoided it for so long and now I have this image imprinted in my head of him

 

then about five minutes later I went to look the guy up again and he had DEFRIENDED me.

 

why would he even request to be my friend if he was going to defriend me right away.

 

so in the end, because I was weak and caved into my ex's stupid grip over my emotions, I had to see a picture of my ex that made me sick, and I looked like a huge moron when I accepted a friend request against what my heart was telling me and then got defriended immediately

 

so now here I am feeling stupid I really hate I caved into it all when I was doing so good.

 

and I almost thought it was a good idea to unblock my ex and his girlfriend to see what they were up to before this happened. THANK GOD I did not.

 

meanwhile, I am also a jerk for reacting this way when I am with someone. I care for my boyfriend greatly, it just seems like getting over my ex 100% completely is never going to happen. I feel as if I am always going to feel this way. it sucks.

[CubbyBear]

I really hate to say this but you're not over ex yet so you have no business being with your current boyfriend. How is that fair to him? What if you told him all this stuff, would he still stick around? Most likely not...

 

It's ok to not be 100% over someone. You have to be strong and wait out, no matter how long it takes. You'll eventually get there. And in the meantime, continue down the path of NC...block him/his friends and family from texts and social media.

[ChilliRed2013]

TTT9,

Dont beat yourself up over this! Allow this one slip up, take it as a lesson, a reminder of why you are where you are now.

I blocked my ex and all her friends on FB 6months ago after realising the extent of her betrayal. I was strung along for 4 months prior to that... The blocking removed all pics from view, but recent updates on FB now show their profile pics next to the blocked users private message threads grrr.

Curse that friend of his, very immature behaviour.. no really... curse him, out loud! Hehe

Being polite to the exs parents is nice. They didnt cheat on you. My exs whole family loves me! Means you're a good person, people recognise that just dont stay in regular contact, as thats not your life anymore. Think of it as them wishing you well.

You said it yourself. This new guy treats you like gold! The good guy is right in front of you! Reciprocate, you've got a great new life experience happening right now. Focus on now